The black eyed peas can sing us a tune
But the chick peas can only hummus one
What do you call it when your tuning fork won’t stop ringing?
I like to listen to music as I fall asleep, so I tuned the radio to the Metal station
I've always been a heavy sleeper.
No matter where I go, I like to bring my ukulele, then, whenever someone asks if I play an instrument, I say...
“I play a little guitar!"
I used to be a judge for the world orchestra championships, but I quit because too many of them were coming out with outlandish sob stories to win me over...
Always trying to get the symphony vote.
My friend asked me why his car is making a humming noise.
I told him it’s probably because it doesn’t know all the lyrics.
What’s the difference between a piano glue and a fish
You can tune a piano but you can’t tuna fish
the fisherman was playing his out of tune guitar
A brand new type of tea!
There's a new type of tea that changes colour, plays 8-bit tunes and even makes the whole room you're in fill the air with its contents.
It's called hue-midi-tea.
What song do you sing when you step on ants?
Dead ant, dead ant. Dead ant dead ant dead ant, dead ant dead annnnttt, dead-ant-dead-ant-dead-ant
(Tune of Pink panther theme)
Came with the house my brother bought. The thing sticking out is his tuning fork
Up next: How to sound good in a band. Stay Tuned!!
You think your tunes bump?
Broadway has a new show that combines magic with the tunes of a 70’s Swedish Pop Band
It’s called ABBA-Cadabra.
Never pick a fight with a music teacher
You may think it’s A minor offense, but the punishment could B major
My friend told me that you can't tune a fish. I disagree.
They have many scales but they are all over the place
I can only imagine the frustration behind the making of modern Looney Tunes shows.
There has to be a lot of Bugs in the programs they use.
What do you call a little tune about atmospheric moisture?
My guitar seems to be tuned a bit flat
Dorothy overheard everyone saying how she can't sing "Carry on my Wayward Son" in tune and she's becoming a liability...
Looks like she's not in Kansas anymore
A bloke came up to me and said im going to attack you with the neck of my guitar.
I said to him is that a Fret!
I'm not a bad singer!
I'm just using Out-of-Tune
DAD, TO A SINGER: "Don’t forget a bucket." SINGER: "Why?" DAD: "To carry your tune."
What tunes do exterminators get down to?
Smashmoth, Deadmouse, and Pop-a-roach
What did the musician say on commercial break?
"If organ trafficking is illegal...."
"Then what about pianos?"
-my dad
What kind of pants does Mario wear?
An out-of-tune love song
Plenty of Fish in the C-Sharp
I was tuning a guitar. While doing this one of the stings snapped in half perfectly. I took one half and stretched It out. I managed to get it on. One problem though. As soon as I played it shot straight to the ceiling.
I’d never heard or seen such a high note.
A man walked into a hardware store, picked up a can of fly spray and asked the assistant, "Is this good for wasps?"
my friend writes tunes about sewing machines
she's a Singer songwriter
I was the solo support act for minor local rock group, 'Nothing'. My set went terribly. I was out of tune, really nervous, the equipment was failing too. The crowd began to boo and leave in droves.
I said, "you ain't seen Nothing yet!"
"Ar, Mateys. This tune be called Interstate Love Song".
What did the fans say to the band named after a famous chickpea spread?
If someone covers their face with blood and belts out tunes...
...would that make them a menstrual singer?
Local TV weatherman breaks all of his limbs but insists on coming in to work...
...tune in at 11, to see his four-casts.
What's the sea's favourite kind of music?
My uncle quit the orchestra after the conductor complained he was out of tune
A tuning fork is a pitch fork
The Black Eyed Peas can sing us a song...
But the Chickpeas can only hummus a tune.
You can tune a piano but you can’t tunafish.
I can tune a piano
But I don’t know how you tuna fish
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