Morning Coffee Puns

It’s the little tings in life, ya know?

I was halfway to work before I realized I forgot my car.

..I really need to clean a few mugs around here.

I told her this way, she won’t have any grounds for divorce.

Now give me my 7 upvotes

It was mugged.

I'd hate for him to fall asleep at the wheel.

It was grounds for divorce.

I went full sexist pig, “YOU'RE in charge of cooking around here woman and YOU should do it, because it's YOUR job and I can just wait for my coffee.”

She replied coldly, “No, YOU should do it and besides, it's in the Bible that the man should do the coffee.”

I guffawed, “I can’t believe that, show me!”

So she fetched the Bible and opened to the New Testament and showed me the top of several pages, that it indeed says, “HEBREWS!”

I told him he was grounded

It’s always grounds for a good time

It's my break fluid.

> I added half and half

After it brewed, the coffee had too many grounds to appeal...

Hebrews it!

You're just not my cup of tea.

According to the bible, "Hebrews"

Hebrews.

I maintain that's grounds for divorce.

I told her that I didn't want a brewhaha.

She laughed, so I guess I got one anyway.

It makes me coffeedent

It was quite a brew ha ha.

It's fucking close to water.

Depresso

"this coffee is full of grounds... grounds for divorce"

We went to a bagel and coffeeshop this morning for breakfast. As we were fixing our coffee, two coffee workers began arguing over thrown out bagels.

My roommate looked at me and said, "looks like there's some bagel drama brewing." I told him he will make a great dad some day.

I asked my dad if the coffee was ground. He replied, "It should be ground- it was mud this morning!"

Good one, old man.

I really need to clean some mugs

I really need to wash out the mugs...

I really need to wash some mugs.

She said, "It is and you do."

Hebrews.