18 Hilarious The Lost Man Puns

A man is hopelessly lost in the woods...

He comes upon a monastery. Desperately tired and hungry, he knocks on the door and shortly after a solemn monk appears.

The man asks if he can come in to rest and get something to eat. The monk replies, “Of course! But all we have to eat is fish and chips.” The monk takes the man to the dining hall where the other monastics are already assembled for dinner.

After the meal the man exclaims, “That was the best meal I have ever had! I must meet the cook.”

Soon after, a portly gentleman emerges from the kitchen and greets the man. The man asks, “Are you the fish fryer?” To which the cook responds:

“No. I’m the chip monk”

👍︎ 7

💬︎

👤︎ u/FudgeYea

📅︎ Sep 02 2021

🚨︎ report

What did the Russian man say when he lost his wifi?

"I have interNYET..."

👍︎ 37

💬︎

👤︎ u/radixius

📅︎ Jul 17 2021

🚨︎ report

Did you hear about the man who lost his whole left side?

Yeah he's all right now

👍︎ 361

💬︎

👤︎ u/AdWide6476

📅︎ Apr 07 2021

🚨︎ report

Q: Why was the church happy when the man lost his leg in an explosion?

A: Because he was a blast-femur.

👍︎ 5

💬︎

👤︎ u/ensgdt

📅︎ Feb 13 2021

🚨︎ report

Why was the man sad that he lost his cookie from the Chinese Restaurant?

His carelessness cost him a fortune.

👍︎ 13

💬︎

👤︎ u/Dr_Wheuss

📅︎ Sep 10 2020

🚨︎ report

Two travelers are lost in the woods when they come across a man lying in their path.

         One says, “We’re saved! We can ask him for directions!” His friend, however, had a somber expression on his face.
          “Doesn’t something seem off to you about this man?” he replies, gesturing to the figure lying prostrate on the road before them.
          “What do you mean?” said the first, confusion splayed across his features.
          “I mean we can’t trust a thing he says. He’s a pathological lier.”

👍︎ 3

💬︎

👤︎ u/ForestValkyrie

📅︎ May 29 2020

🚨︎ report

Did you hear about the one legged man that lost his prosthetic?

He was hopping mad

👍︎ 7

💬︎

👤︎ u/lvrcerosis

📅︎ Jul 25 2020

🚨︎ report

Did you hear about the man who lost his home and had to live on the streets?

He was really bummed...

👍︎ 2

💬︎

👤︎ u/the_narrow_road

📅︎ Aug 29 2020

🚨︎ report

A man lost his keys in the supermarket, so when he returned to his car, he just rubbed his ass against it

He was wearing khaki trousers

👍︎ 8

💬︎

👤︎ u/Anassis

📅︎ Aug 19 2019

🚨︎ report

What did the man say when he lost his truck?

Hey where's my truck?

👍︎ 2

💬︎

👤︎ u/phillydog1

📅︎ Nov 13 2019

🚨︎ report

This man on a shower posts about the people who lost the tickets in the titanic

👍︎ 6

💬︎

👤︎ u/Oshawottgamer49

📅︎ Apr 06 2019

🚨︎ report

Have you heard about the man who lost the toe sucking tournament?

He tasted defeat.

👍︎ 7

💬︎

👤︎ u/LaterCanIChangeThis

📅︎ Mar 03 2019

🚨︎ report

I once knew a man who had trouble with his balance because he had lost all the toes on his right foot

I guess you could say he was lack-toes intolerant.

👍︎ 5

💬︎

👤︎ u/ZEPHYRight

📅︎ Apr 04 2019

🚨︎ report

The man who has lost his sense of feeling is going mad

He is going out of touch with reality

👍︎ 5

💬︎

👤︎ u/hdeifh

📅︎ Apr 07 2019

🚨︎ report

"I've never had an accident and I never will," said Tom recklessly. . "And then the man took off his shoes to prove he had 11 toes, and I lost the bet," Tom recounted. . "Yes, I'm starting a legal business," Tom affirmed. . More in /R/TomSwifties reddit.com/r/TomSwifties

👍︎ 3

💬︎

👤︎ u/Tom_Swiftie

📅︎ Mar 04 2012

🚨︎ report

Did you hear about the man who lost his left arm and left leg in an accident?

He's all right now.

👍︎ 35

💬︎

👤︎ u/leftonasournote

📅︎ Mar 04 2020

🚨︎ report

Did you hear about the man who lost his left arm and leg?

He’s all right now.

👍︎ 13

💬︎

👤︎ u/atom644

📅︎ Apr 24 2019

🚨︎ report

What happened to the man who lost his whole left side.

Hes all right now.

👍︎ 5

💬︎

👤︎ u/smilefreak

📅︎ Feb 15 2014

🚨︎ report