I was going through my twitter account, and remembered I write puns when I have writer’s block. Hopefully this counts.
I can't remember how to write 1, 1000, 51, 6 and 500 in Roman numerals.
I bought a pen that can write underwater.
It can write other words as well...
There's been a lot of things that I disagree with on this subreddit so I'm going to write it an open letter.
My new pen is amazing, it writes underwater
It writes other words too.
My therapist told me to write letters to everyone who’s hurt me then burn them.
I’ve done that. Now what do I do with the letters?
I know a bit dark, but all in good fun :)
Why cant you write "Dark" with a C?
Because you can't C in the dark!
(My little brother told me this one and was really proud of himself lol)
I have a friend who writes music about sewing machines.
He's a singer songwriter...or sew it seams.
I decided to take a sharpie and write F5 on my pillow.
Had the most refreshing sleep of my life.
I was going to write a long story about winter but it was too cold
So I just wrote a summary instead
What do fence builders write online?
What does a cat writes on ?
My friend has just published his book about clocktowers, exactly ten years after beginning to write it.
“Hi my name is Koo, // I like to write poems that use, // five, seven, five style.”
I'm thinking about changing my spelling habits when I write stories to the British spelling of words like colour or honour.
I feel like it'll be more immersive, because it really puts u into the narrative.
Asked my wife while trying to write the date "Eleven nine?"
"Forget never."
She's real proud of herself for this one.
How does a backwards Poet write?
How do witches write their spells?
What kind of music do instrumentalist(s) write in bed ?
Sheet music
and someone comes to make a cover
A guy writes sends an email to a grocery service: "a nut for a jar of tuna"
He gets an email back saying: "you have one chance to turn this around or we'll call the cops"
So he writes back: "a nut for a jar of tuna"
It’s often forgotten that the publication of “Hamlet” was delayed by several months because Shakespeare couldn’t figure out what pencil to write it with
My son got detention for misbehaving in P.E. The P.E. teacher told him he had to write an essay in the form of a report about a cricket match and he couldn’t leave until he’d finished it.
Less than 5 minutes later my son handed the essay in to the bemused teacher, and left detention.
The essay simply said:
“rain stopped play”
Why did the poet use a crayon to write a sonnet?
He wanted to wax eloquent.
I want to write a letter to the World Health Organisation, but I'm a little stuck...
I'm unsure as to whether I should write "To WHO" or "TO WHOM?"
I'm trying to write a song about boxing
But I just can't come up with the right hook
My late dad was so proud of me, I decided to write a book about it…
I have a new pen that can write underwater, and in a volcano and on the north pole.
It can write other things too.
My daughter is learning how to write numbers...
She said to my wife, “Mommy, I don’t remember how to do a 2.”
So I yelled out, “You just sit on the potty and push!”
They both ignored me. So now you all get to appreciate my joke instead.
Pirate Ship Captain: I am desperate. Can someone tell me how to write the number 2 in Roman numerals?
Whenever we order middle eastern food I make sure to carefully write down what everyone wants.
I'd falafel if I messed anyone's order up.
I don't like it when you write someone a letter and they don't even bother to reply...
...so you end up having to keep the hostage
People who write with fountain pens exude big bic energy.
Why did Karl Marx write in all lowercase letters?
Because he hated capitalism
I tried making a list of the best quality kevlar vests but I didn't know why I can't write them
Then I realized it was because they were bulletproof
What do you get when you write mispelled backwards?
Matthew McConaughey’s new book is a great read, but he almost didn’t write it…
After some convincing from family and friends he finally said, “I’ll write, I’ll write, I’ll write.”
I finally know why people write their Job title below their names in cards/placards.
So that they can say this job is beneath me.
I can’t remember how to write 1, 1000, 51, 6, and 500 as Roman Numerals.
My therapist told me to write letters to everyone who’s hurt me then burn them.
I’ve done that. Now what do I do with the letters?
I was going to write a long story about winter but it was too cold
So I just wrote a summary instead
Just bought a pen that writes underwater
I can't remember how to write 1, 1000, 51, 6 and 500 in Roman numerals.
I was going to write a long story about winter but it started getting too cold
So I just wrote a summery instead
I bought a pen that can write underwater
... it can write other words as well.
I was going to write a long story about winter but it started getting too cold
So I just wrote a summery instead
Scientists invented a pen that writes underwater.
It writes lots of other words too.
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