Hey you, any of you...
I could not stand the madness I was living in. For the one that had read my previous post, about my mother and all... Anyway, the feeling of inadequacy was too much and I couldn't endure it. Now I'm in a coffee store thinking about what to do next. I feel like a horrible mother, the relashionship with my kids being totally hijacked by my mother, for too many years I was stuck in the bad cop role, so much that I don't know how to have fun and pleasure with my children. I don't want to continue this, I don't want to continue to be the stiff,controlling one, the one that have to punish.
I know its cowardly what I'm doing, I know its not the best solution, but that's the only one I can think about. I want my pain to end, and to suggest r/suicide watch. I wanted to be an adult, I wanted to take care of the one I loved, have friends, maybe love...but my mother won't let any of this happen. And I'm tired of barely keeping my head above the water...;m just letting go.
>Do you feel like you can say anything to your teammates, or is there certain stuff you can't?
>Giannis: "When it comes to basketball, I feel like I can talk to them. When it comes to a personal decision like that, it's ... I've got to let them make their decision. They're grown men. You know, and every situation is different. I cannot pressure somebody to do something that he doesn't feel comfortable doing. I can tell you why I did it. Why I felt comfortable doing it. To protect my family, to protect my mom and stuff, stay safe, and you just hope he understands that. But if he doesn't want to do it, I can't keep pressuring him. I've got to focus on myself and come every day and do my job, because that's what I get paid to do. I don't know what relationship they have, what kind of relationship they have. They probably have talked to him but they cannot keep on pressuring him to do something he doesn't feel comfortable because it takes so much energy and takes energy away from basketball. That why we're here."
Just got home about an hour ago. Still trying to wrap my mind around what just occurred. I worked in a vape store in Pittsburgh called "Smoke Glass and Vape" (Genius brand name, I know.)
Requested Christmas eve off on the 5th of December, more so letting my boss know what was happening and not looking for a yes or no. He said he would see what he could do. My brother who I never get to see was visiting from the East coast and he and I are very close so I wanted to spend as much time as possible with him.
Fast forward to the 23rd and my brother surprised me by coming a day early. I messaged my boss to let him know that I wouldn't be coming in tomorrow as I had previously stated and he got very upset. He was telling me holidays are mandatory (even though two people in other stores got to take time off for the holidays), and that he expected me to be at the store.
I never responded. Maybe that wasn't the right thing to do, but I don't really care. I was only being paid $10 an hour to effectively run this guy's business for him.
Fast forward to today, my second day back since Christmas (dude couldn't be bothered to fire me on Sunday I guess. Probably too busy enjoying his holiday). I'm sitting there and in walks my boss. Keep in mind, it's just me in the store at all times. I almost NEVER get any help.
He then proceeds to tell me we need to have a talk and that it's my job to be here and blah blah blah, just typical management shit where he tries to tear me down. I don't let it get to me and after his rant, I simply smile and go "Family over everything."
This set him off into an explosion of personal insults, along with telling me I'm fired. I couldn't believe it. I just laughed a little bit and said "are you serious?" This then set him off even MORE. I'm an idiot, I'm stupid, I don't respect him, I have nothing, I'll never have anything, etc. He trapped me behind the counter so he could just yell at me and I have no way to escape.
This is all coming after he told me I was doing record numbers at his store, I was also the highest-selling salesman during the Black Friday competition where the salesman who sold the most got a "special prize". The special prize was $50 in-store credit. I bit my tongue and just thanked him. I was working 42 hours a week, never called off, and was late maybe once or twice in a span of 4 months.
I got a few choice words in with him. I can't remember the last time I yelled like I did. I have a lot of experience in customer se
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Edit: Wow! With some of these dish descriptions, I’m starting to feel like they could’ve been put here by practical joker aliens in the 70s cook books for their own amusement and hypnotized people into liking them. So many canned this or that mixed with imitation whipped cream, Mayo, shredded veggies, and jello. My gawd! Thanks everyone for your contributions and stories. Some are truly mind blowing. Happy Holidays!
My South American mil makes a kinda sweet thing based in corn starch every Christmas. It’s topped with raisins. Its off white and lumpy with a consistency somewhere between pudding and tire rubber. I would’ve been fine having never met this dish.
As a kid in the 80s/90s with a single mom from a big rural family, some of the stuff people do today that’s zero waste trendy now was just our everyday:
- cloth diapers
- hand me downs
- thrift store shopping for everything first
- cloth napkins
- coffee compost in the garden
- mason jars for storage and preserving things
- eating meat infrequently and everyyy part of the animal (I’ve eaten parts of a pig in childhood I don’t even wanna admit😅🤦🏾♀️)
- using cast iron, ceramic and wood cus it lasted longer than plastic but also keeping plastic foreverrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
- storing food in any old container you could find! Yogurt container? Thanksgiving leftovers, pasta jar? Pickled veg lol
- my mom also made any and everything. Doll clothes, doll furniture, ketchup, Mayo, bread, jam so muchhh.
