The dog says, βbut I rounded them up.β
I saw a sheep in town the other day and the shear brilliance of its fleece caught my eye. I asked it, "what are ewe doing here?" The sheep replied "I'm out on the lamb"
I didn't even know they could knit!
Dad: "Son, do you know how to get the attention of those sheep?"
Me: ? "No...."
Dad: (shouting out the window) "Hey ewe!"
Husband: emphatic no, five letters Wife: never H: pistol, three letters W: gun H: disgust, three letters W: ugh H: charity, four letters W: give H: female sheep, three letters W: ewe H: Pixar movie, two letters W: Up
An art critic was judging paintings at an event.
The first one was a bland painting of the earth. not too bad, but nothing out of this world.
The second one was a blank painting. Why they even turned it it, donβt ask.
The third one though. The third one was a beautifully crafted painting of a sheep.
The art critic turned to the artist. All they had to say was, βWow, I am wooly astonished. The shear amount of detail of this art ewe made, which definitely lambs you into first place. This might be way pasture standards, but too baaad, donβt be sheepish. This piece definitely separates the sheep from the goats, it will definitely farm you some moo-lah.
She opens the front door and there is a huge log on a chain contraption that can ram castle gates.Β Confused, she looks past the medieval device to see her boyfriend standing in the front yard surrounded by dozens of male sheep and holding two tickets to skybox seats for football in Los Angeles.
He holds his arms wide and asks, "what do you think?"
She smiles and says, "Thank you for the rams but all I want for Christmas is ewe."
So a black sheep took it upon himself to run into the woods to stop the birds. And it worked! The moral of the story? Lonely ewe can prevent forest flyers.
Dad: you're a sheep! Son: what? Dad: I said ewe and you looked!
What sheep goes underwater and blows up your ship?
A ewe boat!!
Then proceeded to laugh hysterically
My family and I walked into the sheep barn at the county fair. My son proclaims loudly. " dad, it stinks in here" to which I reply. " ya ,it smells like ewe". While looking him dead in the eye. It took all involved about 15 seconds before eyes were rolled and the usual ohh daaaad commenced.
