Pharohmones
“I want my mummy”
Lost all of his money in a pyramid scheme
I’m still in de-Nile
Toot-in-common.
He was too wrapped up in his work.
De Nile
Turns out it was a pyramid scheme.
Mum: Can you make up the bed please?
Dad: With lipstick?
I'm on season 6 so far, but not sure what its got to do with security.
He didn't like being the bear of bad news.
Only some get it.
I told her the (pretty good) guess was wrong, the spider is in fact 8 feet.
The wife tutted, the spider rolled all of his eyes and I walked away, feeling accomplished.
They have a toot in common.
My SO called me out recently because when we went to the vets with our kitten, the receptionist approached us in the waiting room with a bag of cat treats and said to my SO "Awww, would he like one?"
I replied "No thanks, I don't like them."
Receptionist awkwardly chuckled, SO tutted and I sat there basking in warmth of my dadjoke victory.
Dad and I are watching a show about the Iceman.
We start talking about mummification and King Tut. I mention to him about the recent damage to the sarcophagus' beard.
He says, "Well that Sphinx."
Well done dad. Well done.
Mom: Did you know what they found in King Tut's tomb?
Me: ... King Tut.
Old Man: LOL
Mom: ...
Woke up on Sunday morning, said to the girlfriend I'd go put the kettle on.
I asked "How do I look?" when I came back into the bedroom wearing it on my dead.
She tutted...
It was his pharoahmones!
