SERIOUS: This subreddit needs to understand what a "dad joke" really means.

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/anywhereiroa
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2022
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Arch Linux Laptop Optimization Guide For Practical Use

Everything I mention in this post will be taken from the Arch Wiki this guide is geared towards new Arch Linux users who want a practical laptop like they did on Windows or Mac OS. This guide can be applied to other distros not just Arch.

Everything I'll show is biased towards my personal laptop with an Intel CPU and GPU, I'll be leaving guides for AMD and NVIDIA devices where it's needed so people with that hardware aren't left out.

For laptops with dual GPU's if you want the most battery life and best thermals you'll want to switch to your iGPU for normal tasks, I left Arch Wiki guides for how to do that at the bottom of this post.

I wont be using any power saving packages in this guide, because I don't like them and feel I can achieve better results without them even though they do a lot of similar things you'll see here. (If you do have any power saving packages installed uninstall all of them if you plan on following this guide as they may cause conflicts)

I'll continue updating this guide if I find anything new or if new technologies come out to improve efficiency.

Also small rant at the bottom of my post and basically my hope for Linux laptop support in the future.

Step 1. Kernel and Drivers

When picking what kernel to use (Latest or LTS) Latest will mostly likely have better performance and battery especially on newer hardware, LTS will have better stability and reliability. (personally I use the LTS)

run sudo pacman -S linux-firmware if you haven't installed it already it.

Here is the Arch Wiki page to the Linux kernel.

Here is the Arch Wiki Guide for NVIDIA drivers.

Here is the Arch Wiki Guide for AMD drivers.

Here is the Arch Wiki Guide for Intel drivers.

Step 2. Enable Wayland

Wayland has been shown have slight power saving compared to X.org it also makes my laptop run much smoother. For KDE you'll want to run sudo pacman -S plasma-wayland-session (For NVIDIA it's different check the wiki) then select it from your login screen, on Gnome it should be enabled by default. For other desktop environments I'll leave the Arch Wiki page.

Wayland is not a requirement for this guide I personally just found it much better to use.

For KDE

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/WinterSniper_0
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2022
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Blind Girl Here. Give Me Your Best Blind Jokes!

Do your worst!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Leckzsluthor
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2022
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Guide on how to actually play Drow Ranger in Aghanim's Labyrinth

I've seen a lot of guides/builds for her and most of this I hugely disagree on. Guides seem to focus on her Markmanship aura which I think is the wrong way to play her.

Reason being:

  1. Building around this will make you completely team reliant. You will be nothing but an aura bot. If you don't have competent teammates, you are building towards failure when you reach PB and they won't deliver.
  2. If you rely on your Marksmanship active to deal damage, (most guides consider Glacial Blast THE BEST shard for her) you have a huge downtime and you're pretty much useless everytime its on cooldown, which is 90% of the time.

I almost exclusively play only Drow Ranger in Aghanim's Labyrinth, and I've been playing ALOT (I already unlocked all blessings by amassing fragments just from grinding games and not from the weekly bonuses)

In this post I will share how I play Drow and actually carry the runs on your own, and if you are doubtful how viable this is, I have cleared APEX MAGE several times with this. No bullshit for Magician/Apprentice only builds like some guides I see. This is tested and proven on the highest difficulty, multiple times.

I am pretty active on the r/dota2 discord Aghs Lab channel as "anykey", and I've helped multiple people clear Apex mage runs with this build.

Her TIER 1 shards are:

WAVE OF ARROWS (15% chance to proc Multishot on frost arrow attack) - This is your god tier wave clear shard. If you have this, you can solo clear most mobs with constant kiting, as opposed to actual multishot where you have to stop and channel. The most important aspect of this shard however, is this will be your built-in crit everytime it procs. It's basically an AOE Crit, a single proc actually deals more damage than 1 arrow wave when you cast Multishot. When you have this shard, focus on % Multishot Damage and + Arrow common shards. The stronger your multishot is, the stronger your "crit" is.

