Hello, I’m looking for some help. My best good pal from high school is a tarantula dad. I made him this spiderweb glass piece for his birthday. I’m looking to put a solid pun in a card but haven’t come up with anything great. Does anyone have some good ideas? Any help is appreciated
My best friend works in the ER so I text jokes for him to tell his patients
He said it helps and leaves them all in stitches.
Where does dad keep all his best jokes
What does a zebra call his best friends?
Why does the best student stand outside his classroom everyday?
What do you say to a Koala to encourage him to beat his personal best on the bench press?
A man attends a funeral for his best friend. He approaches the grieving widow, gestures to the podium and asks; "May I say a word?" The widow responds "Of course.."
The man stands up and speaks "Plethora." and steps back down.
"Thank you..." says the Widow, "that really means a lot."
EDIT The responses here are incredible! 👌
I sent my best mate twins to stand next to each other and sing to him on his birthday
My best friend is bald but he still carries his comb with him
He just can't seem to part with it.
Seven Year Old Hit Me With His Best So Far
Driving home after a long week and had been driving for five hours or so on two lane roads through NM and AZ. Hour south of Petrified Forest and see four sheep on the side of the road.
Me: Son see those sheep? There must be a break in the fence and they are wandering away from their ranch.
Son: Well, that sounds baaaad.
Kevin James Franco in his best role yet!
I have a pet frog who's an aspiring comedian. I asked where he gets his best jokes from...
All he would say on the matter was "Reddit"
I asked my dad for his best joke and he said:
This lifeguard tried his best to rescue a hippie
But he was just too far out, man.
Why can’t Harry Potter tell the difference between his cooking pot and his best mate?
What does a skeleton call his best friend?
Captain America at his best
At his wedding, my buddy called me the worst best man he has ever seen.
John was the best liver surgeon in his hospital.
I guess you could say he always delivered.
How do you call when a person kills his best friend?
What did chewy spray on his best friend after he climbed out of the trash compactor?
Doesn't he need to change? I bet his best friend's name is penny.
What did the sniper say when asked why he couldn't kill his target when he realized it was his long lost best friend?
Today my mom turns 53, and it's tradition that my dad fills the kitchen with posters before she wakes up, wishing her a happy birthday. This year's were some of his worst (best) work.
Where does the best average golfer put his golf cart?
My best friend couldn’t come out to the pub with me tonight so his identical twin came instead.
My best friend just got dumped by his girlfriend in the YMCA...
Seems like their relationship isn't gonna workout
My Grand Pa tells the worst jokes but this is his best.
Grand Pa: What does Mr. Potato Head and Cuba have in common?
Me:expecting the worstWhat's that.....
Grand Pa: They both have a dictator.
I knew a guy who's best friend was a sea bird gifted by his dad's second wife.
It was his plover from another mother.
A farmer was trying his best to remove his cows from a nearby marijuana plantation
Mr. Time was ironically always late to his appointments, so to solve this his best friend made a bet with him that if he was late to his firstborn's birth, his friend would name him the most ridiculous name he could think of.
Luckily he arrived at the last second and named him Justin Time
Harry Potter can't tell the difference between his cooking pot and his best mate.
Harry Potter can't tell the difference between his cooking pot and his best mate.
Harry Potter can't tell the difference between his cooking pot and his best mate.
Why couldn't Harry Potter tell the difference between his cookpot and his best friend?
Why can't Harry Potter tell the difference between his cooking pot and his best friend?
During his wedding, my friend told me that I was the worst best man he has ever seen.
At his wedding, my buddy called me the worst best man he has ever seen.
At his wedding, my friend called me the worst best man he’s ever seen.
Harry Potter can't tell the difference between his cooking pot and his best friend...
Harry Potter can’t tell the difference between his cooking pot and his best friend.
At his wedding, my friend called me the worst best man he has ever seen.
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