A man is walking down the street when he looks into an alley and sees 2 sharks standing up.
One shark hands the other one a small packet full of some suspicious white powder.
"That's some fishy business" the man remarks.
I walked down this street where the houses were numbered, 64K, 128K, 256K, and 1MB
That was a trip down memory lane.
I found myself bereft at the chaos that run through the winding streets of China town. The horror
A magician was driving down the street
and then he turned into a driveway.
Be very careful out on the streets...
Because yesterday at around 7:30 pm a clown who was wearing a colourful sweatshirt, pulled out a pair of scissors and stared at me. Luckily I had enough agility and I pulled out a rock, because if I would have pulled out a paper, he would have won
Two butts are walking down the street and one farts
- "You took words right out of my mouth" says the other
Did you guys hear the one about the two peanuts walking down the street?
One of them was a salted.
There is a new drug on the streets called Jesus Christ...
Ya, most users are taking the Lord's name in vein.
I have been working on the most illogical street performance act...
I tried street tacos for the first time and man they were awful
They tasted like asphalt!
Why did the dish washer cross the street?
There was a fork in the road.
I just found out that Mercedes is donating state of the art street sweepers to some of the largest cities around the world to help fight littering.
They’re calling it Mercedes-clenz
As I was walking down the street, I noted a man with a large pole in his hand and stopped to ask, "Are you a pole-vaulter?"
His response was, "No, I'm German, but how did you know my name was Walter?"
I was walking down the street after leaving the pharmacy and noticed a casket was chasing me. Well all I had was a bottle off cough syrup so I threw it at the casket...
...and then the coffin stopped.
What do you call a random dog you see on the street?
Nothing, you make weird noises until it comes close enough for you to pet it
What State Has The Most Streets?
A dad meets his friend on the street. “Have you met my daughter Beth?” “No, what’s Beth short for?”
“I don’t know, most three year olds aren’t that tall.”
For a temp job I had to conduct surveys on the street and often times people would reluctantly comply disclaiming to "Keep it short please!"
So my question was: What do you know about dwarves?
i turned left on the wrong street while driving...
too late i found the error of my waze.
I was walking down the street and suddenly ran into the guy who once sold me an antique globe.
Two tomatoes crossed the street. One got squashed by a car, the other one passed it and said:
I passed a guy giving away watches on the street.
He must have a lot of free time on his hands.
My father always taught me to be prepared for any emergency. I was on the ball when the streets flooded...
I asked the driver if this ride would take me to 4th Street in St.Louis, Missouri.
Did you hear about the man who lost his home and had to live on the streets?
Two hot dogs are walking down the street
One suddenly turns to the other and says
"Mike! Your wiener is showing!"
What do you call it when there is a crack in the street?
Apparently there’s a group down the street that’s amazing at grabbing things, but they refuse to do it when I’m around.
They never seize to amaze me
Two psychics run into each other on the street.
One says to the other “you’re doing fine but how am I?”
Why couldn't picabo street work as a receptionist in the I.C.U.?
She would say "picabo I.C.U."
I saw a bear begging for food in the street.
I got stopped in the street by a lady conducting a survey.
"What do you know about dwarfs?" She asked.
"Very little." I replied.
I saw my dentist walking down the street the other day...
He was shaking his head and looking at his watch. He said I'm overdue for an appointment and that he has an opening today. I asked what time can I come in? He smugly replied "tooth hurty".
Holmes and Watson are creeping stealthy along the Street, searching for clues, when Holmes suddenly spots a Bakery shop window and scans it with his magnifying glass. Watson perplexed, says to Sherlock " What are you looking for exactly ? " ...Holmes replies...
" You know my method. It's founded upon the observation of Trifles. "
now i understand why i hate The Wolf of Wall Street movie
I was feeling a little depressed, and then I saw a clown doing sit-ups across the street.
Funny how things work out.
I found this Arhaus employee tag yesterday... In the middle of the street
imgur.com/DZvBeYe
Three tomatoes are walking down a street: papa tomato, mama tomato, and baby tomato. The baby tomato starts lagging behind and papa tomato gets really angry, goes back and squishes him. He says...
What did the man say to the rabid dog in the street?
A magician was driving down the street when BOOM!
He turned into a driveway.
Two peanuts were walking down the street
Which state has the most streets?
What happened to the magician who was driving down the street?
He turned into a driveway.
Which state has the most streets?
Two fortune tellers meet on the street.
One says to the other, “You’re fine, how am I?”
Two peanuts were walking down the street.
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