A guy bought a lamp from Walmart, rubbed it and something popped out. "I am the Walmart Genie, you get one wish as long as it is not too difficult." "Can you build me a road to Hawaii, I don't like flying." "Way too hard, anything else?" "I want the Seattle Mariners to win the World Series."
"So, do you want two lanes or four lanes?"
A guy goes to the doc to get stitches in his leg. Way too nervous though, he calls off the procedure.
Frustrated, the doctor says, “fine, suture self!”
What’s the best way to get down from a camel?
You don’t, you get down from a duck!
What's Harry Potter's favorite way to get down a hill?
Walking.
J.K. ... Rowling
From my 11 year old
Whats the best way for a farmer to get a girlfriend?
A man has a goose on the top of a building. What is the easiest way for him to get down?
My two sons 5&8 are playing Minecraft this morning on survival. They are working hard together to build their mansion. I crossed the room in front of the TV to grab my phone as they are balanced high on a wall constructing a roof. My son screams out, “Dad get out of the way!”
I said, “You’re the ones blocking!”
Can anyone recommend a better way to remove ice from my windscreen? I used my Halfords discount card but could only get 20% off….
/r/CasualUK/comments/s30v…
I'm a line cook and looking for a way to get in on some of the extra cash that servers earn.
Got any tips you can share?
What's the best way to get rid of all the debris after a Russian missile blew up a satellite in space?
What's the best way to get Pikachu onto a train?
When Hurricane Dorian hits Florida, I'm going to check out my window for the clouds to get really grey. When they're at peak greyness I'll take a picture. That way Ill always have The Picture of Dorian Grey.
What’s the easiest way to get a panda to eat?
I was just reading this story about a guy who went through several tough breaks in life and couldn’t get ahead. One day he just stopped talking and his only way of communicating was through hand and body motion.......
Poor guy turned to a life of mime.
Having a way to get into your house is key
What happens when a snake doesn't get their way?
Square-dancing is a terribe way to get around.
What's the best way to get a tree drunk?
The best way to get a job in the lotion industry
I went to go get a haircut and they ended up cutting it way too short
I didn't like it, but it started to grow on me
"Son, lemme tell ya the best way to get a farm girl to consider dating you..."
What’s Harry Potters favourite way to get down a hill?
Walking? No… J.K. Rolling
What is Harry Potter's favorite way to get down a hill?
What is Harry Potters favorite way to get down a hill?
What is Harry Potter's favorite way to get down a hill? (Repost from r/dadjokes)
What’s Harry Potter’s favorite way to get down a hill? It’s walking.
What is Harry Potter's favorite way to get down a hill?
What's the fastest way for Harry Potter to get down a hill? Walking.
What's Harry Potter's way to get to the bottom of a hill?
Running
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JK! Rolling
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