Did you hear about the baseball player who can spot a fast food restaurant from miles away?
He leads the league in Arby eyes.
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︎ Jan 04 2021
There's a department of the United Nations which tries to improve the quality of food in restaurants.
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︎ Dec 05 2020
A Bavarian guy walks into a restaurant that only serves seed-based foods...
...and you know what, the germinate!
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︎ Oct 28 2020
What do you call a german thief that's robbing a fast food restaurant?
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︎ Nov 11 2020
I went to a Norwegian restaurant the other day. The food was delicious. The service was superb. The only problem was...
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︎ Aug 13 2020
I waited a long time for my food at the midget restaurant
I guess they were a little short-staffed
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︎ Oct 17 2020
Me with my friend in a restaurant after finishing food
Waiter asking me how would you like to pay sir? Cash or Card!
Me looking at my friend: PayPal
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︎ Jun 17 2020
At the restaurant, my family was nearly finished eating and I still had half a plate of food left. The waitress asked, "Do you wanna box for that?"
I replied, "No thanks, I'd rather wrestle for it!"
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︎ Jul 06 2020
Last night I went to my favorite restaurant. They only sell food made from Slutty Potatoes
Their best dish is the Tater-Thots.
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︎ May 11 2020
A guy starts choking on his food in a restaurant.
A doctor sees the man choking and springs into action. He runs across the restaurant, pulls the man out of his chair, pulls the man's pants down, and licks his butt. The man coughs hard, and the food is dislodged from his throat.
Grateful, he turns to doctor and says, "Thank God you knew the Hind Lick Maneuver!"
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︎ Jan 03 2020
I've got an idea for a Morrocan restaurant. It's gonna serve traditional food but cooked in non traditional, anti-authoritarian ways....
...I'm gonna call it 'Rage Against The Tajine'
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︎ Dec 21 2019
A man takes his wife to an unusual restaurant where you must stand in separate lines for each food item ...
As they sit down, the husband offers to go get their dinner. First he waits in line for the roast beef. Then he waits in the line for the potatoes. He he waits in the vegetable line, the bread line, the salad line, and even the gravy line.
He finally returns to the table with two heaping plates of food. βWhat would you like to drink?β he asks.
βA glass of punch would be nice,β she says. So off he goes to get it. He finds a line for wine, a line for beer, a line for soda, a line for milk, even a line for water. After considering all of his options he gives up and returns to the table empty-handed.
Sometimes there is no punch line.
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︎ Sep 26 2019
I took my wife to a fancy restaurant where they make the food in front of you, but she wasn't very happy.
I told her next time she can pick the restaurant, if she really hated Subway that much.
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︎ Aug 29 2019
An Australian chess player went into a restaurant and ordered food. After having his food , the waiter asked him "Cash or Credit , Sir?"
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︎ Oct 22 2019
I offered to help publish a book of recipes for a local Indian food restaurant.
They made me sign a naan-disclosure agreement.
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︎ Dec 06 2019
I went to a restaurant on the moon great food but sadly no atmosphere
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︎ Aug 07 2019
Me and my date got tired of eating in dark restaurants, the food isn't even that great
Today we ate the dinner with delight.
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︎ Oct 05 2019
Whoever called the loops in malls with restaurants "food courts" missed a huge opportunity. They ought to be cul-de-snacks.
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︎ Jun 29 2018
When youβre in a restaurant and everyone has his food
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︎ Jan 11 2018
So we had a food fight contest in a mexican restaurant.
Not exactly a joke, just something to taco bout.
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︎ Dec 01 2018
Why did the owners of the Indian food restaurant decide to be closed on Mondays?
They were tired of working naan stop and needed to tikka break.
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︎ Jun 09 2019
I went to a Chinese food restaurant and the appetizers got me really high
Thatβs the last time I order the pot stickers
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︎ Jun 15 2019
I went to a restaurant with two friends the other day one of them ordered a rare steak and the other asked for a medium rare steak. When we got our food they had each other's steaks,
I then instinctively yelled "I guess this was just a big 'mistake'"
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︎ Jul 06 2019
'At a restaurant with food still on my plate' Server: "You wanna box for that?"
Me: 'It's not worth fighting over'
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︎ Oct 07 2018
Did you hear about the dad who got divorced after starting a food fight in a restaurant?
As you can guess, his wife got custurdy.
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︎ Mar 16 2019
I went to a Vietnamese restaurant. The food was to die pho.
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︎ Jan 12 2019
How are Chinese food restaurants still in business?
They lose fortunes every day
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︎ Sep 14 2018
I want to open a buffet restaurant with only glutenous foods...
called βall you can wheatβ
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︎ Dec 05 2018
When eating at an italian restaurant, watch your food carefully.
Someone might sieze your salad.
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︎ Apr 19 2018
Fast food restaurant takes a few minutes,...bag gets handed over with, βSorry about the wait.β
βItβs not heavy at all!β
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︎ Apr 02 2018
Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere
source;
zhttps://www.instagram.com/p/BjewX90g6tj/?hl=nl&taken-by=jojothegamingdad
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︎ Jun 01 2018
The teenager at [insert fast food restaurant here] hands me my food and says "Sorry for the wait"
To which I reply "That's okay, I will lose it eventually"
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︎ Aug 05 2017
Did you hear about the food fight at the Indian restaurant?
There were injuries to many naan combatants.
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︎ Aug 28 2015
What did the police say when they raided a sea food restaurant?
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︎ Oct 24 2017
What cold food do you order at a fast food restaurant?
What cold food do you order at a fast food restaurant?
A Brrrrrrger.
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︎ Dec 04 2020
Did you here about the restaurant on the moon?Great food, no atmosphere.
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︎ Nov 23 2018
Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere.
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︎ May 25 2019
The food in the restaurant at the moon is good
but there is no atmosphere
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︎ Feb 05 2019
There's a department of United Nations which tries to improve the quality of food in restaurants.
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︎ Jan 17 2019
did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? great food, no atmosphere
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︎ Aug 11 2018
Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere.
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︎ Sep 01 2017
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