If George Santos were a drag queen, what would his name be?
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︎ Jan 12 2023
I joined a drag race once...
I lost because I misunderstood the assignment and showed up in heels...
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︎ Jan 05 2023
This morning I saw a guy dragging a clam on a leash
And I thought, "It must be hard to walk with a pulled mussel"
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︎ Jun 30 2022
The other day I was shovelling the driveway with my son
Son: βDad donβt you have a shovel instead?β
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︎ Feb 05 2023
I went drag racing yesterday
It is brutal trying to run in 6 inch stilettos
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︎ Sep 22 2022
I tried catching fog the other day.
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︎ Nov 29 2022
Dragging Musician Arrested, Behind Bars
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︎ May 05 2022
I thought Iβd give drag racing a try out,
but running in heels is a nightmare
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︎ Jun 17 2022
A vulture went to the airport, dragging a fox behind him. Security stopped him and asked, "What's that?"
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︎ Apr 10 2022
Yesterday I tried Drag Racing
It was brutal running in those heels
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︎ Dec 15 2021
Mandalorians used to be coveted cheese makers
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︎ Jan 07 2023
I don't like people without feet.
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︎ Oct 21 2022
Whatβs a beeβs favorite hairstyle?
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︎ Dec 10 2022
Alright, it's time for a whirlwind of puns, get ready!
I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger, then it hit me! Never trust an atom, they make up everything! Long fairy tales do tend to drag on! I made a pun about the wind, but it blows! I had a pizza joke, but it was too CHEESY! I know a guy who collected candy canes, they were all in mint condition! Don't discuss infinity with your math teacher, they'll go on forever! The ability to fly would be so uplifting! My friend's bakery burned down, now it's toast! I was gonna get a brain transplant, but I changed my mind! german food jokes are the wurst! My local A.T.M stopped working and it doesn't make any cents! I miss my childhood friend and he misses me, but our aim is getting better! My friend found out she was colorblind, it came out of the orange for her! What did the duck say when she purchased some new lipstick? Put it on my bill! Towels can't tell jokes, they have dry senses of humor. What did the buffalo say to his son going away to college? Bison! What does a clock do when it's hungry? It goes back four seconds! What's the U.S.A's favorite soda?Mini soda! The bicycle couldn't be ridden because it was two tired! The car wasn't up for being driven because it was completely exhausted!
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︎ Dec 31 2022
Who would win if Santa's reindeer had a drag race?
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︎ Mar 05 2022
I really hate when movie franchises drag on for so long they end up nothing like the original. Take The Xmen, for example..
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︎ Oct 24 2021
the further adventures of Amanda Lynn
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︎ Sep 24 2022
I had a dachshund with no legs I named cigarette...
...Because every morning I'd take him out for a drag.
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︎ Jan 03 2023
I tried a drag race for the first time the other day.
It was brutal running in those heels.
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︎ Dec 24 2021
Boss: Tell me about suzanne Me: *takes a drag of cigarette* ah, the one that got away
Boss: You're a zoo keeper, none of them should get away
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︎ Mar 14 2021
I had a great childhood
I was always dragged across sharpened perforated metal.
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︎ Dec 06 2022
Where do you find a goat with no legs?
Right where you left it. GO ARMY!
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︎ Dec 11 2022
When the cowboys said that they needed someone to ride drag on the cattle drive, I volunteered.
But, why was I the only one wearing a dress?
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︎ Dec 15 2021
When a dadjoke becomes real. I offered my 2y old niece a hardcopy picture book.
She didn't open it, but started tapping and dragging the cover.
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︎ Dec 25 2022
Pun names with the name Manson
Hello! So my name is Manson and i'm trying to think of drag stage names including my name! I want it to be a pun so this is why im asking here.Extra points if its gothic!
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︎ Oct 05 2022
What animal is the strongest?
The snail. It can carry its house.
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︎ Sep 09 2022
Three men are on a boat. They have four cigarettes, but nothing to light them with. So they throw a cigarette overboard
the whole boat becomes a cigarette lighter.
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︎ Aug 07 2022
I know Bruce Lee has a vegan brother Brocco Lee, But...
I was surprised by his other brother.
Sudden Lee
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︎ Aug 05 2022
Conversations about mythical creatures can sometimes drag on
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︎ Oct 31 2020
Why do fishermen catch and sell so much tuna?
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︎ Sep 15 2022
I met my ex at a race track
Didnt quite work out, we just drifted away
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︎ Feb 04 2022
Has anyone watched a movie called "The Tractor"?
Me neither but I've seen the trailer
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︎ Oct 13 2022
People ask me why I named my dog "peeve"
I tell them because that's my pet peeve.
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︎ Oct 22 2022
Why did the golfer bring an extra pair of pants?
In case he got a hole-in-one!
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︎ Oct 11 2022
The heat this summer has been a real drag.
I guess thatβs what people mean by βsummer camp.β
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︎ Sep 07 2021
I finally cut ties with someone who was dragging me down
Mountain climbing with a friend is hard
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︎ Jun 06 2019
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesnβt matter, because it isnβt coming
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︎ Aug 23 2022
My wife is returning to the office and thus has to go back to wearing work outfits. One of her complaints was that wearing a bra was such a drag...
Iβve always found them to be very uplifting.
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︎ Jul 28 2020
Two bananas are sitting at a drag strip
When the light drops the first banana split, the other peeled out.
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︎ Jan 02 2021
what do you call a guy with no arms and no legs sitting in front of a door?
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︎ Jun 24 2022
This morning I saw a guy dragging a clam on a leash behind him...
It thought, it must be hard to walk with a pulled mussel.
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︎ Jun 29 2022
I tried drag racing the other day
It IS BRUTAL running in those heels
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︎ Dec 08 2021
I tried drag racing the other day
It is brutal running in those heels!
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︎ Jul 23 2021
I tried drag racing once
It was brutal running in heels
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︎ Jul 23 2021
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