Where the hell is my roof?
And our solar system is named "Sol". Can we rename the next system Sol 2? Or what could be considered as sister system. You know, Sol sister reasons
They go to…
The plantetarium
Courtesy of my son. I’m so proud.
Where the heck is the ceiling?
“My roof has disappeared”
They needed their space.
That's unsettling
Sirius, aka The Dog Star.
Unfortunately, I struck out. I suppose I should have known better than to go looking for love in Alderaan places.
I’m proud of you, sun.
I guess the old saying is true: where there's Snoke, there's fire.
Stranger things have happened.
Fortunately the store has a Leia Way program.
Divorce is strong with this one.
He becomes the ManDeLorean
Like I explained: "Mini Hans make light work."
Well I guess we cantaloupe :(
I feel I should be mad, but its a good movie, so the needs of the Nanny outweigh the needs of the few, or my son.
It was a huge fandom menace.
...it was a real boba fête.
Chris Pine pines pines.
Apparently, nobody was interested in buying ‘Shatner Panties’.
They are 2D too.
A friend of mine has this great idea for a small business selling collectables, so he goes into a bank and walks up to the teller.
He can see from her nameplate that the teller's name is Patricia Whack. So he says, "Ms. Whack, I'd like to get a loan for a small business venture."
Patty looks in disbelief as she realizes this voice is coming from a dog. But being professional she clears her throat and asks how much he wants to borrow.
The dog says $500,000. And proceeds to fill out the loan paperwork.
Patty, the teller, reviews the paperwork and notices his name and is a little star struck as it reads: Buddy Mick Jagger. Feeling embarrassed, but curious, Patty asks if there is any relation to THE Mick Jagger?
The dog sighs and says, yes, Mick is his father, adopted, but his father nonetheless.
Patty explains that $500,000 is a substantial amount of money and that he will need something to act to secure such a large loan.
The dog says, "Yes ma'am. I have several sets of these" and shows her a tiny porcelain elephant, about half an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly shaped. He then produces more and more of these small porcelain animals all hand crafted and painted various colors. While trying to explain these collectables are what he hopes to sell Patty becomes very confused and thinks up a quick excuse:
"Well, for such a large loan and unusual collateral I will have to consult the branch manager."
Ms Whack finds the manager and says "There's a talking dog named Buddy Mick Jagger out here who claims to be a relation to Mick Jagger and wants a loan for $500,000. And as collateral he wants to use this?" She then holds up the small porcelain elephant. "I mean, what even is this? Is it valuable?"
The bank manager stands up, blinks a few times, looks her straight in the eye with a large smile and says: "Oh! That's a knick knack, Patty Whack. Give the dog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone!"
(My grandpa would tell this joke at family gatherings to all of us grandkids, we would only ever get small parts of it at a time, but the rest of the adults would always groan at the end. Wasn't till many years later I realized this was a pretty common long haul joke! Still a good memory, hopefully it have you a chuckle!)
The husband looked at his wife and said, "divorce is strong with this one."
Itadaki-mass
He goes by Darth Trader
It's Star Trek: The Search for Spork
No comet.
Rogue one, me zero.
One cold, snowy Minnesota night, I got lost on the way home. The snow was blowing so fast and piling up so high, I couldn't see any street signs. With no map in my car and a dead cell phone, I thought I might be stranded so I pulled over to the side of the road.
Then breaking through the flurries, I saw the headlights of a plow truck in my rearview mirror. Thanking my lucky stars, I turned in and followed the truck, hopeful that it would lead me back somewhere I recognized.
I followed that truck for what felt like hours. He turned left, I'd turn left. He'd swing to the right, and I was right on his tail. After a while, I saw brake lights from the plow, followed by four-way flashers. The plow had stopped, and I saw the driver get out and approach my car. I rolled down the window to talk to him.
"Why are you following me, kid?" the plow driver asked.
"Well sir, my dad told me if I was ever lost in a snowstorm, I should wait for a plow truck and then follow it."
"Well," said the plow driver. "I just finished clearing the Target parking lot. Want to follow me over to Best Buy??"
Thought Id better make the effort and took her fine dining. Michelin 3 stars so real nice food.
She ended up having frogs legs and 3 small pigeon breasts.
I cant lie, It put me off so much I asked to put her clothes back on
...i don't think you understand the gravity of the situation...
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For every star wars pun said out loud, I need to put $5 into the star wars pun jar-jar
They became the Alpha Centurions.
Security soon twigged I wasn't the real McCoy
He wanted to be the only star on set.
She could be Amanda Mandalorian DeLorean
Where the fuck is my roof ?
“My roof has disappeared.”
