Brooklyn 99 Puns

The jokes are cheesy, forced and predictable, the characters and the writing is so forced and boring. Every episode feel to much the same and over all terrible acting from everyone involved. I watched it and never smiled once throughout the episodes I watched it’s so boring and basic and not worth the watch imo

I’m currently bingeing Brooklyn 99 and made it to Season 6, Ep 12 (Casecation).

It’s Jake and Amy’s one year wedding anniversary and she brings up kids. Turns out, the couple have never talked about kids. Amy wants them (soon) and Jake doesn’t (ever). Instead of trying to understand Jake, Amy proposes a structured debate.

The whole episode is cringey and (yes, I know they’re fake characters but) makes me want to hug Jake.

There’s no real resolution of them discussing things as adults. Jake gets in a high pressure bomb situation and realizes he “does well under pressure and will probably be a good dad because he’d be under pressure” ???????

End of episode. Yep, that’s it. I recognize it’s a sitcom. But it did such a good job of addressing other serious issues (such as infertility, racism and sexual assault) while being humorous but taking the issue seriously.

I just wish they had reflected childfree people correctly and not just as the cliché man who had a crappy dad and needs to be talked into realizing he can be a good one. Oh, and of course, since Jake had met “the right person,” he can see imagine having kids now.

I'll start.

YOU ARE UNDER ARREST FOR RUINING SOMETHING PERFECT

I say definitive because I am sure this has been done before - but this is the one. I will not apologise for anything I am about to say. Here is a ranking of (almost) every Brooklyn 99 character (only those who appeared in >1 episode)

52. Caleb John Gosche - The dude eats children. Don't question this placement.

51. Zeke - He's nasty to Terry which puts him bottom of the list, beaten only by a cannibal.

50. Darlene Linetti - Cheated on Lynn Boyle. Enough said.

49. John Kelly - Ugh. Just UGH.

48. Deputy Commissioner Podolski - Not only are you bland, but you raised a brat. Congrats Deputy Commissioner - ya boring.

47. Melanie Hawkins - Framed Jake and Rosa. Get in the bin.

46. Geoffrey Hoytsman - He was a bit of a shitter before his life was ruined, and it only got worse from there.

45. Warden Granville - Boring.

44. Olivia Crawford - I had to Google Olivia Crawford, because - who? Seriously, who?

43. Debbie Fogle - I mean, her episode was funny, but let's not pretend her character brought anything.

42. Bill Hummertrout - A bit too try-hard. Get your own friends Bill.

41. Vivian Ludley - The only person that can make 'Full Boyle' work is Boyle. She just made it weird.

40. Trudy Judy - Trudy should spend less time thinking about butts and more thinking about being less annoying.

39. Sheriff Reynolds - I really do laugh so hard every time I watch how this sheriff in Florida gets so horrified by two men kissing. But also, its the 21st Century. Reynolds sucks.

38. Teddy Wells - The man goes to jazz brunch. Oh and he proposes to ex girlfriends in the presence of his current girlfriend.

37. Detective Lohank - Who? JK, but really who cares about him. RIP Cinnamon though.

36. Bob Annderson - No but really Bob, who spells Annderson with 3 ns?

35. Veronica Hopkins - She held that grudge over being dumped a bit too long. The guys moved on, married, and has kids and you're still sulking? Girl.

34. Fire Marshal Boone - I'd take the pole over the stairs too.

33. Captain McGintley - Granted, we didn't see much of him, but we wouldn't have Holt if McGintley had stuck around, so I'm happy to put him near the middle of the list.

32. Maura Figgis - She pulled her own tooth out and threw it in someone's eye. Badass.

31. Oliver Cox - So weird, but his very rare cameos are so good. Also he's a writer on the show, so I feel he deserves recog

This might sound like the silliest thing ever, but I've been binge-watching Brooklyn 99 for a week (just started S4) since I have absolutely nothing to do. Jake's behaviour under stress has, I shit you not, changed my perspective on life: it shouldn't be taken that seriously! As a severe anxiety sufferer, this will be difficult to learn, but I'm pretty determined not to take life too seriously from now on. I think this is a huge lesson that the show passes on to its viewers and I really appreciate it for that. I'm an avid sitcom viewer but I've never really got that from any other show which is why I find it pretty cool. This might be obvious to some of you but when you're under a lot of stress and have anxiety on top of it, it becomes really easy to lose perspective.

Just thought I'd share this neat little thing. First time I've felt hope in a while!

Also, I love how they very subtlely incorporated Melissa's pregnancy in the last episodes of S3. It's pretty adorable how obvious it is.

I can’t imagine B99 ever being dated. Or the format seeming weird. But it’s going to happen. One day, in years to come, we will watch it and be like whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa?