Got the preemptive reversal from my own father this evening. Sign of a true master.

We were discussing an upcoming business trip I'm taking you next week, when he says:

"So what's taking you there, other then the plane?"

Smooth Dad, real smooth.....

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Spyrulfyre
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2019
🚨︎ report
As I put the car in reverse, I thought to myself....

This takes me back.

πŸ‘︎ 87
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2021
🚨︎ report
If anyone has a suggestion on how to reverse the spell that turned me into corn...

...I’m all ears.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cognimaniac
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2021
🚨︎ report
Dad puts the car in to reverse and thinks

I hope no-one is behind us

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DapperDavidYT
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2021
🚨︎ report
Some of my pun-tastic Halloween costumes throughout the years: Reverse Cowgirl, Edgar Allan Ho, and Freudian Slip.
πŸ‘︎ 60
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Whilst reversing the car into a parking spot, I leaned over to my wife and said...

β€œNow this takes me back”

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/fredwardofox
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2020
🚨︎ report
I just drove my new car out of the lot only to find the reverse gear broken.

There’s no going back now.

πŸ‘︎ 39
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2020
🚨︎ report
I said I love the Reverse Flash on Barry Allen's subreddit

I received the fastest ban alive.

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ebatm3
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2020
🚨︎ report
Choose any number between 2 and 8. Multiply by 4, and then add 3. Now reverse the digits and close your eyes.

Dark, wasn’t it?

πŸ‘︎ 34
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14 2020
🚨︎ report
So I keep asking people β€œWhat do you get when you reverse the word β€œon?””

Everyone keeps telling me no.

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jlionbad
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Number wars, a dad joke story.

6 couldn't believe it. 7 had finally gone off the deep end. 7 had long offended 6. A repeat 6 offender if you will. But this was unforgivable. 9 was his best friend. How could he do this to his best friend? How could it be that 7 ate 9?

6, filled with fury, called his friends 2 and 4. They would get even. 10 was the best friend of 7 you see. 2, 4 and 6 ate 10 to get even. They then began plotting further revenge, but 7 acted first. He gathered 1, 3 and 5 together to take down 6.

Realizing that the odds were against them, 2, 4 and 6 retreated. Their only option was to turn to 12 who had twice the resources 6 had. 7 couldn't follow.

12 quickly called 3 to find out what the root of 7's attack on 9. 3 wasn't sure. He had only supported 7 because of a long standing friendship. But 3 promised to get to the root cause.

Meanwhile, 7's scheming was not yet done. 12 was powerful, but there was one who could reverse his decision to harbor 6. If he could just convince 21, nicknamed blackjack, to reverse 12's decision, it would all be over.

Three times 7 went to 21's compound. On the third try he was able to get through. After explaining that 6 had masterminded the elimination of 10, a grand meeting of the numbers was called.

Both 6 and 7 argued over the whole thing. 13 had the unlucky task of adjudicating the meeting. Each time 13 made an argument, 6 and 7 would add to it by shouting over each other.

Finally, 21 had had enough. "7, why did you eat 9"

7 responded "I just wanted to get 3 square meals." 21 had 7 eliminated for initiating the battle and 6 jailed for masterminding 10's death. And the war was over.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Calthropstu
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2021
🚨︎ report
The word 'nothing' is a palindrome. 'Nothing' reversed is 'Gnihton'

which also means nothing.

πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sexxc
πŸ“…︎ Feb 09 2020
🚨︎ report
If anyone could just reverse the process of making wine, that would be grape.
πŸ‘︎ 768
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Maax42_
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2018
🚨︎ report
Why are the clocks which move in reverse not fans of smart clocks??

Because they are anti clock 'wise'

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thesilentcomic
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2019
🚨︎ report
We don’t do the reverse cowgirl around here.

That’s because we never turn our back on family.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/xXAnimeAngelXx
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2019
🚨︎ report
I was on the trail in Colorado or somewhere when I happened upon a dude that couldn't get his donkey in reverse.

