A Bones Puns

A list of puns related to "A Bones"

I’m writing a movie about broken bones…

I just need a cast for it.

👍︎ 485
💬︎
👤︎ u/rszim94
📅︎ Feb 04 2023
🚨︎ report
I just finished my review of a restaurant where the food is served on bones

Eight on a scale of ten

👍︎ 7
💬︎
👤︎ u/CorbanzoBean69
📅︎ Nov 09 2022
🚨︎ report
What do you call a large collection of bones?

A skele- ton

👍︎ 52
💬︎
👤︎ u/ArmedPenguin47
📅︎ Jul 20 2022
🚨︎ report
I had a funny joke about bones...

I can't remember it, but it was humerus.

👍︎ 14
💬︎
👤︎ u/Tattoo1990
📅︎ Aug 31 2022
🚨︎ report
I made a comical play about bones

It's very humerus but it needs a large cast

👍︎ 5
💬︎
👤︎ u/ManOfManyWives
📅︎ Aug 31 2022
🚨︎ report
Whenever you hear someone starting to tell a joke about bones...

You know it's going tibia good one.

👍︎ 27
💬︎
👤︎ u/RiceCakeMan0
📅︎ Apr 08 2022
🚨︎ report
There must be a ton of people buried here… look at all these bones! reddit.com/gallery/ovc30v
👍︎ 13
💬︎
👤︎ u/MathGuyTony
📅︎ Jul 31 2021
🚨︎ report
I recently got into a heated argument with my German neighbour. I insulted him, to which he replied “Sticks und stones may break my bones aber vurds can never hurt me!”

So I threw a sausage at him.

👍︎ 10
💬︎
👤︎ u/Dongwaffler
📅︎ Jan 12 2022
🚨︎ report
What do you call a coffin with bones?

Occupied.

👍︎ 10
💬︎
👤︎ u/Awkward-Ad6455
📅︎ Nov 22 2021
🚨︎ report
How many bones are there in a human hand?

just a handful.

👍︎ 24
💬︎
👤︎ u/cthulhouette
📅︎ Jun 29 2021
🚨︎ report
What is a skinny skeleton’s bones made out of?

Bone narrow!

👍︎ 26
💬︎
👤︎ u/RunningSomeMo
📅︎ Feb 21 2021
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the cannibal who threw a pile of funny bones into a boiling cauldron?

He made himself a laughing stock

👍︎ 38
💬︎
👤︎ u/asiers
📅︎ Aug 26 2020
🚨︎ report
How many bones are in a human body?

Hopefully, all of them.

👍︎ 25
💬︎
👤︎ u/patty4204
📅︎ Sep 30 2020
🚨︎ report
The Vatican found two bones on a cadaver with offensive carvings on them.

They were blasfemurs.

👍︎ 6
💬︎
👤︎ u/TheAzrael2013
📅︎ Jun 01 2021
🚨︎ report
They found bones of a homisapien who lived before the ice age. Some say he was the first hipster...

since he lived on the earth before it was cool.

👍︎ 17
💬︎
👤︎ u/gunjeepcigarbeer
📅︎ Dec 07 2020
🚨︎ report
We found a dolphin skeleton on the beach, so we ground the bones to make some bread...

It was all-porpoise flour.

👍︎ 27
💬︎
👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ May 07 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a dog who digs for bones?

A Bark-aeologist

👍︎ 21
💬︎
👤︎ u/kickypie
📅︎ Nov 29 2020
🚨︎ report
My archeologist buddy invited me to a party. Apparently the entertainment was looking for leg bones in his backyard.

It was quite the shindig

👍︎ 10
💬︎
👤︎ u/Chateau512
📅︎ Jun 26 2020
🚨︎ report
Ever heard a bones joke?

They're quite humerus

👍︎ 8
💬︎
👤︎ u/anaraparana
📅︎ Oct 06 2020
🚨︎ report
I asked the guy at the meat counter for a couple of t-bones, but he gave me some sirloins instead.

He later apologized for his mis-steak.

