There was a civil war at the North Pole once, but the elves don't talk about it much...
It was a cold war. Also a short war, with little casualties.
It lasted six months. The truce came after the elves realized they'd wasted the whole day fighting.
What do you call a neon sheep in the Star Wars universe?
Chewbacca of Star Wars was once a great baseball player in The Major Leagues. . . . . .
Seriously, he won Wookie of the year.
Who stared as Han Solo in the Scandinavian remake of Star Wars?
Today marks the 77th anniversary that my grandfather was responsible for bringing down 4 German bombers in one day during the war
He was the worst mechanic the luftwaffe ever had
Did you hear about the team that lost in tug of war?
They couldn't pull it together.
If the Scottish and the Irish went to war, no matter the victor, both sides would have kilt it.
What is the name of the big hairy guy in a redneck Star Wars remake?
“So, the US is pulling out of the war right? Like, we don’t care about their fighting anymore?”
Norway just made the decision to put QR codes on the side of all its war ships.
Now they can Scandinavian!
After watching me read “War and Peace”, my son asked me, “Dad, why is the book so thick?”
Me: Well, it’s ......a long story.
The new Godzilla Vs. Kong trailer says that Kong and Godzilla are at war...
Does that mean Kong might use... guerrilla warfare?
What do you call a statue in the star wars shop?
Most people consider the Battle of Gettysburg the turning point of the American Civil War
For the Confederacy, it all went South from there
The bird war is over
They signed a peace tweety
A husband and wife were at a marriage counselor. The wife complained, "he only talks about Star Wars! I've had it. I'm leaving him!" The counselor turned to the husband: "well?"
The husband looked at his wife and said, "divorce is strong with this one."
Why do Swedish war ships have barcodes painted in the side?
So when they come in they can Scandinavian.
Mart Mc Fly traveling into the Star Wars universe be like,
What does Larry King call the War of 1812?
Why did Will have a bad time during the war?
Because they were firing at will
A German soldier during World War II was embellishing the number of troops he had with him
When the Allies thought it was just him, he claimed there were not 1 but 2. Then he changed his story to 3. Then he said 5, then 8, then 13, and finally 21. When the Allies made it to his position, they discovered that it actually was just him.
Turns out he was a fibber nazi.
Who were the most tired people in the Cold War?
Leia: “Years ago you served my father in the Clone Wars...”
Dad: “Was her father a turkey?”
TIL about the 1860's guano wars in South America.
They were bat shit crazy.
I told my kids I served in the Baby Wars.
My wife broke up with me at the star wars celebration. An anakin cosplayer came up to me, put his hand on my shoulder, and said...
What do you call the last chapter in a book about the Civil War?
Everyone keeps saying that after the election there's gonna be a civil war. I disagree.
There's gonna be a Trumper Tantrum
What will be played at remembrance of the Internet Wars?
After I joined the army, I served in a furious war of Iraq , when we came home, I was sent to jail, I don't understand why......
My lieutenant said , fire in the hole and I fired In his hole .
Helmet won by Sir Cumsize during war in the year 1215AD
Why can't Mike Tyson live in the Star Wars universe?
Because it's inhothpitable.
You know what they said about the war between America and Russia?
In a vote for my favourite film of the Star Wars franchise ...
... ‘Solo’ would win Hans down.
(I’m sure that’s been done before but it’s new to me. Sorry if that’s the case! Meanwhile I am trying to come up with a version about who shot first - Han or Greedo - but Solo had one Han up and the other under the table, so not both Hans and not really “down” either. Shucks)
Why did the Star Wars movies come out in 4, 5, 6, 1, 2, 3?
Yoda: In charge of scheduling, I was.
The next Star Wars movie will debut a new droid with a comically-short attention span.
The Star Wars series is coming out with a female villain
She'll be able to use the force to raise and lower things.
Her name will be Ella Vader
What vehicle did German soldiers use to drive around during the second world war?
Hens were often used in the Revolutionary War to identify colonists that were loyal to the Crown.
You never learned about chicken-catch-a-Tory?
What was the best weapon during the Cold war?
After watching Star Wars, my friend on tumblr told me he identifies as The Force
I guess that makes him a ForceKin
My wife said she'd leave me if I didn't stop the Star Wars puns.
Divorce is strong with this one.
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