The Dirt Puns

A list of puns related to "The Dirt"

From my 10 year old son: Why did the coffee taste like dirt?

Because it was ground.

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👤︎ u/Angus-Mackenzie
📅︎ Feb 06 2021
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Two drunk guys were about to get into a brawl. One of the guys grabs a stick and draws a line in the dirt and says "If you cross this line, I'll hit you in the face".

That was the punchline

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👤︎ u/neo-1000
📅︎ Sep 22 2020
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What did the dirt bike say to the puddle?

"Are you my mudder?"

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👤︎ u/logansworth
📅︎ Feb 06 2021
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Two drunk guys were about to get into a fight, when one draws a line in the dirt and slurs, “If you cross this, I’ll hit you in the face.” /r/Jokes/comments/jx9abu/…
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👤︎ u/goldendarren
📅︎ Nov 19 2020
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I was showing off my hibiscus plants to my neighbor, he says the roots are exposed, and I should get more dirt on them.

So I found out they were both having affairs, and stealing from their company's fundraisers!

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👤︎ u/xknav3x
📅︎ Sep 10 2020
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Someone brought a box full of flue dirt to the formal dress gala for the chimney sweepers...

It was quite suity in there!

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Jul 21 2020
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My son tried coffee for the first time today and said it tasted like dirt

I told him "It was just ground this morning."

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👤︎ u/Im_A_Freakin_Joke
📅︎ Sep 19 2019
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With the nice warm weather last weekend, a neighbor was enthusiastically diggin' in the dirt planting his garden!

He was so excited about it, he wet his plants.

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👤︎ u/djpatientnathan
📅︎ May 07 2020
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Despite all the dirt, I finally could grab a good photo of that metal milling facility reddit.com/r/Jokes/commen…
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👤︎ u/Constant__Pain
📅︎ Oct 17 2019
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First time I plowed my garden, I noticed something shiny in one of the hunks of dirt. Upon rubbing it, I found the whole hunk of dirt was shiny on the inside! I repeated this on other hunks of dirt and each one was shiny on the inside! That made me realize...

Every clod has a silver lining.

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Nov 24 2019
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What do you call an animal that hoards all the dirt?

A groundhog

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👤︎ u/whatlineisitanyway
📅︎ Jun 02 2019
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The Pun Patrol thought he had me, but he didn’t get any “dirt” on us! imgur.com/a/E4HsWSN
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👤︎ u/rbshag
📅︎ Mar 20 2019
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I accused my wife of adding dirt to the garden. She denied it.

The plot thickens.

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👤︎ u/keithasaurus
📅︎ Aug 27 2018
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I was reading a book the other day and a man started adding dirt to a farmers land.

That’s the point in the book where the plot thickened.

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👤︎ u/personGuy02
📅︎ Apr 01 2019
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I bought a desk lamp for a dirt cheap price but it broke the day after. Went to the store to complain but I couldn’t get it fixed or refunded.

The store’s manager told me that I bought a one night stand.

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👤︎ u/DAY_DREAM3R
📅︎ Apr 03 2019
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My wife keeps saying to put down the bag of dirt I'm holding.

But I'm keeping my ground

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👤︎ u/udrys
📅︎ Mar 09 2019
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Why did the chicken roll around in dirt then cross the road twice?

Because he wanted to be a dirty double crosser

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👤︎ u/Pinkninja1228
📅︎ Jan 22 2019
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I ate some dirt the other day.

Never again. I got so il

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👤︎ u/Ganders81
📅︎ May 31 2017
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Two drunk guys were about to get into a fight, when one draws a line in the dirt and slurs, “If you cross this line, I’ll hit you in the face.”

That was the punchline...

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👤︎ u/bot_10
📅︎ Oct 23 2019
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Two drunk guys were about to get into a fight. One draws a line in the dirt and says, “If you cross this line, I’ll hit you in the face.”

That was the punchline.

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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Jan 26 2019
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Two drunk guys were about to get into a fight. One draws a line in the dirt and says, "If you cross this line, I'll hit you in the face."

That was the punchline.

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👤︎ u/skylly100
📅︎ Dec 12 2019
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