OVERWHELMING POWER (Get stacking damage/ms for every enemy hit with multishot) - This synergizes really well with Wave of Arrows because when it procs, this is also applied. In the late game you will have constant Overwhelming Power stacks uptime and constant knockback.

BITTERLY COLD (Hypothermia in vanilla Dota, 4 stacks of frost arrows that deal dps) - This is your boss/captain killer. If you get this shard, you can focus on Frost Arrow damage and Frost Arrow duration, and you deal huge damage over time to bosses and captains. The good thi

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zetsupetsu
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2022
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French fries weren’t cooked in France.

They were cooked in Greece.

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2022
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This subreddit is 10 years old now.

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/frexyincdude
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2022
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You've been hit by
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mordrathe
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2022
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I'm sick of you guys posting dumb wordplay in here for awards and upvotes.

Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/diggitygiggitycee
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2022
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Dropped my best ever dad joke & no one was around to hear it

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies πŸ˜‚

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Vegetable-Acadia
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2022
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What starts with a W and ends with a T

It really does, I swear!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PsychedeIic_Sheep
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2022
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Why did Karen press Ctrl+Shift+Delete?

Because she wanted to see the task manager.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Eoussama
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2022
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Heyo fellow Ekko enthusiasts im 4Sekkonds, I reached Rank 1 Ekko EUW & World stat wise and this is my thorough guide to share with yall my thoughts and ideas when it comes to gameplay, runes and builds, AMA!

For those who have already seen me here before, i was an aspiring pro last season and after playing for a whole year and despite seeing how much i did improve inside that "industry" and environment, I decided to sit back and take a different approach this year.
Im back to being a full on otp with the ambition of reaching the top of the ladder with our boy and devoting myself to becoming the best possible Ekko player I can be, SO without further ado lets wrap up the introductions and go straight to the guide!

This season so far ive already reached Grandmaster and Challenger is the next stop!To further elucidate anyone who wants to check out games and matchups for context, here is my op gg! https://euw.op.gg/summoner/userName=4Sekkonds

https://preview.redd.it/vvtkn601cgc81.png?width=788&format=png&auto=webp&s=c4cc4e105e7754e1705434f5eb211f81794a1441

https://preview.redd.it/ff4nvmgubgc81.png?width=1274&format=png&auto=webp&s=48c835773e384880aa416f569a8edb0db2dd699a

Runes:
When it comes to runes, there's a wide variety of them one can choose from. Regardless of existing a more staple way of playing a champion optimally, I highly believe that the craft behind ur playstyle is the most important thing when it comes to truly enjoying ur champion to the fullest. I have 3 rune setups (4 if u count on jungle rune page), each ill explain why and how i decide my take before the game starts

Electrocute Ekko (Standard Page)

This is the most standard page I rune in most matchups, its as straightforward as whether im unaware of what matchup im facing (in case theres flex picks in enemy team) or in cases where im against ranged matchups where i feel the need to have a more reliable source of dmg to trade and create more dominance in lane to build up that snowball.U can run sorcery second with absolute focus and gathering storm instead of inspiration tree. Its also very viable and I recommend using it if it fits u more however due to personal preference it is a lot easier for me to secure through the laning phase with this setup, which is the hardest state of the game for Ekko.
One last note, in case ure not very familiar with minion dematerializer the way u wanna idealize it is by having it 6|9|0 (1 stack on melee minions, 2 stacks on caster minions, 0

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KinkkiMan
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2022
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So 2 trees got arrested in the town I live...

Heard they've been doing some shady business.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/K1ll47h3K1n9
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2022
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I was almost upset that my coffee tasted like dirt today

but then I remembered it was ground this morning.

