If Queen Elizabeth farts during dinner, all the other guests are supposed to pretend as if nothing happened.
Noble gases have no reaction.
π︎ 655
π
︎ Jan 10 2021
I just had a new wash basin delivered to our house for our guest bathroom, but my wife decided that she hates the design so much she won't even let me bring it in off the porch. It has been sitting by our front door for a week, A ENTIRE WEEK.
π︎ 45
π
︎ Dec 03 2020
Why were the guest performers arrested after the concert?
Because they stole the show.
π︎ 7
π
︎ Dec 27 2020
When I worked at the Haunted Mansion, a guest once asked me if we had any beer available.
I said, "No. We only have spirits here."
π︎ 11
π
︎ Aug 28 2020
π︎ 13
π
︎ Jan 31 2020
I guess the food is more fluid with the guests
π︎ 39
π
︎ Mar 27 2019
βͺI mashed a few mangoes, pineapples, melons, strawberries, and grapes into a π². Served the mash to guests visiting my place.
Called the dish, Mea Pulpa. β¬
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jun 30 2019
Did you know Def Leppard's drummer makes the best Thanksgiving guest?
He only ever needs one drumstick.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Nov 23 2019
How does the houseboat owner greet his guests?
βWelcome to my humble a-boat.β
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jul 30 2019
A drunk guest returns to his hotel and says to the clerk "Hi. I've forgotten what room I'm in."
Clerk responds, "No problem, sir. This room is called 'The Lobby'"
π︎ 83
π
︎ Nov 06 2018
The guests in this hotel are always stealing all the soaps, shower gels and shampoos from their rooms...
π︎ 4
π
︎ Apr 27 2019
[totally true story just happened to me:] *the setup* staying in an airbnb... another guest arrives, he is a neuro-surgeon from south korea... interviewing at UCSF - I built that hosptial, so said to him
Wow, neuro-surgeon huh... I'd like to pick your brain....
He did not get it...
(those type of pun opportunities dont come to mind that often...) ((another one bitches))
π︎ 11
π
︎ Apr 27 2017
π︎ 5
π
︎ Jun 25 2018
A house guest comments on the number of umbrellas we have at home...
"We're saving them for a rainy day."
π︎ 2
π
︎ Apr 22 2018
It was my father's funeral today and my brother has been going round all the guests trying to tell them about his new fish and herbs recipe...
I eventually pulled him over and said "c'mon dude, there's a thyme and a plaice" but this is not it!
π︎ 6
π
︎ Jun 19 2017
I finished mowing the lawn just before the first guests arrived for our party.
I didn't realize I was cutting it close.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Sep 07 2017
A guest at the restaurant I work at told me the daddest joke I've ever heard
I was walking by with a jar of olives when he told me:
"You know that was Santa's eighth reindeer, right?"
Me:"Umm, Olive?"
Him:"Yeah, you know the song! ..and olive the other reindeer laughed and called Rudolph names!"
π︎ 12
π
︎ May 30 2017
What did the waiter at the Japanese restaurant say to the guest when he accidentally served the wrong soup?
π︎ 4
π
︎ Aug 19 2017
The Prime Minister of Japan is meeting with the US President today and Trump told him that if he would spend the night, he'd rename the guest room after him.
The Shinzo Abe Lincoln Bedroom.
π︎ 8
π
︎ Feb 10 2017
If Queen Elizabeth farts during dinner, the other guests are expected to pretend as if nothing happened.
Noble gases have no reaction.
π︎ 11
π
︎ Oct 13 2020
If Queen Elizabeth accidentally farts during dinner, the other guests are supposed to pretend like nothing happened.
Noble gases should have no reaction
π︎ 571
π
︎ Nov 17 2019
If the Queen of England farts during dinner, the rest of the guests must pretend like nothing happened.
Noble gases should have no reaction.
π︎ 113
π
︎ Jun 12 2019
Royal etiquette: If Queen Elizabeth accidentally burps during dinner, the other guests must pretend that nothing happened.
Because Noble Gases shouldnβt have any reaction.
π︎ 110
π
︎ May 12 2018
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