What did Mr.T say when his horse gave birth prematurely?
I recently joined a premature ejaculation help group……
I didn’t know what to wear to the first meeting, so I just came in my pants !
I said to my boss the other day, "I need to leave early today, I'm going to be a father!"
“He replied, "Of course! Take the afternoon off." When I returned to work the next day, he came to my desk, smiled and asked, "Well, how'd it go? Is it a boy or a girl?" I shrugged, "I don't know..."
"I'll tell you in nine months!"
How do you name prematurely born Viking?
This morning I went to a meeting at my Premature Ejaculators support group...
What did the farmer name his 2 premature chicks?
I've been worried about premature ejaculation becoming a problem in the next few years...
...but it came sooner than I expected
What happened to the squirrel that was born premature?
He lived his life being a little squirrelly
The last time I was involved in sexual intercourse.....
I work in payroll for Buffalo's football team.
It's not the most fulfilling job, but it pays the Bills.
I ordered a book about premature ejaculation
I went to a premature ejaculator's support group today.
When my daughter was born, the nurse brought in a heated blanket.
I asked if it was womb temperature.
Cheese had to go to the incubator
Where do prematurely born calves go to get care
Premature ejaculation is a real shortcoming to have.
I went to Premature Ejaculators Anonymous but nobody was there.
A guy goes into a library and asks about books on premature ejaculation. The librarian tells him the book is checked out til next week.
The guy comes in the next day looking for the books again but quickly apologizes. Sorry I came early.
I met a man who suffered from premature ejaculation once.
Whenever we met he would just come out of nowhere.
They're developing a pill for premature ejaculation.
It's not out yet, but it's coming soon.
Our son was born prematurely, so we named him Earl
He was just a little Early
What did my asian girlfriend say after my premature ejaculation?
I wrote a book about not falling in love too fast
It’s called “Premature Infatuation”
My girlfriend knows I have premature ejaculation
But she accepts my shortcomings.
I just read a very interesting article about premature ejaculation...
...the website said it would be about an 8-minute read but I was able to finish sooner.
A guy in a physics exercise shaved his head.
Now, hair resistance is negligible.
One time I prematurely ordered a bust of me.
Ten minutes before the fire alarm went off my friend Steve was standing in the parking lot wearing his jacket.
I never knew he suffers from premature evacuation
Staff gathered in the car park for a fire drill at the sperm bank before the alarm had gone off,
it was a premature evacuation.
The superhero Premature Ejaculator would have the catchphrase "I came as quickly as I could!"
What did the Indian father call his premature newborn?
What do you get when a volcano erupts too early?
Every time I post on r/dadjokes, someone comments with a better version of my joke
I guess I suffer from premature ejokeulation
I told a dad joke too soon.
It was a Premature Ejokeulation
I started to make a sauce for dinner and as I added a thickening agent, it all came together too quickly...
I suffered from premature coagulation.
What do you call it when the fire alarm goes off during sex
My third son was born yesterday morning, 3 weeks early.
The nurse, my wife, and my mom discussing how he "came so early"
I interject with "I guess you could say he has a problem with, premature evacuation"
To my surprise they all actually laughed hard.
Vampires need to stop turning their victims at such a young age.
Help end Premature Draculation.
Dadjoke'd my college class
So I forgot my school was having a planned fire drill. I was hanging outside my class building, ditching with my girlfriend when everybody suddenly poured out. My teacher came out in front of the entire class and asked me why I was already outside. I don't know what came over me, I guess my brain went into auto-defense-dad-mode because I told him:
What can I say? I'm a premature evacuator.
MERRY CHRISTMAS!
Sorry, I suffer from premature celebration.
At my sister's high school graduation, one kid threw his cap in the air too early.
My dad turns to me and says, "Oops, Premature Ecapulation."
I didn’t know what to wear to my premature ejaculators meeting...
So I just came in my pants.
This morning I went to a meeting of my premature ejaculators’ support group
But it turns out that it’s tomorrow
I went to my premature ejaculation support group today...
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