Edit: Thank you guys for the awards, they're much nicer than the cardboard sleeve I've been using and reassures me that my jokes aren't stale

Edit 2: I have already been made aware that Men In Black 3 has told a version of this joke before. If the joke is not new to you, please enjoy any of the single origin puns in the comments

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πŸ‘€︎ u/scarf_spheal
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2022
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What is the scariest tree?

BamBOO!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/K1ll47h3K1n9
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2022
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What is a a bisexual person doing when they’re not dating anybody?

They’re on standbi

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Toby-the-Cactus
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2022
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How eggs-traordinary
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rix27_
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2022
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An extensive guide to all things Harrow

Image for reddit's preview thingy but also it looks nice

Introduction

Originally, I wanted to get this guide out before Harrow Prime’s release with The New War, but opted to go more in-depth than initially planned completely overboard, and ended up taking a break from writing it when U31 dropped. Since then I've worked on it gradually, and now here it is! - all 11 pages of it (what have I done).

One particular introductory note - Harrow is often referred to as a "selfish support"; he needs to chain enemies and score kills himself to keep his kit running, and to provide his health/energy restoration. If there aren't enough enemies around, be it from 'competition' with allies or low spawn rates in general, it can become a struggle to do so. While this can definitely be an issue at times, it varies significantly between different mission types and squads, and is generally less of an issue than it's made out to be.

Don't let it deter you from what Harrow has to offer! :)

Don't let the length of this guide deter you either - I've gone a touch overboard in the depth department here, but what his abilities do and how to use them is covered in the first 2 sections. The rest is all about build options, weapon choices, and additional guidance. Feel free to use this guide more like a guide book, and just look at the sections you're interested in.

The first section is a primer, for those that don’t know anything about (or are not familiar with) Harrow’s abilities.

Primer

Passive - doubled overshields cap (+1200 up to +2400), and 100% full energy at the start of missions (as of U31).

Starting off with his third ability, Thurible, his energy source. Casting it once begins channeling energy (at a base 15% conversion rate) into a charge. Casting it a second time (or running out of energy) turns the charge into a buff for 35s, shown in the UI. When Harrow scores kills, the displayed value is restored as energy to Harrow and nearby allies within 20m, which is shown by a ring of energy around Harrow. Headshot kills restore 4x the energy.

Next up is his first ability, Condemn. When cast, a wave is sent forward for 20m which expands horizontally as it travels, and chains any enemies it hits in place for 6s. Each enemy chained restores 150 points of Harrow’s shields, building into overshields. Enemies chained

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Prof_Blocks_007
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2022
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My ten-year-old daughter came up with this at dinner tonight: What do you get if put a copy of Macbeth on top of a dictionary?

A play on words.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ah1887
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2022
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My son, Luke, loves how I named our kids after Star Wars characters...

My daughter, Chewbecca, not so much.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2022
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Geddit? No? Only me?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/shampy311
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2021
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Steve JOBS would have made a better President than Donald Trump

But that’s comparing apples to oranges

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ok-Ingenuity4838
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2022
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Positive Thoughts/Outlook on the Latest Changes amidst the hate, but then again, it's the RIGHT Direction

Amidst the hatred, I feel like sharing my optimistic views on the new rework and rebutt some of the complaints of players, again. Her gameplay has changed and became even more interesting. Now that the meta pretty much revolves around mobility champs and burst damage, her kit now totally makes sense.

She got her utility power back like the old days! Cheers. It's not the best, but its a strong rework to what Janna is supposed to be, objectively speaking. Utility will always work on both offensive and defensive. Take Bard for example. Her reworked utility is now a mix of a more reliable catcher and a more reliable enchanter.

1.) Why reliable catcher? Her close-to-unavoidable speedy Q. Her Q is now less reliant on luck/gamble. You can make more AOE picks without having to go close and worry that it can be intercepted, cleansed or reduced by tenacity. All it takes is a good foresight on where they are up to 3 seconds and you're heavily rewarded. Players should now be wary of her tornadoes inside and outside lane. Not to mention Glacial works so well with increased slow because of the new Heal and Shield Power passive proc of E.

