The wife and I were at the marriage counselor. "Your wife says you never buy her flowers. Is that true?" The marriage counselor asked glaring at me.

I look at my wife frustratingly and shout "You never even told me you sold flowers!?"

👍︎ 1k
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📅︎ Feb 09 2021
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A husband and wife were at a marriage counselor. The wife complained, "he only talks about Star Wars! I've had it. I'm leaving him!" The counselor turned to the husband: "well?"

The husband looked at his wife and said, "divorce is strong with this one."

👍︎ 19
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👤︎ u/jfshay
📅︎ Nov 20 2020
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They needn't have worried about talking to the marriage counselor about their intimacy issues

He was a consummate professional

👍︎ 8
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👤︎ u/The_Possum
📅︎ Aug 18 2017
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I went over to my friend Micks house

I knocked on the door and his wife answered. She told me that Mick was in the barn so I went around back to find him.

I opened the door to the barn and to my complete horror, Mick was pole dancing in a leotard on a combine harvestor

Me: What the hell are you doing??

Mick: Well, you know how my wife and I have been having marriage problems. We went to go see a counselor and he said to put some spice back in the relationship i had to do something sexy to a tractor.

👍︎ 119
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📅︎ Jul 23 2019
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When I went into the barn I saw my father doing a strip tease act in front of our tractor

He explained that he went to a marriage counselor because mom didn't want to be intimate anymore. The counselor told him he should do something sexy to attract her.

👍︎ 13
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📅︎ Sep 24 2019
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