My son tried to make me a rest bed with a built-in water station, but the water kept squirting out.
I smiled and told him, "Hey, it's the cot that founts!"
A man and his wife had a shed in their backyard. The neighbor asked which of them built it and they both replied that they had built it, leading to a massive argument.
It was a real He-Shed She-Shed situation.
Did you hear about the highway being built by the college in New Orleans?
I was in my room and saw 10 ants running frantically. I felt bad for them, so I built a house for them. This kinda makes me their landlord and that kinda makes them my...
The election is happening in November and Trump will be bragging about the 30 foot wall he built on the Mexican border.
But he probably should have made it much longer than that.
I bought a car built in 1485...
Witnessed in the wild, old dude talking to a sick little kid: Did you know that if your nose runs and your feet smell you're built upside down?
I'm in this new business of producing prayer mats with built in ejector seats...
So far the prophets are soaring.
Bilbo was surprised to wake up one morning and find a supermarket had been built in his garden.
It was an unexpected item in the Baggins area.
The guy was talking so much that he built the bike in the wrong order
I bought a tv that said “built in antenna” and I feel so stupid
I don’t even know where antenna is
I built a support to prop up my planner that helps keep track of the news reports about the robbery of 3-foot measuring devices from a boat repair place in West Michigan...
It's my Georgetown Township Shipyard Yardstick Stickup Update Datebook Bookend.
My friend built an aromatherapy vaporiser with a built-in brain scanner
Seems a bit out there, but makes scents when you think about it.
I bought a larger sink with a built in subwoofer.
My current one doesn't have enough basin.
Today I was in a pub that was built in 1132
[totally true story just happened to me:] *the setup* staying in an airbnb... another guest arrives, he is a neuro-surgeon from south korea... interviewing at UCSF - I built that hosptial, so said to him
Wow, neuro-surgeon huh... I'd like to pick your brain....
He did not get it...
(those type of pun opportunities dont come to mind that often...) ((another one bitches))
What do you call a city which is built in a cave?
My neighbour built a patio on his flat roof and now he sits and stares at us in our garden.
My wife walked in to see that our boys had built a fort in the living room. She shouted, ''PUT THOSE CHAIRS AND BEDSHEETS BACK!!"
I yelled, "YOU HEARD YOUR MOTHER!!" as I climbed out of fort…
Do you know why I allowed a police station to be built on my property out in the Styx?
Cause I've got too much crime on my lands.
Did you hear about the new synagogue built in the orchard?
I hear they have apple jews there.
The guy was talking so much that he built the bike in the wrong order
Bilbo was surprised to wake one morning & find a Tesco had been built next to his house. It was an unexpected item in the Baggins area.
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