Old Q is relatively less to achieve these. The slow travel speed affects your 'up to 3s prediction'. The instant Q is even more slower that you can't close the gap, given that champions nowadays have kits/damage to followup a Janna disengage. You have to account a few more milliseconds of noticeable travel and the enemy's reaction time and where they might dodge if they react to it. Let's face it, with the old speed, you can react to the tornado even if it was not obvious. You have to plan more that your nado can sneak to the area without it being so obvious. That's why it takes mind games to land it but has little reward on average*. I'm saying on average. This may not be the case anymore on the reworked Janna Q.

People are saying that the Q speed buff just reduces her skillcap now. It's a yes but mostly, no. The rework now forces Janna to have the responsibility to land her tornadoes to be useful and prove that she can effectively catch/peel (like some catcher engage supports do as part of their utility), now that her lane bully powers have calmed down. She is now reliant to make good foresights with it, and good decision making to use it, because it is a double-edged sword ability, meaning a single ability that is now effective on both peeling and picking and she has to choose between the two.

With champion abilities nowa

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/yuukiyoshida
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2022
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I wanna hear your best airplane puns.

Pilot on me!!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Paulie_Felice
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2022
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E or ß?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Amazekam
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2022
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Which actor drives the least?

Christopher Walken

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TR1771N
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2022
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What did Spartacus say when the lion ate his wife?

Nothing, he was gladiator.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/rj104
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2022
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Pun intended.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sharmaji1301
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2022
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No spoilers
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Onfour
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2022
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Should we create an English word for the 'day after tomorrow'?

Or would that be too forward thinking?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/afunkysquirrel
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2022
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Covid problems
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πŸ‘€︎ u/theincrediblebou
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2022
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These aren't dad jokes...

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lance986
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2021
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Update 30.9.0: Prime Resurgence

Source

Update 30.9.0: Prime Resurgence

A Prime Resurgence is upon us…

Coming November 16 for a limited time, we are launching Prime Resurgence! This event provides Tenno with a schedule of Vaulted Prime releases. The impending War grows near day by day, Tenno. A new (yet familiar face to some?), Varzia Dax, has an opportunity to fortify your Arsenal with Prime items that have long been Vaulted.

We first announced that we are looking at running a Prime Vault event of sorts on Devstream 156 - and Prime Resurgence is just that! It is our first stab at offering an alternative to Prime Vault: A one-stop shop to gain access to Vaulted Prime content and Relics with a fully transparent schedule to allow players time to plan.

Varzia, a Dax from the Old War, will appear in Maroo’s Bazaar November 16th on all Platforms with a slew of Prime goods for you to obtain. You can either purchase Relics from her Wares with Aya (free path) or gain instant access to Prime items and bundles with Regal Aya (purchase path).

What are Aya and Regal Aya?

These are the currencies that are used to purchase items from Varzia!

Aya is an earned currency that is your free path to gaining Prime items through the in-game Relic system. It is a resource that is exchanged for Void Relics and other non-premium items available in Varzia’s wares. Aya is found in Missions (The Void or Bounties) or has a chance of appearing in Relic Packs available for purchase in the Market for Platinum or Syndicate Offerings for Standing.

Regal Aya is a premium currency (similar to Platinum, but not tradeable) that gives you instant access to Prime Warframes, Weapons, Accessories, and Bundles available in Varzia’s wares. It can be purchased in the Market or online storefronts.

We have an extremely thorough Dev Workshop / FAQ explaining how this Event came to be, including the introduction of Regal Aya. Simply put, The Prime Vault program has undergone many changes over the years, all driven by player feedback and requests.

The theme over these changes has been to offer more choice and quicker access to Vaulted Prime rotations. Which is where Prime Resurgence comes in. Please read our Dev Workshop for more information, otherwise enjoy the largest Prime Vault opening of all-time, with a significantly s

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CephalonAhmes
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2021
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Spi__
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fast_Echidna_8520
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2022
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I had a vasectomy because I didn’t want any kids.

