What do you call someone from Florida with lots of teeth who likes to spend money on the stock market?
All the hair dressers all closed due to covid, so I start looking to the black market for a haircut
But I heard they were under cutting everyone
I finally went to talk to the super cute girl who works in the Egyptian super market.
Her: What can I do for you?
Me: I'm looking for a date.
Her: Oh, what kind of dates?
Me: Uhmm, just dinner and a movie :)
People ask me why I keep bring my sled to places like yard sales and the flea market
I tell them the answer is simple...Toboggan!
My wife didn’t like my idea to market a line of belts with little clocks built into the buckle.
She said it was a waist of time.
Whats the worst crime to occur at a fish market?
A peasant's wife told him to go get milk for the baby. Dutifully, he went to the market with the baby and brought home a hefty jug of milk. "You've forgotten the baby!" she exclaimed.
"No I haven't... I got milk for the baby!"
Why does the Dalai Lama love to play the stock market?
We went to a new market today for the first time. Dad was very impressed.
He said, “You’re telling me a flea runs this market?!”
My wife and I went down to the seafood market, but I didn't trust the employees there.
They seemed a little fishy.
I heard Apple are trying to seize the market on immaterial groups of dolphins
I think they called them airpods
I’m ready to bring my injectable coronavirus cleansers and gamma-ray beds to market
This is going to make a killing
I just invested in a company that will pay me to keep t-bones and rib-eyes in my freezer to sell when the market improves...
My friend is trying to market his design for an invisible aeroplane.
I can’t see it taking off.
I just asked my dad to give me a crash course on the stock market
He said, “Well it’s crashing on course right now.”
What happened to the lions neck at the Chinese market?
Did you hear about Mcdonald's trying to get into the steakhouse market?
Two Irishmen rob a grocery store of a pallet of exotic macadamia nuts to sell on the black market. They begin to argue about where to take the pallet when the passenger says "You're driving me nuts!" The driver replies..
An aspiring beekeeper went to a farmer’s market to pick up a small hive. They placed an order for a dozen bees. When picking up the bees, the seller handed them a case of thirteen bees. Noticing the extra bee, the keeper pointed it out to the seller.
The seller said, “Oh, that last one is a freebee!”
The baby donkey market is not appealing to sellers
The baby donkey market is difficult to get into and takes a lot of work because it's a small-ass business.
Whenever I see the stock market about to crash
I yell out ENNNNRONIIIING!!!!
Glass urns coming to the market now. How well they will sell? Remains to be seen.
I hear that Audi is going to rename their pickups for the US market by calling it the Audi Pardner.
Why did the DJ go to the farmers' market?
I'm going to market a new organic fertilizer made from 100% male chicken manure. It will be sold as
What did the Spanish Lady say to her friend when she went to the market?
Aaa..me go Doubling down to the City.
Where does a dog go to buy black market goods?
Why did the fisherman go to the market
Why did the fisherman go to the market?
For the halibut.
Why did the buffalo go to the market?
I wonder if all those piggies were on their way to market?
My wife wanted me to attend a flea market this weekend that only deals with Middle Eastern items...
I thought hmmm.... that’s bazaar.
My wife said she wants to buy a fancy pillowcase at the flea market
I told her careful it might be a sham
I'm going to start a line of footwear to market to exotic dancers.
They're called Daddy Is-Shoes.
I'm designing a drug that invigorates you as it mellows you out. I plan to market it
Ostrich meat would be a market I could get into to make some good money...
but it probably wouldn't take off.
Wen't to the farmers market.
My wife bought some duck eggs at the farmers market the other day. I told make sure you don't drop them or they might quack open.
Went to dinner at Boston Market last night.
They had two types of corn bread and my mother and I were trying to figure out what the difference between them was.
I looked at her with a grin slowly spreading across my face and said "maybe one is cornier."
I had to go outside for a minute because I was laughing so hard at my own joke.
My shoe company has recently been able to successfully market the largest shoes in the world
I told my dad that I went to the farmers market today...
He asked me if my trip was fruitful.
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