A Lost Man Puns

He comes upon a monastery. Desperately tired and hungry, he knocks on the door and shortly after a solemn monk appears.

The man asks if he can come in to rest and get something to eat. The monk replies, “Of course! But all we have to eat is fish and chips.” The monk takes the man to the dining hall where the other monastics are already assembled for dinner.

After the meal the man exclaims, “That was the best meal I have ever had! I must meet the cook.”

Soon after, a portly gentleman emerges from the kitchen and greets the man. The man asks, “Are you the fish fryer?” To which the cook responds:

“No. I’m the chip monk”

Carlos

I don't have time for this!

         One says, “We’re saved! We can ask him for directions!” His friend, however, had a somber expression on his face.
          “Doesn’t something seem off to you about this man?” he replies, gesturing to the figure lying prostrate on the road before them.
          “What do you mean?” said the first, confusion splayed across his features.
          “I mean we can’t trust a thing he says. He’s a pathological lier.”

Ouch.

"Well, I have nothing left, so I guess I'm all right."

He was wearing khaki trousers

I guess you could say he was lack-toes intolerant.

When I asked him how he was doing, he said "I don't feel good"

Dad: Did he lose the arm to a pool shark?

Sadly, he lost his case.

Sadly, he lost his case.

Carloss

Sadly, he lost his case.

Sadly, he lost the case