My dad has been going through a lot of hard ships lately…
He dismantles them for a living.
We know the Panama has had its problems, and the Suez had that ship stuck recently, but my co-worker must know of another problematic waterway. Every day he yells out...
‘Far Canal. I hate this place’.
When I play battleship I like to arrange my ships in the shape of states...
Michigan
Man: I’m so sorry I’m late for my ship cleaning job. What are my responsibilities?
Boss: You mist the boat.
I'm a sea captain, my crew was goofing off at the back of the ship...
... I had to give them a stern warning.
My friend made shoes out of toy ships and planes.
When asked about it, he said he wanted to be fleet of foot.
A guy starts working at a submarine. In the first day he works as a cleaner, then helps at the kitchen. Next day he runs the ship. In the evening he’s absolutely exhausted so he asks his friend “Why I have to change my position every time?”
He replies “I know, this sub is full of reposts”
My town finally decided to tear down the dilapidated replica of a pirate ship...
It was an aye-sore.
My friend has been having the hardest time getting pool noodles air frieighted in. Last night, he said he's going to have them sent on a container ship...
I said, "whatever boats your float."
My ship was sailing North but then it suddenly veered West and hit another ship...
It was an occident, I swear!
I've started a ship building business out of my garage.
Sails have gone through the roof
My Dad said he watched a documentary about ship building
He said it was riveting.
My friend met the love of his life when the were both vomiting overboard after a rhinovirus hit their cruise ship...
It was a match made in heaving!
I’ve installed podiums and microphones all over my ship.
They’re just for deck oration.
I forgot to ship out my brother's homemade beef jerky and accidentally ate it instead.
It was a missed steak. Honest.
My kid asked why I named our wifi ”ship”
But that’s how everything syncs
The mailman refused to ship my Girl Scout cookies because I put up too many Dad Jokes.
Jokes on him though. I'm just gonna post Samoa.
My first job was on a ship, I was assigned to look for navigational markers. I was a Buoy Scout.
I made my own golf balls. They were supposed to ship in 2 weeks but ended up coming early!
My co-worker wondered out loud why the super nice prison inmates that run our print ship are in jail.
I said, "maybe they killed someone with kindness!"
I started a ship building business in my attic
Sails are going through the roof!