👍︎ 6
💬︎
👤︎ u/HeyWhatsItToYa
📅︎ Jul 17 2020
🚨︎ report
There is a German shepherd next door that keeps burying bones in my yard, and taking poops on my flower bed.

His dog is not as bad.

👍︎ 2
💬︎
👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Dec 29 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a collection of bones made out of kitchenware?

A skillet-ton

👍︎ 2
💬︎
👤︎ u/WhatWouldBenLinusDo
📅︎ Aug 23 2020
🚨︎ report
I just invested in a company that will pay me to keep t-bones and rib-eyes in my freezer to sell when the market improves...

I'm a steak-holder.

👍︎ 6
💬︎
👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Apr 24 2020
🚨︎ report
Captain Kirk goes to Sickbay. "Bones, I have a problem."

McCoy says, "What is it, Jim?"

Kirk replies, "I can't stop singing 'Delilah' and 'The Green Green Grass of Home'. What's wrong with me?"

McCoy doesn't even stand up. "You've got 'Tom Jones Syndrome', Jim."

Kirk looks shaken, "Dear God. Is it rare?"

McCoy smiles, "It's not unusual."

👍︎ 3
💬︎
👤︎ u/Crash_86
📅︎ May 02 2018
🚨︎ report
My wife decided to put a bunch of leftover chicken bones in the crockpot so we can make a lot of soup at home as this thing drags on

When it was done she said "we're all stocked up!"

👍︎ 2
💬︎
👤︎ u/NewUser579169
📅︎ Mar 30 2020
🚨︎ report
My dog has a song she likes for rawhide bones.

Gnaw, gnaw, gnaw, gnaw

Gnaw, gnaw, gnaw, gnaw

Hey, hey, hey.

Goodbye.

👍︎ 11
💬︎
👤︎ u/urbanek2525
📅︎ Oct 08 2019
🚨︎ report
It’s the end of work on Friday, it’s been a long week, and all my bones are just like the capital city of the Holy Roman Empire.

They’re Aachen.

👍︎ 2
💬︎
👤︎ u/Dymmesdale
📅︎ Feb 14 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the high archaeologist say to his colleagues upon discovering a trove of dinosaur bones?

Oh wow! Dig it, man!

👍︎ 2
💬︎
👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Jan 17 2020
🚨︎ report
How many bones are in a human hand?

A handful.

👍︎ 111
💬︎
👤︎ u/416b
📅︎ Sep 30 2020
🚨︎ report
How many bones are in a hand?

A handfull.

👍︎ 8
💬︎
👤︎ u/0rreborre
📅︎ Mar 09 2021
🚨︎ report
How many bones are in a human hand?

A handful.

👍︎ 596
💬︎
👤︎ u/Subscribe_to_Sam24
📅︎ Jan 19 2019
🚨︎ report
How many bones are in a human hand?

A handful

👍︎ 142
💬︎
👤︎ u/abeneldp
📅︎ Jun 07 2019
🚨︎ report
How many bones are in a hand?

A handful

👍︎ 28
💬︎
👤︎ u/Mopi_is_short
📅︎ May 18 2020
🚨︎ report
How many bones are in a human hand?

A handful

👍︎ 537
💬︎
👤︎ u/DaveDeveDiveDoveDuve
📅︎ Sep 15 2018
🚨︎ report
How many bones are in a human hand

A handful.

👍︎ 5
💬︎
👤︎ u/matjes003
📅︎ Sep 30 2018
🚨︎ report
How many bones are there in a hand?

a handfull

👍︎ 9
💬︎
👤︎ u/79thatemptyeeeeeeeet
📅︎ Feb 13 2019
🚨︎ report
How many bones are in a human hand?

A handful.

👍︎ 5
💬︎
👤︎ u/ecodrew
📅︎ Jan 31 2019
🚨︎ report
I have never heard a joke about bones that wasn't humerus
👍︎ 5
💬︎
👤︎ u/dubeykeebler
📅︎ Mar 25 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a dog who digs for bones?

A Bark-aeologist.

👍︎ 47
💬︎
👤︎ u/BigSpermingWhale
📅︎ Feb 06 2016
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.