What word in the English language is almost always spelled wrong?
The mortician put down the wrong headstone
What did Homer Simpson say when he shot the wrong deer?
A dad is driving the wrong way down a one way street. The son says “Dad! This is a one way street!”
Dad says “I am going one way!”
At first I was angry about them getting my order wrong at the Indian Restaurant, but honestly it’s not a big deal.
Why is the clock in the buffet always wrong?
it keeps going back 4 seconds.
My son said the neighborhood pumpkin display was really beautiful but I told him he was wrong.
There certainly are some challenges when helping out your elderly parents, lately my Dad has been consistently putting his shoes on the wrong feet…
Luckily the basement tenant doesn’t mind at all.
When my daughter was christened, the priest used the wrong font
Now her name is Times New Roman
I took my 8 year old girl to the office with me on "take your kid to work day". As we were walking around the office, she started crying and getting very cranky, so I ask her what was wrong.
As my co-workers gather round, she sobbed loudly "Daddy where are all the clowns you said you worked with?!"
I almost used the wrong herb in my food
I caught myself just in thyme
Did you hear about the musician fired from the orchestra for playing loudly at the wrong time?
Autocorrect seems to suggest the wrong words sometimes.
They should defiantly fix this.
I got fired from a local funeral home for digging plots in the wrong spots.
What do you get when you get the wrong colour of concrete?
I once debated a flat earther. He got so mad he stormed off saying he would walk to the edge of the earth to prove me wrong.
He’ll come around eventually.
What was wrong with the giant's glasses?
They needed to be Titan'ed
Family of my wife's side made horribly wrong decisions in the buisness
They are now truly in-laws.
What is the best whiskey to drink when things go wrong?
My wife looked at my son (7) yesterday and told him his shoes were on the wrong feet
Without missing a beat he said "They can't be, these are the only feet I have"
Proud dad moment!
What did everyone eat at the picnics where everything went wrong?
Me, thinking about the purpose of life. Wife stares at me like I said something wrong.
Met my barber on the wrong side of the road in a blind curve but he didn't hit me
I rubbed my chin and thought, "That was a close shave."
I lost my job at the cemetery because I buried someone in the wrong plot
I said "Something is wrong with these kids, we've got to get them to the hospital..."
"What is it?" said my wife.
"Well, it's a big building with a bunch of patients. But that's not important right now."
People say biker gangs, mafia groups, and billionaires run this country. Wrong. It's the head of the dairy lobby.
TIFU by posting in the wrong sub
As I walked into the house, I could tell something was wrong, but I couldn't put my finger on it.
Then, it hit me like a ton of bricks.
My dentist did a root canal on the wrong tooth...
Jimmy Johns got my order wrong, I showed them the sandwich they gave me
I'm dyslexic and I accidentally boarded the wrong method of public transportation.
I slept on the wrong side of the bed last night…
Still can’t figure out how I fit under it.
The Navy sent the wrong men to the bottom of the ocean.
What did one potato say to the other who wanted to prove everyone wrong?
“You sure have a chip on your shoulder”.
Did I walk into the wrong bar?
If a muffin goes wrong in the worst possible moment...
Dad: what do you do when you are in the wrong seat?
Wait, I think I got the whole dating thing wrong
A pirate walks into a bar and it was at that moment that he realized that his patch was on the wrong eye.
A flat earther was debating me and got so mad he said "I will walk off the edge of the earth to prove you wrong!!"
He'll come around eventually
I took my 8-year old girl to the office with me on, "Take Your Kid to Work Day." As we were walking around the office, she starting crying and getting very cranky, so I asked what was wrong with her.
As my coworkers gathered round, she sobbed loudly, "Daddy, where are all the clowns that you said that you worked with?!"
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