A donkey-whisperer rapper-wanna-be, I was able to back that ass up, yo. Uh huh.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2019
🚨︎ report
We will never run out of puns now!

A giant list of puns

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.

What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.

What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.

Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.

Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention.

A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.

What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.

I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.

Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.

Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"

Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.

What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.

Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.

A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.

After the accident, the juggler didn’t have the balls to do it.

I used to be afraid of hu

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/communist_scumbag
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
🚨︎ report
Every time my dad reverses the car...

"Ahhh....this takes me back..."

Every. time.

πŸ‘︎ 324
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2016
🚨︎ report
I always enjoy putting the car in reverse...

It takes me back.

πŸ‘︎ 61
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Moggy1982
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2017
🚨︎ report
What happens when you call 119 instead of 911?

The cop car comes in reverse

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VoKai
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2020
🚨︎ report
I guess there have been safety concerns regarding NASCAR's track designs; specifically with the turns. In an attempt to address them, the courses were reversed.

They're all right now.

πŸ‘︎ 22
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Thewilltosucceed
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2017
🚨︎ report
President trump wants to abolish and reverse all the pro choice movements that have been made...

And there's no plan b.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Kopextacy
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2017
🚨︎ report
Herbal essentials

Noted researcher Rosemary Fuller was involved in a lab accident today. She's working on the theory that herb-based formulas can actually reverse or accelerate the aging process. Parsley, for example, has been shown to cause rapid aging, and recent efforts have shown good results with oregano-based anti-aging serums. Ms Fuller was, unfortunately, standing near a vat of simmering oregano serum when a nearby researcher nudged her and she fell in! It appeared at first that the anti-aging serum would cause her to de-age down to nothing. Now, though, it looks like she'll be all right. The Parsley's aged Rosemary in time.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/berenaltorin
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2020
🚨︎ report
A lot of people over at /r/funny think they know the best reversed GIF, but we know that *this* is truly the best reversed GIF

http://i.imgur.com/W0ZYeB6.jpg

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KhabaLox
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2014
🚨︎ report
My car's transmission is shot. The reverse doesn't work.

Dad: I guess there's no going back then

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/micketic
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2016
🚨︎ report
At Thanksgiving dinner with 8 kids under the age of 7, I made a joke about inventing a reverse hearing aid that tunes out children decibels.

It fell on deaf ears

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/borntobemild-
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2016
🚨︎ report
What's the reverse of withdrawing money from your account?

Deopposite

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2014
🚨︎ report
The best way to get dad joked:

I know it's been done before, and many a dad before me and many a dad after me will get to experience this, but in these dark times this was a ray of light that pierced me right to the core with joy.

I came home, and my bright and bubbly ballerina 6 year old runs up and says can I have a hug!?

She asks very tentatively because she knows I have been out all day and the routine is for me to grab a shower (COVID) before I let them get all over me.

So I say, not yet I'm dirty.

She says awww... then she turns to walk away, but then spins back around and looks at me dead in the eye and says:

Hi! um...

wait a sec,

um, I know um,

um, wait.... dir...

[Face beams the biggest smile of accomplishment]

Hi Dirty! I'm [daughter]!

I know we have those proud moments when they turn, but man her delivery, the awkwardness, and the sheer pride she beamed out when she realized she just pulled the reverse dad joke on me...

It's not the getting reverse dad'd, it's the joy and pride she had... she could have just graduated college, and that's how big her beaming smile was right then...

It's a memory I am going to keep and it really lit up this dark time.

πŸ‘︎ 52
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/leyline
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2020
🚨︎ report
Some unexpected consequences of coronavirus..

So it's been almost 3 weeks since a lockdown was triggered in the UK and there have been quite a few knock on effects.. Some good and some bad which I want to share in this post.

Firstly one of my friends lost his job. He worked as a psychic.. Never saw it coming. Its been a difficult couple of weeks and he is now considering a complete career change...considering becoming a baker of all things.. But I suppose he really kneads the dough. I suggested he focus on photography, but nothing ever developed.

