I'd give it a rating of 50 stars.
Because it took them awhile to get the bugs worked out
An Appalachian appellation.
Joe Bident
USB
Talk about a sad state of affairs
It was an arms race.
This is a hard question, I'll grant you that.
It was unpresidented
Any similarity to actual persons, living or dead, is purely Coinci Dental.
It was O.K.
USB-C
Source: Came up with this myself whilst talking pirate to my 11 year old. (It happens sometimes). Forgive me…
Because their anthem starts with "Oh say can you see".
A lot of people would die.
Nothing, because it's a free country
...cause those hips don’t lie
Mo-roccan.
This joke provided by dads giving babies a bottle in a rocking chair early in the morning.
Because he wanted the right to bear arms.
whoops wrong sub
He's plotting a coo
53 states would make it a prime number; One nation, indivisible.
Tanks for that.
Ay bring ham, Lincoln.
Save them to your Phone and always have witty jokes at the palm of your hand.
3.14 percent of sailors are pi-rates.
5/4 of people admit they’re bad at fractions.
A bartender broke up with her boyfriend, but he kept asking her for another shot.
A brain walks into a bar and takes a seat. “I’d like some wings and a pint of beer, please,” it says. “Sorry, but I can’t serve you,” the bartender replies. “You’re out of your head.”
A cheeseburger walks into a bar. The bartender says, 'Sorry, we don't serve food here.'
A college education now costs $100,000, but it produces three very proud people: the student, his mama, and his pauper.
A couple of cups of yogurt walk into a country club. “We don’t serve your kind here,” the bartender says. “Why not?” one yogurt asks. “We’re cultured.”
A friend of mine didn’t pay his exorcist. He got repossessed.
A friend of mine is known for sweeping girls off their feet. He’s an extremely aggressive janitor.
A guy walks into a bar, and there’s a horse serving drinks. The horse asks, “What are you staring at? Haven’t you ever seen a horse tending bar before?” The guy says, “It’s not that. I just never thought the parrot would sell the place.”
A guy walks into a bar...and he was disqualified from the limbo contest.
A pirate walks into a bar with a paper towel on his head. The bartender says, “What’s with the paper towel?” The pirate says, “Arrr! I’ve got a Bounty on me head!”
A turtle is crossing the road when he’s mugged by two snails. When the police ask him what happened, the shaken turtle replies, “I don’t know. It all happened so fast.”
Armed robbers—some say they’re a drain on society, but you’ve got to give it to them.
Barbers…you have to take your hat off to them.
Can February March? No, but April May!
Cooking out this weekend? Don’t forget the pickle. It’s kind of a big dill.
Dad, can you put my shoes on? No, I don't think they'll fit me.
Dad, can you put the cat out? I didn't know it was on fire.
Dad, did you get a haircut? No, I got them all cut!
Dad: Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? Son: No. What happened? Dad: The teacher woke him up.
Daughter: I have a lot of friends named Nathan. There’s Nathan Miller, Nathan Radcliff, Nathan Lewis… Me: When they are together, do you call them the United Nathans?
Dear Math, grow up and solve your own problems.
Did I tell you the time I fell in love during a backflip? I was heels over head!
Did you hear about the aquatic sea mammals that escape
... keep reading on reddit ➡To be honest, I'm not shedding any tears over it.
Someone has been cutting corners.
Its birthday is July 4th.
There are plenty of ill eagle drugs for just such emergency.
The were The Ruff Riders.
It was a pinto.
The Air Force; they're US AF
When his superior congratulated him for the arrest, he asked “Why did you scream Mickey Mouse?” And the secret serviceman said “I was trying to say Donald Duck!”
In doing so he promises to Make America Grate Again.
WSA
A USB
But in the bathroom, European.
One word
Ay, bring ham, Lincoln
The Air Force, because they're US AF.
