My friend, while driving through the mountains watching the leaves change: I love the winter. All the naked trees.

Me: Yeah, you can see all their knotty parts.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/baileywiki
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2020
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Why do vegans love winter?

This is the time of the year when you can eat carrots from snowmen for free.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/notseefun
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2019
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Who loves to live in the present during winter?

The s-now-man

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pdonkey
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2019
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I love winter so much.

It's so cool.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Franhound
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2019
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A great fall indeed
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πŸ‘€︎ u/samiuddin_anwer
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2020
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A Russian named Rudolph was telling his wife about the lovely winter rain.

"No, honey, that is snow."

"My sweet, that is a wonderful rain," he said.

"You are not smart. That is snow!" she exclaimed.

He replied, "Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Papa-Dam
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2016
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I was passing by my son's bedroom and was astonished to see the bed was nicely made and everything was picked up…

Then, I saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow.

It was addressed, 'Dad'.

With the worst premonition, I opened the envelope and read the letter, with trembling hands:

"Dear, Dad.

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you.

I had to elope with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.

I've been finding real passion with Stacy.

She is so nice, but I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercing's, tattoos, her tight motorcycle clothes and because she is so much older than I am.

But it's not only the passion, Dad.

She's pregnant.

Stacy said that we will be very happy.

She owns a trailer in the woods, and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter.

We share a dream of having many more children.

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone.

We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people in the commune for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want.

In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so that Stacy can get better.

She sure deserves it!

Don't worry Dad, I'm 15, and I know how to take care of myself.

Someday, I'm sure we'll be back to visit so you can get to know your many grandchildren.

Love, your son, Joshua.

P.S. Dad, none of the above is true.

I'm over at Jason's house.

I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the school report that's on the kitchen table.

Call when it is safe for me to come home!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2017
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As my 17yo son is telling me about his new girlfriend, whose name is Autumn...

I said 'be careful, she might leave you.'

He did not get it at first, so I had to repeat myself a couple of times...but I would have done that anyway.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Drumlin
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2015
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More Teacherdad Material

I work as a special education teacher. I'll admit to not being a dad, but I hope I'm well on my way.

Aide: "I'm so excited (note sarcasm). I get to visit my in-laws in Missouri over winter break."

Teacherdad: I hear there are a lot of people visiting Missouri these days.

Student: "Why?"

Teacherdad: ...Missouri loves company.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/martimeryard
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2013
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