ba dum tss (sorry for the light mode)
While talking about Tommy Hilfiger and the prices of Tommy Hilfiger. I randomly did this
I used to be a hangman
I would hang the thieves that were caught stealing. One day I got fired, It's because I didn't get the execution right.
(badum tss)
My brother sees me near our tent, putting his E-reader on a pile of sticks.
He yells: "What the hell are you doing, Some_Dumb_Dude?!"
I say: "What's with the tone? You have to use Kindle to make a fire, Right?
'Ba dum tss'
He just sighs. "I hate you."
Two Drums and a Cymbal Fall Off of a Cliff
how do you call an idiot in music ?
a drum bass !!
badum tss...
What is the least spoken language?
A sheep, a drum and a snake fall down a cliff,
Why can't Woody play his guitar?
He doesn't know where his Pixar.
Hey Kids, wanta hear a dadjoke about Social Security?
Ah, nevermind, you probably won't get it anyways?
I don't usually brag about my drum jokes but um...
I wish I can be like that parent when I grow up
he broke their air conditioner and then things got heated.
Are you sure heaven is a fun place to be?
Because I was told it's nice as HELL! *ba-dum-tss*
Also works as a Welcome Mat.
My daughter was playing dress up and asked if I knew were any hats were
I said, "Not off the top of my head. Ba dum tss"
If you're born on Earth Day, then it's your B-Earth-Day.
Ba-dum-tss
- Yes, I'm born on Earth Day
What sound drum set from the junkyard makes?
We can now safely say that we're in the middle of World coronisation
What is a pirates favorite letter?
You might say R, but his true love be the C
The secret service isn't allowed to yell "Get down!" anymore when the president is about to be attacked.
Now they have to yell "Donald, duck!"
The lettuce at the bottom of our pan was frozen solid.
Coworker 1: Aw shucks looks like we got the wrong lettuce.
Coworker 2: What do you mean? It's the same lettuce we usually get.
Coworker 1: Nuh uh, this is clearly iceberg lettuce.
Badum tss
The 90s summed up !
90+91+92+93+94+95+96+97+98+99 =945 !!!!!
Ba dum tss!!!
What's a blockchain developer's fav breakfast item?
A man called the police regarding a fly problem…
So I'm watching a show called outrageous 911 Calls, and there was a story of an old man who was cooking bacon that ended up burning. So he opens up his back door to try and air out some of the smoke. Well, the smell starts attracting flies and of course he calls the police to report it and hope that they can send someone to handle the fly issue. The emergency operator says the police cannot do anything to help him.
So I turn to my friend who is watching along side me, and I say, "Obviously the police can't help him, he needs a swat team."
Bah dum, tss
Old prospectors had a way to tell different rocks apart...
Real gold makes a sound like: clink clink
Fool's gold makes a sound like: tchk tchk
And then there's comedy gold - ba dum tss
when I smelled breakfast in the morning it was bacon me eggcited.
Why can't two even numbers be together?
Because the odds are against them.
What sound did the lamb, the drum and the snake make when you threw it from a cliff?
A sheep, a drum, and a snake fell off a cliff
A sheep, a drum, and a snake fall off a cliff
Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff
Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff
A sheep, a drum, and a snake fall down a cliff..
A lamb, a drum, and a snake all fell off a cliff
A Sheep, Drum, and Snake fall off a cliff.
A sheep, a drum, and a snake fell off a cliff.
A sheep, a drum and a snake fell down the hill..
A sheep, drum, and a snake fall off a cliff.
A sheep, a drum, and a snake all fall off of a cliff...
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