When I got home, they were still there.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/demotrek
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2022
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It is really unfortunate that Islam, Christianity, and Judaism have been fighting each other for centuries.

Hindus, on the other hand, never had any beef.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Utkarsh_Anand2004
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2022
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I dislike karma whores who make posts that imply it's their cake day, simply for upvotes.

I won't be doing that today!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/djcarves
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2021
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Detailed comparison of Shadowflame vs Horizon

A few weeks ago I posted my Shadowflame vs Void Staff comparison to show the MR cutoff for which the latter overtakes Shadowflame for damage. Can be found here. A lot of comments wanted info on Horizon focus and other AP items. So here is my findings in hopefully a digestible manner in the TL;DR under this paragraph again. A lot of this is subjective and you can argue for one build over another there isn't quite a clear this is good this is bad answer here.

Feel free to follow or message me on twitter

TL;DR

At 2 items Shadowflame is almost always better than Horizon focus UNLESS you have ludens + sorcs and are targeting an enemy champ with 35MR or less (very rare). Shadowflame provides a great base for later in the game going into 3rd and 4th items where you can choose to go Dcap/Void/Horizon.

3 items void dcap almost always GOATED but void second is not as good as shadow. Scale or Sin you decide.

If you do not have ludens or sorcs or both, Horizon becomes more comparable vs reasonable targets 50MR-80MR.

NLR>Hextech as long as you can land 2.8AP worth of spells i.e 4 spells ish within the 40s window. Jewel is pretty even to NLR and likely performs great to sit on whilst finishing your 3rd item. (Will look into it)

EDIT2: As pointed out by u/could_eat shadowflame+void is not working as expected. However it doesn't work as he suggests where shadow pen is applied then magic% from void. I tested in practise but maybe practice is bugged. Will test in live later and see and then adjust if needed but basically shadowflame+Void builds are a little weaker than first suggested.

Intro

Let's start off by saying I will not show any derivation of my formulas I made last time as I simply just adjusted them for cutoffs for MR/AP/ratios, you can find them in the last post.

Shadowflame vs Horizon Focus comparison of stats:

Items Shadowflame Horizon Focus
AP 100 85
AH 0 15
HP 200 150
Passives 10-20 (Based on target's current health) 20 when target =1000hp* and 10 when target is 2500. 10% Bonus damage for 6s when CC'ing or dealing damage to a champion 700units or more away.
Cost 3000g 3000g

Some stat differences, 15 AP, 15 AH, 50 HP and shiny different passive between the two which do similar things. The passives is where people are having the biggest issue debunking as 10% bonus dmg soun

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LucidDreams27
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2021
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For Gotham
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FreeHugsXD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2022
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The Ancient Romans II
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mordrathe
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2021
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I did it, I finally did it. After 4 years and 92 days I went from being a father, to a dad.

This morning, my 4 year old daughter.

Daughter: I'm hungry

Me: nerves building, smile widening

Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.

She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.

Thank you all for listening.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sk2ec
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2022
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I'd like to dedicate this joke to my wisdom teeth.

[Removed]

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThoughtPumP
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2022
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Where do you find a cow with no legs?

Where ever you left it πŸ€·β€β™€οΈπŸ€­

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kitkatty0309
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16 2022
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It this sub dead?

There hasn't been a post all year!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheTreelo
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2022
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Naan-negotiable
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sjmaeff
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16 2022
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My husband said our infant son could microwave...

And then shook his arm really fast.

(True story, please groan with me.)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Raw0nion
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2022
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How do you stop Canadian bacon from curling in your frying pan?

You take away their little brooms

πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Majorpain2006
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2022
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School Was Clothed
πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kennydoe
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2022
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What did 0 say to 8 ?

What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/designjeevan
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2022
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