A list of puns related to "Screen Time"
Not HDMI, because Baby Yoda can't speak.
So I just asked if he wanted a log book to keep track.
That's a little mean.
I just love synchronised Schwimmers
It was a brisk Saturday morning when Gerald arrived at βThe CafΓ©,β a hip coffee shop right down the street. Wearing his large, burly black coat, he stared hesitantly at his watch. Thick glasses adorned his bright blue eyes, his gaze like starlight in a clear night sky. He was waiting, intently twiddling his thumbs. After a buzz of his phone, the message from Dad popped up: βParking now, be there in 5.β
βDad,β he whispered under his breath, swiping the message away to once again reveal the image on his lock-screen: a hazy picture of an ultrasound.
Gerald had not spoken to his father for three years. They had had a falling out, over which he did not remember. To him it was a competition of who could wait the longest without calling or sending a text. Who could wait the longest: him without a father, or his father without a son? The idea of friction in the relationship hurt like a thorn; piercing his soul more and more everyday. Until recently, out of the blue, βDadβ popped up on his phone. The rest is history. The rest leads to that Saturday morning, at The CafΓ©.
Bang! A car door rang out not too far from where Gerald stood. Gerald saw him. His father wore his tweed jacket like a coat of armor. His strut was now weaker than before they stopped talking; a weakness evident in his cane which supported every right step. His shortly trimmed white beard juxtaposed against his uncut, curly grey hair gave him the image of a wise wizard from a fairytale. He used to be that figure to Gerald, yet instead of a nice ancient being acting like a stone to keep him grounded, Gerald had felt as though his father was a rock pulling him deeper and deeper into a sea of monotony. Holding him back from his true potential. Maybe that was why he left? He still did not know.
βHello, son,β came the withered voice Gerald had sook for so long, yet now that it had arrived wanted to avoid. βI canβt believe itβs been so long!β
βYeah,β said Gerald, allowing a smile to grace his face. βToo long!β
Then they hugged, signifying a change in their relationship. Gerald had hoped something could happen to bring them closer together. He did not want to go on wondering what could have been. The regret and sadness weighed him down. Before starting a new family, Gerald wanted to be reacquainted with his own.
After finding their table and sitting down, the two began to discuss life. It was like old friends catching up after a long break. Although it took some time, Gerald began to warm u
... keep reading on reddit β‘She asked about the girl on screen getting ready for her routine: "Is she Russian?"
To which I replied : "No she's taking her time"
The eye roll was fantastic.
Took my iMac in because the hard disc failed. The machine is 6 yrs old so I was made to feel embarrassed coz it was 'vintage and obsolete, Apple don't carry parts and can't help'. I was becoming a bit pissed off at the attitude I was getting then more pissed off when Mr Genius started to tell me to buy some suction pads that glaziers use to carry sheets of glass around, pull out the screen, undo 18 screws etc etc to change the disc myself. That's when I hit him with...
"Glaziers' suction pads? I thought they were only compatible with windows"
He didn't even flinch. Just completely ignored it and carried on sneering at me for having the audacity to be using an old machine. I left feeling like a piece of shit with only pride in my joke keeping me going.
She said thatβs the last time sheβll play split screen with me.
Every time I get it wrong the screen tells me what my password is.
My Dad and I were getting dinner ready when I quizzed him on how he seasoned the chicken and gravy mixture he was fawning over.
"Uh I haven't put anything in but the chicken, and the gravy."
"Were you going to season it?"
"Wasn't planning on it." he finished, apparently done with the conversation as his full attention was now on whatever football game was on. I decided if he wasn't going to take the initiative and make our food taste like something other than bland than I would.
"Here Dad put in some garlic," I said as i started grabbing spices from the cabinet.
"Some basil, salt, pepper, thyme... " I didn't see any thyme in here which was too bad because it would be just the thing for this.
"Hey DAD do we have any thyme left?" I asked him a little louder than I had been talking before.
"Time for what?" he asked, finally breaking his attention from the flat screen, a severely confused and almost worrried look cemented on his brow. And then, as quick as a camera lens closing to capture a shot, he winked.
.
.
.
TL;DR I'm pretty sure you have enough thyme to read it.
A friend was telling my dad about the new disaster movie Twister. >Friend: "The special effects are so amazing. They actually showed a cow flying across the screen."
>My Dad: "Oh, pasteurize (Past your eyes)?"
Long time ago, but hard to forget!
We had just dined with whole family when my sis took out her phone. Grandma peeked my sisters screen and said, "All of them have such washboard stomachs." We all were kinda feeling awkward. Until dad said: "Hmh, they are left behind their time. I've got a washing machine right here."
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