Playing Card Game Puns

Snap!

Nothing like playing blackjack with Jack Black over a stack of flapjacks

5-card stud or stirrup poker?

Asking for a friend.....

A few years ago, was playing a card game with my frisbee team. We were competing in a frisbee tournament for spring break, and we had discs lying all around the Airbnb we were sleeping in. After playing the first few hands, I realized I didn't know what to do with my old cards.

I asked my teammate where I should put my used up cards. They pointed to some cards lying in a frisbee.

It was a disc card, discard pile.

I wrote a little skit for my grandkids let's see how much I remember. CHUM 8 news Ted Hammerhead reporting with sky Chompter traffic report. Top story, a lone shark, who is a loan shark is alone in the dark making loans to sharks! There is a new place to gamble, the place is full of sharks who turn out to be card sharks playing card games with sharks on the cards. Imagune the dogs playing poker for this story, but it's sharks. The other reporter asks Ted Hammerhead how he did on his recent drivers test, Ted responds "nailed it". Crime scene where a clown has been killed and the Detective states, " No way a shark did this as they taste funny". On a comment about the victim. I never did the weather or figured out names for the other reporters we used to laugh and laugh at my stupid puns.

Edit: I can't spell fixed typos

… u/ebkbk for this post: Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian. made on 24.11. with 38.9k upvotes

[also already made by u/Tface on 25.03. for 16.9k upvotes]

Let's move on to the top 3 of each month:

January:

1. Is this sub still active? by u/I_Fart_Liquids on 01.01. with 36.4k upvotes

2. Gonorrhea would have been a great name for diarrhea medicine by u/daugarten on 20.01. with 30.8k upvotes

3. An open letter to the mods of r/dadjokes: by u/Alfie_13 on 27.01. with 18.9k upvotes

February:

1. Was watching Star Wars with my daughter. She asked why Luke was climbing inside a Tauntaun, I said to keep warm. by u/jakeisbill on 05.02. for 20.3k upvotes

2. My daughter asked me what I'm posting on Reddit... by u/madazzahatter on 25.02. for 18.3k upvotes

3. When a woman is giving birth, she is literally kidding. by u/ownworldman on 23.02. for 17.7k upvotes

March:

1. I got an e-mail saying, "At Google Earth, we can read maps backwards!" and I thought... by u/madazzahatter on 21.03. for 22.2k upvotes

2. Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. by u/Tface on 25.03. for 16.9k upvotes.

3. [When I reach home, my 1.5 y.o. son rushes out to the gate to sit in my lap while I park the car. Then he just grabs the steering and starts shaking it with brrrmmm brrrmmm sound. His cute antics always make me forget that he's suffering from a rare disease.](https://www.reddit.com/r/da

Superfight is a tabletop game where you make a character with random attributes from the selection of cards dealt to yourself. You will need to justify how your character and their attributes can beat your opponent's character.

We were playing this through Tabletop Simulator and I played a character card titled "Leonardo".

Gf: Dicaprio or Da Vinci

Me: No, DaTurtle

This one requires a little backstory:

There's a cardgame called WHOT! It's just uno but with different shapes. Me and my dad used to play it a lot.

Unfortunately it's led to the same terrible joke being made repeatedly over the last 10 years or so. It goes something like this:

Dad: "You'll never guess what film's on tv tonight."

Me: "What?"

Dad: "No, I don't think they made a movie out of that. It's a card game."

It's literally been going on for over a decade now and it pains me deep inside my soul every time he says it.

My friend and I were playing Magic The Gathering (Card game), and we were talking about our previous games at a tournament that just happened couple days prior. He told me he lost a game due to a little mistake.

His exact words were "Man, I was so stupid. I mis-read it" I replied with "Well, if you mis-read it, theres a computer behind you." My friend then groaned... looked at me, and shook his head, while i laughed at my own joke.

ba dum, tsh!

Playing a card game with my daughter when she scored a point, so I farted and said, "That's what I think about that!" To which she said, "I don't like your opinion, it's stinky and smells bad!"

So my dad thought he would try the ultimate dad joke card game with my 4 year old daughter... good old 52 card pick up!

They sit down, he gets her excited to play, he does the cards all over thing and they both laugh. My 4 year old daughter then picks up 2 cards and says "Here you go!" in a drop mic fashion and walks away to go play something else. She handed him a 5 and a 2.

So this week he chose to make cards for each word. He made two cards for each word and made a Memory game out of them.

We are playing memory and I find the word "Joke" on one paper. I look at my son and say "Hey, you want to hear a joke?" and start to rattle the paper in front of him.

Then when I found the matching card, I said "Hey, want to hear the other joke?"

Upon getting lucky with a bad play in a card game one of my friends exclaimed "Am I smart or what?" His dad playing the same table responded "What."
"Am I smart or what?"
"I heard you the first time, that wasn't a question, it was an answer; what." He couldn't help smiling as he delivered the line to collective groans around the table and me cracking up because my friends old man was completely right, his son misplayed and got lucky.

Playing a game called Hand and Foot where you have a group of cards called your foot.

Dad "Are you on your foot yet?

Me "No I'm on my chair"

Dad [unamused] "Well get on your foot"

Me stands up on 1 foot

I was out with a group of friends and we were deciding what card game to play. One of my friends said, "Well, we could play euchre or something else." I then asked her, "Hmmm, how do you play something else?" Cue the emotionless stare.