Scientists have developed a microscopic needle that is too small to be seen by the naked eye...
I just don't see the point.
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︎ Jan 12 2021
Scientists in Dublin are assisting in the research for a covid vaccine.
They are known as the Fighting Virish
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︎ Jan 26 2021
What did scientists call the shovel when it was first created?
A ground-breaking discovery
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︎ Nov 27 2020
The rocket scientists finally figured out what when wrong with their missile launch ...
Turns out it was a case of projectile dysfunction.
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︎ Nov 22 2020
Why did the bacterial scientist quit his job?
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︎ Dec 23 2020
Did you hear about the fashionable scientist who can design your baby to your specifications?
They are always bragging about their designer jeans
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︎ Dec 16 2020
Scientists developed a male birth control gel but it only targets the X/Y chromosome
Theyre calling it "Son-Block"
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︎ Dec 06 2020
Did you hear about the scientist who was lab partners with a pot of boiling water?
He had a very esteemed colleague.
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︎ Dec 01 2020
Scientists have recently recorded the sounds of two helium atoms laughing
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︎ Oct 21 2020
When the scientist wanted to clone a deer ...
he bought a doe it yourself kit.
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︎ Oct 30 2020
Scientists got bored after watching the Earth turn after 24 hours
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︎ Jul 19 2020
Scientists have discovered that bees are learning to conserve energy by gliding on the air...
They think they're evolving into frisbees.
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︎ Nov 28 2020
A scientist sits down with some colleagues at the lab cafeteria:
"Oh hi Bill! We were just discussing the promiscuous mating habits of blood-sucking arachnids." Bill abruptly grabs his tray and stands up to leave.
"Sorry guys. I don't discuss poly ticks at work."
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︎ Nov 21 2020
Archaeologists found traces of Trinitrotoluene in a T-Rex skeleton. Scientists have since determined that T-Rex's muscles used the compound to function.
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︎ Sep 14 2020
Scientists have discovered a new element in the periodic table.
The element will be represented by the letters AH. This is of course the element of surprise.
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︎ Oct 13 2020
Scientists recently performed an experiment to figure out the gender of an ant. They would place them in a tub of water.
If they sank, girl ant. If they floated, buoyant.
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︎ Sep 02 2020
It took scientists 15 tries to create the perfect sleep aid. Attempts A-N had no effect..
But they concluded a Pill-O helped everyone sleep better
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︎ Jul 20 2020
Early scientists would watch the world spin for 24 hours...
Then they got bored and called it a day.
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︎ Sep 03 2020
A scientist walks into a lab to pick up a dozen beakers for a new experiment heβs been working on, and the lab clerk hands him 13 upon his arrival. β13?β, the scientist asks, βI wanted a dozen!β
The lab clerk says βI thought you wanted a beakers dozen!β
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︎ Jun 25 2020
Scientists have discovered the trick STIs use to spread in Alabama
Mum-to-sis
If this isn't original then I seriously spent a whole 20 mins on nothing
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︎ Sep 04 2020
I boasted to my son, "Did you know scientists discovered that the brains of male parents irreversibly change after their first child was born?" He rolled his eyes and ignored me, but I carried on...
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︎ Aug 25 2020
Why do scientists chew gum all the time?
Because they like ex-spearmints.
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︎ Jul 18 2020
In a freak accident the laboratory sink came to life, made its way to the mad scientist's door and knocked.
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︎ Jun 30 2020
What did the optimistic scientist say when he woke up?
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︎ Aug 10 2020
What happened to the scientist when he broke the speed of light?
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︎ Jun 09 2020
Scientists have noticed that patients who have the cold feel better on Saturdays and Sundays.
Itβs the weekend immune system.
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︎ Jul 18 2020
Why did the scientist researching death and the afterlife kill himself?
He was dying to know what happens.
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︎ Jun 13 2020
Why did the scientist eat photons after lunch?
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︎ Apr 28 2020
Scientists are studying the effect of drugs on various seabirds.
They're leaving no tern unstoned.
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︎ Apr 22 2020
Scientists found that the nervous system doesn't actually exist.
It's just a lack of the confidence system.
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︎ Apr 12 2020
Did you hear about the scientists who discovered there are bank clerks on the moon?
They saw them through their teller-scopes.
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︎ Apr 30 2020
Breaking news: Scientists have discovered a new element that disappears and reappears at random times. They have called it the element of...
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︎ Oct 22 2019
What did the scientist say when he found two atoms of helium?
HeHe.
my biology teacher told this one in class today.
i was the only student that found it genuinely funny.
the class was silent, besides me. i was laughing. really hard.
:'(
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︎ Aug 27 2019
"He's the most foul mouthed person to ever live!" screamed the scientist who cloned himself and later tried to throw the clone off the roof.
He was arrested for attempting to make an obscene clone fall.
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︎ Apr 15 2020
What did the scientists say while freezing at absolute zero?
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︎ Aug 28 2019
Scientists have determined exactly what will spell the end of the world
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︎ Dec 26 2019
What did the scientist do when he was cold?
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︎ Feb 13 2020
Scientists and programmers have gotten together to write computer code that will not only warn of future global warming but also take credit for inventing the internet.
It's an new Al-Gore-rithm
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︎ Nov 23 2019
What did the scientist say when his fridge got down to -459 F?
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︎ Aug 22 2018
I made the mistake of drinking the liquid from a scientistβs test tube.
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︎ Jun 30 2019
The problem with atmospheric scientists
is that they always seem to have their head in the clouds.
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︎ Jan 06 2020
Scientists record the sound of two helium atoms laughing.
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︎ Oct 30 2019
When the scientist wanted to clone a deer ..
he bought a doe it yourself kit.
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︎ May 24 2020
It took scientists 15 tries to create the perfect sleep aid. Attempts A-N had no effect..
But a Pill-O helped everyone sleep better.
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︎ Jul 20 2020
Scientists got bored watching the earth turn, so after 24 hours
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︎ Dec 27 2018
Why did the scientist eat photons after lunch?
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︎ Apr 28 2020
Scientist studying the effect of cannabis on seabirds, have left no tern unstoned.
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︎ Aug 15 2018
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