Another of my friends was also made redundant. He managed to get a Skype interview for a position in Tescos within a few days. The interviewer asked him: "what is your biggest weakness?", he replied "I don't know when to quit". The interviewer said "OK, your hired". He said "I quit".

Work has been busy for me but since I can't enjoy the things I usually do I have been looking for some new things to do around the house. It's been nice have the thyme to do more cooking. I randomly started a boat building business in my garage.. Sails have gone through the roof.

In an unsettling reversal of my teenage years I am now shouting at my parents for leaving the house. I suggested they take up scrabble to keep them occupied.. Turned out to be a bad idea from the word go.

It's been great hearing about how world pollution levels have been failling. I read the story about fish now being visible in the canals in Venice.. I hope that story isnt a load of pollocks! Cod, these were eely bad. Will stop carping on now!

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Apr 10 2020
🚨︎ report
If he's the only thing that can reverse the effects of climate change, why won't he step up and get involved?

Hugh Jefferts has a lot to answer for.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2016
🚨︎ report
I reverse-dad-joked the husband

We were driving up to Austin to see a show sans kid for the evening, and stopped by a Culver's to get some delicious snacks for the road.

He got this mint chocolate chip shake thing and worked on it for the better part of 30 minutes before he sighed and put the cup down. He said, "This is too much. I just can't handle anymore."

I asked if he meant he was too full. "No, not physically," he said. "It's too strong in flavor. I can't take anymore, mentally."

I nodded, and after a second, said, "You can't take anymore, MINTally."

He facepalmed.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kmparker
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06 2014
🚨︎ report
The roles were reversed this time...

My dad has been growing a moustache for Movember, and I commented on it.

Me: You know, you should grow a Lenin beard; it'd suit you.

Him: Really?

Me: Yeah, you could cosplay as Lenin and go to conventions! Hey, you could go to CommieCon! [satisfied grin]

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jec178
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2013
🚨︎ report
How do you make a bus work under water?

Reverse the letters

πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/GabeRothel
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2020
🚨︎ report
If anyone has a suggestion on how to reverse the spell that turned me into corn...

...I’m all ears.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cognimaniac
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2021
🚨︎ report
I drove my new car out of the lot only to find that the reverse gear is broken.

There’s no turning back now.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2020
🚨︎ report
I drove my new car out of the lot, only to find the reverse gear broken.

There’s no going back now.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Choose any number between 2 and 7. Multiply by 4 and add 3. Now reverse the digits and close your eyes.

Dark, wasn’t it?

πŸ‘︎ 56
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2019
🚨︎ report
I drove my new car out of the lot only to find the reverse gear broken.

There’s no going back now.

πŸ‘︎ 43
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2019
🚨︎ report
As I turned on the car and put it in reverse, I thought to myself, man....

....this takes me back.

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Bro_Cha_ChoIF
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2020
🚨︎ report
And as I put the car in reverse I said

Man this takes me back

πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/GreenSpartan45
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2019
🚨︎ report
If someone could just reverse the process of making wine...

That would be grape.

πŸ‘︎ 159
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2018
🚨︎ report
I just drove my new car out of the lot, only to find the reverse gear broken.

There’s no going back now.

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2019
🚨︎ report
If anyone could reverse the process of making wine, that would be grape.
πŸ‘︎ 27
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lafleur2017
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2018
🚨︎ report
A giant list of puns from r/copypasta

A giant list of puns

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.

What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.

What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.

Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.

Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention.

A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.

What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.

I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.

Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.

Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"

Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.

What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.

Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.

A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.

After the accident, the juggler didn’t have the balls to do it.

I used to be afraid of hu

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the dad say when reversing his car?

"Ahh, this takes me back!"

πŸ‘︎ 28
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/FishcakeWoodSpy
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2017
🚨︎ report
514 Dad Jokes

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.

What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.

What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.

Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.

Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention.

A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.

What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.

I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.

Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.

Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"

Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.

What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.

Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.

A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.

After the accident, the juggler didn

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 81
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Josvys
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2019
🚨︎ report

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