I speak Atrocian
Knowing a slam book could not be replaced I tried consoling him, but I remembered digitalized it for him a year ago I quickly logged on to the PC to check if I had a backup. He quickly smiled and said it had a Blue cover, after about 10mins of searching I asked him if he remembered what I named the book. He burst out and said Facebook.
Frustrated I left the room to find my entire family sitting in the hall, and my mother goes "He did it to you too, didn't he"
And I'm here perplexed by the lengths a dad would go for his jokes.
I call it the MATT DAEMON!!!
She really likes debate, she runs a debate club. She likes chocolate cake. Her favourite animal is a tortoise. She is really good at playing instruments and she plays the bassoon. Anything will help, thank you!
because it's a late-text (latex)
It’s per DM
But I reply “NO I AM A CAPITALIST”
Think I'm going to delete the Kraft Cheese app.
Had potential to misfire but worked perfectly.
Also, the other day my wife left a Monster energy drink under her bed, and we waited for her to come and ask "ok who put this monster under my bed?"
All it says is 4:04.
How in the world do they expect me to have time to test it when I'm going past at 60 mph?
Woke up to a message, on our family chalkboard, left by my 15 y.o. daughter.
"Mornings are no fun when you have to get up at six or earlier."
I replyed:
"That's why they call it mourning."
I can already hear her eyes rolling.
http://i.imgur.com/kfJW6La.png
Yes yes I get it. You don't have to rub it in.
My wife sent me a picture of our baby. This was the exchange that followed:
Me: Look at those cheeks! They are huge!
Her: It is the angle, I am sure. The camera adds 10 pounds.
Me: How many cameras are you using?!
http://imgur.com/Tk1kbVL
http://imgur.com/6NGbMAy
My cousin: where's the punchline? XD
Me: Probably by the other drink lines
Her: what xD
Me: (fruit) Punch is a drink. I made a dad joke
Her: oh my lord
Me: yup.
Her: xD
Me: Also, you don't have to call me your lord
So the person's profile only talks about airplanes. I wanted to send a message totally jammed packed with airplane puns but I don't have that many. It's probably a fake profile but I still think it would be fun.
Here's what I have so far. Hey Girl. Most of the girls on this website are so 'plane' but you're the exception. I have a 'terminal' illness and hope to meet my copilot before I go. Just kidding. My health is 'A oK47'. I was just 'play'n' around. Just to let you know I have some baggage from some 'turbulence' in a previous relationship but Shirley I can get past it. My previous relationship taught me that two wrongs don't make a right. However, two Wrights made an airplane. I hope a new relationship can 'takeoff' with you though. I would be a great boyfriend. I have financial 'security' and could buy you anything you want with my 'visa'. Have you seen the movie, "Planes, Trains, and Automobiles"? It's really good, except for the train and automobile parts.
Think I'm going to delete the Kraft Cheese app.
