What do you call a depressed man with a robotic arm?
I mean a deaf person with one arm the other day...
The conversation was pretty one-sided.
A man with a broken arm made a joke. Everyone started laughing. He was...
I got in a car wreck and lost my left arm, but don’t worry...
I’m all right.
buh-dum-tsss
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in a pool?
A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says, “A beer please, ..."
"... and one for the road."
It's the little things that count (also a T-rex's arms)
https://www.instagram.com/standup.trex/
https://preview.redd.it/9449vyyyj4f61.png?width=620&format=png&auto=webp&s=4f5d46a86d95447af0958da58a8583a00398e36f
Watching the Superbowl and they mentioned Brady has a good arm.
Bet he could really throw a Tom ato
A women was getting petrol at a petrol station and spilt some on her arm.
She rubbed the petrol off and drove away. While on the road, she lit a cigarette and her arm caught on fire. Concerned, she started waving her arm out the side of the car.
Amongst all this, the police pulled her over. "What am I under arrest for?" The officer replied "for having a firearm"
So I’m at dinner with the fam, telling the joke about what the kid with no arms got for Christmas (we still don’t know because he hasn’t opened them yet)...I set it up...a friend of mine at work has a kid...no arms...and deliver the punchline...
And my 10 year old son, completely deadpan, tells me
‘Dad, I knew that story wasn’t real because you don’t have any friends’
👻👻💀💀☠️☠️ It took me a solid 5 minutes to stop laughing.
I have achieved Dad level 10 at raising my kids
Did you hear about the guy that walked into a bar with a chunk of asphalt under his arm?
He asked the bartender for a beer, and one for the road.
My brother lost his left arm and left leg in a terrible auto accident.
What did the seal with a broken arm say to the shark?
"Do not consume if seal is broken."
I meet guy with a deer on the end of each arm.
A mime in my town was arrested yesterday after breaking his left arm in a bar fight.
He still has the right to remain silent.
I went to the doctor because my arm hurt. He took an Xray and told me I have a humerus fracture.
Personally, I didn't find it funny at all.
We are doing a jigsaw puzzle of the human anatomy, and I hid the upper arm.
Nobody else finds this humerus.
A dog stole a skeletons left arm and left leg.
It’s ok, he’s all right now.
What do you call a dude with no arms and no legs who...
...hangs on a wall?
Art
...goes for a swim?
Bob
...sits on a porch?
Matt
...lies in a ditch?
Phil
What do you call a guy with no arms or legs and he’s floating in your pool?
Bob.
(It’s padre’s birthday and he just dug that one out of the depths of his memory...)
What do you call a guy with one arm and one leg, who sits in front of your door?
Did you hear about the poker player who lost his arm and got a prosthetic replacement?
He's finding it hard to deal with.
A man walks into a fish and chip shop with a cod under his arm...
He says to the bloke behind the counter,
“Do you do fishcakes?”
The man behind the counter nods his head and smiles.
“Yeah mate.”
Customer points to the cod under his arm.
“Better make him one then mate, it’s his birthday.”
I feel sad for those who have a prosthetic arm.
Because they lack a humerus bone in their body.
When you see a person person at the bus stop with no arms and legs don’t start a conversation with...
“Hi, how are you getting on?”
I have three different levels of tan on me. One level is my arms and legs from wearing a shirt and shorts. The next level is from not wearing a shirt at the beach. And the last is under my shorts.
I got in a bad accident and the doctors had to remove my left leg and arm
At that moment I realized I had nothing left to lose
Advice for a broken arm
I told my doctor that I broke my arm in two places. He told me to stop going to those places.
A British man decided to pick up a hitchhiker with no arms, 1 leg and 3 heads.
He says: " 'ello 'ello 'ello, you look 'armless, hop in!"
The weatherman for our local TV channel broke both his arms and his legs in a car accident.
He is calling in from the hospital with his four casts.
Some asshole cut off both my arms and a leg a while ago. But it's ok...
...I don't hold crutches.
I got an arm transplant at a great price yesterday.
It was discounted at the second hand store.
What do you call s man with no arms and legs in a swimming pool?
What do you call a depressed man with a robotic arm?
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sitting in a pool?
What do you call a deaf man with a robotic arm
A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm.
He shouts, “A beer please! And one for the road!”
A mime in my town was arrested yesterday after breaking his left arm in a bar fight.
He still has the right to remain silent.
A man walks into a bar with a chunk of asphalt under his arm.
The man says "One whiskey for me and one for the road"
A mime in my town was arrested after he got into a bar fight and broke his left arm.
He still has the right to remain silent.
What is a guy with no arms, no legs, to the wall?
A mime in my town was arrested yesterday after he broke his left arm in a bar fight.
He still has the right to remain silent.
What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of the sea?
In my town they arrested a mime that got into a bar fight and broke his left arm...
He still has the right to remain silent...
What do you call A bloke with no arms or legs floating in the sea?
A mime in my town was arrested yesterday after he broke his left arm in a bar fight.
He still has the right to remain silent.
An arm told a joke to the other arm
The other arm found it very humerus
A man walks into a bar with a piece of asphalt under his arm and asks the barman....
“Can I have a drink for me and one for the road”
A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says...
"Pint please, and one for the road
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