- as much as we hate passed down clutter, it meant for so long me and siblings and cousins never had to buy new furniture or dishes because it all got passed down!
Please share what you grew up with!
My 11 year old Dachshund/Jack Russel mix- Banjo- has recently been diagnosed with skin cancer. He is booked in on Thursday to have three lumps removed from his ear, chest, and belly. I am really stressed as he has had a lump removed on his ear two years ago and it came back from pathology as malignant.
Although my partner and I will be covering the costs of the operation - which are going to be quite high- my family has been saying very hurtful things about it. “Why waste all that money a dog”. “Vets are scam artists who push bills up.” “It’s just a dog.” “Just let him die the natural way.”
I find these comments very hurtful and insensitive to the point where I had to cut a lunch short today.
I have tried to explain to them that this dog is like a child to me who has been with me through my worst times (when I was depressed and suicidal) but they just laugh at this.
I know that some of my family members are struggling with money (mostly due to their own bad financial planning) and I always try and help them where I can, but they are making me out to be very selfish, and are implying that I should just give the money to them instead.
Has anyone dealt with anything similar? I am really upset about this whole thing as well as stressed for Banjo and his op.
Update: Banjo is out of surgery and it was successful. He is recovering well. Thank you to everyone for their kind words and good wishes towards him and I. I really appreciate them and they have helped me get through these last few days. Thank you kind people.
Title says it all, this might be a first in the UK so I thought I'd offer my experience to the masses. AMA.
I can send proof if mods request it!
I took my kid to the movie today to see SING. We pre-purchased our tickets online as required, & scored some good seats where we like in the middle of the theater.
We arrive just as the previews are starting only to find people sitting in our seats. Mind you, it’s a jampacked theatre and we’re already standing on peoples toes, so I politely ask the lady in my seats, “Excuse me. I think you’re in our seats”
The woman points at the people in the seats next to ours and says, “We’re all together.” I politely told her, “Ok, but youre in our seats.” I felt bad because we’re blocking the row & she and her 2 kids are comfortably seated. I’m half wondering if someone is in the wrong theater because it's so jam packed.
Now she's acting all annoyed like I’m disturbing her. She points to the front of the theatre, insinuating I go sit there. If these were ANYTHING BUT the worst seats in the house I would have done so just because I’m nice like that, but it was literally the 3 seats on the very end of the front row.
“Sorry. But we'd like our seats.” She's basically ignoring me, periodically looking up annoyed like, "Why are you still here?" So I’M getting pissed and say, “No, Ma’am. I purchased THESE seats. THIS is where I want to sit.” Now her friend starts chiming in, “The kids want to sit together. Cant you switch?” “No. If I wanted to sit in the front row I would have bought those.”
Finally they get up all mad & her kid is crying & I’m thinking to myself, “WTF am I apologizing for? I didn’t do anything wrong?” As she bust past me she says, “Maybe you should apologize to my kids.” 😮
I was flabbergasted. But they FINALLY moved & we sat down in OUR seats so I thought that was the end of it. A few mins later she's back kneeled down in front of me attempting to guilt me again.
🙏 “Hey, I’m sorry the kids jus really want to sit together. Theyve been looking forward to this bla bla bla”
Because I’m a compassionate person I almost felt bad, but at the same time I’m thinking, “No! These are the seats I picked out too. Why should my kids suffer for this rude lady to accommodate her kids?”
I told her, “Sorry. If your seats were anywhere BUT the front row I’d gladly trade, but not today.”
She proceeds to sit there crouched down in front of me with this dumb expression as if she expects me to suddenly realize Im the ahole and change my mind. I repeated firmly, “NO WE WILL NOT BE MOVING SEATS” Then s
... keep reading on reddit ➡Anyone get looks at the dinner table expecting a prayer? It happened last night and in our house we toast and give thanks to the chef and 86 the religion.
It's always awkward. I'm not religious but I appreciate the moment where everyone comes together and gives thanks and begins eating at the same time.
I'm an atheist though so I give thanks to the chef for my meal. However, I cooked so I can't just thank myself. So it's a little awkward and forced at times because I don't always know what to say and I'm not a great public speaker and I wish I had a great toast.
Anyways, just looking for some ideas. When it's just my family it's no problem at all. We thank each other and enjoy our meal together. That's it. That's my post. Thanks for reading it. Cheers. Enjoy the meal!
The funeral director was asking us what we think Mum should wear in her casket.
Mum always loved to wear sarongs (fabric wraps that go around the torso and drape downward a bit like a long skirt would), so my uncle suggested that she wear a sarong in there.
The funeral director looked a bit confused, as did some of our family members, to which my uncle added:
"What's sarong with that?"
I started laughing like an idiot. He was proud of it too. The funeral director was rather shocked. We assured her, and our more proper relatives, that Mum would've absolutely loved the joke (which is very true).
His delivery was perfect. I'll never forget the risk he took. We sometimes recall the moment as a way help cushion the blows of the grieving process.
--Edit-- I appreciate the condolences. I'm doing well and the worst is behind me and my family. But thanks :)
--Edit-- Massive thanks for all the awards and kind words. And the puns! Love 'em.
I am sure all of us intern's have hit our respective specialties blues at this point. I've definitely hit mine in FM - where I feel as if I don't have much a role in medicine, where I feel as if what I do doesn't really matter in the grand scheme of things, or that what I do isn't really meaningful. It's a bit rough, I feel as if I have no identity, whereas residents in all other programs have a set identity and meaning.
I just, sort of exist. No one calls on FM for anything, we call on everyone else.
But I have had... Some recent patient interactions which were nice for me, in a moment of pretty melancholic burnout.
Someone I manage their HIV medications for - someone I only really met a few times at the beginning of residency (but is established in our clinic), and needs follow up with me, messaged me about some refills. I sent em in, also told him I need to see him for lab work as it's been a minute since we last saw each other. He agreed, but also told me he really appreciated I was his doc specifically, and was looking forward to seeing me again.
I saw an elderly patient with their daughter in clinic. Cellulitis. I got a message from the daughter as they were following up with another resident as I wasn't available for when I wanted him to be seen again. She just said she wanted me specifically to be in the loop as I was "the one taking care of my father". He ended up needing a short hospital stay (something I was already anticipating when I first met him), was completely fine. I called after his stint to see how he was doing - the daughter was really happy it was me that called.
I have a trans patient that I met recently that I manage her HRT for, who really only trusts me with her healthcare. She's really happy every-time she gets in with me. I've been working hard with preventative health with her, and she's been super receptive.
I get quite a number of young well childs with immigrant parents. When I talk to the kiddo, I'll sometimes start speaking in my native tongue. Not something the parents or the kid speaks, but I can tell the parents lighten up when I do, and the kids get a kick out of it.
I know I am just family medicine. I'm no surgeon, no emergency doc, no cardiologist. I ain't saving lives like them, I guess. I know most people don't really get what family medicine doctors do, but that it doesn't really matter either way cause they'd rather see a specialist in the first place - I'm just the middle man in the way. I know I'm in
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Tbh, I really don’t care what their thoughts are. It’s just surprising to me that everyone feels they are an expert on the topic and how “bad” it is to be induced. I remind them that this decision was made with my DOCTOR. I’ve even heard from my sisters friend whose a midwife how terrible a decision it is. Honestly, everyone can STFU.
The thing is, I know everyone single pregnant person gets some sort of slack from somebody on how they choose to deliver: hospital v birth center v home birth, medicated v unmediated, birth plan v no plan, c section v vaginal.
My point is why does literally the world think it’s okay to voice their opinions when safety of both us and the baby aren’t at issue?! It’s fucking annoying and RUDE. We get treated like we’re dumb fucks who can’t make educated decisions for ourselves.
My entire family just found out I am one of the sinful coffee drinkers, and their reaction on to this whole thing is just surreal and bizarre. I've been drinking coffee since I was 15. I used to only get it from the gas station or starbucks and mostly hid the evidence. But over the pandemic, I got tired of this and wanted to be able to brew my own. I'm an adult now, I live on my own, I should not have to be afraid of some Mormon boogeyman because of a choice in beverage.
So I bought a keurig and have been enjoying hot coffee every morning for over a year now. This last week, my mom visited and saw the sinful well of evil for the first time, and her reaction was just bizarre. She was floored when I told her that yes, I drink coffee. Like it was the most offensive thing she had ever seen. Now, my entire family is talking about it. My grandpa called me to try and lecture me about the evil's of coffee. My mom has told me how hard she is now praying for me. I've been told how i'll never be able to go to the temple or hear the holy ghosts words while I drink the bean water.
This whole thing is just surreal and one of the strongest reactions i've ever gotten from them. They did not react like this when they found out I was gay, they did not react like this when they learned I stopped going to church, hell even when I chose to not serve a mission they didn't react like this. Coffee above all else is the biggest risk to my eternal salvation? I have lived my entire life in this strange cult and I still will never understand it.
