If Queen Elizabeth farts during dinner, all the other guests are supposed to pretend as if nothing happened.

Noble gases have no reaction.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2021
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I just had a new wash basin delivered to our house for our guest bathroom, but my wife decided that she hates the design so much she won't even let me bring it in off the porch. It has been sitting by our front door for a week, A ENTIRE WEEK.

Let that sink in.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RobotPreacher
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2020
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Why were the guest performers arrested after the concert?

Because they stole the show.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheDreadist
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2020
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When I worked at the Haunted Mansion, a guest once asked me if we had any beer available.

I said, "No. We only have spirits here."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KCPStudios
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2020
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Guest to the waiter: β€œCan you bring me what the lady at the next table is having?” /r/Jokes/comments/ewmnrv/…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BenderDeLorean
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2020
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I guess the food is more fluid with the guests
πŸ‘︎ 39
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mehaxe
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2019
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β€ͺI mashed a few mangoes, pineapples, melons, strawberries, and grapes into a 🍲. Served the mash to guests visiting my place.

Called the dish, Mea Pulpa. ‬

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πŸ‘€︎ u/golubeerji
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2019
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Did you know Def Leppard's drummer makes the best Thanksgiving guest?

He only ever needs one drumstick.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kbdekker
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2019
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How does the houseboat owner greet his guests?

β€œWelcome to my humble a-boat.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Yaquinaking
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2019
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A drunk guest returns to his hotel and says to the clerk "Hi. I've forgotten what room I'm in."

Clerk responds, "No problem, sir. This room is called 'The Lobby'"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Eccohawk
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2018
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The guests in this hotel are always stealing all the soaps, shower gels and shampoos from their rooms...

Dirty bastards!

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LoliH-Entai
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2019
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[totally true story just happened to me:] *the setup* staying in an airbnb... another guest arrives, he is a neuro-surgeon from south korea... interviewing at UCSF - I built that hosptial, so said to him

Wow, neuro-surgeon huh... I'd like to pick your brain....

He did not get it...

(those type of pun opportunities dont come to mind that often...) ((another one bitches))

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sarah_Connor
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2017
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A shy priest greets the wedding guests to the Chapel. He's very nervous and doesn't say much. reddit.com/r/Jokes/commen…
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThiccGoose
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2018
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A house guest comments on the number of umbrellas we have at home...

"We're saving them for a rainy day."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sev-Enn
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2018
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It was my father's funeral today and my brother has been going round all the guests trying to tell them about his new fish and herbs recipe...

I eventually pulled him over and said "c'mon dude, there's a thyme and a plaice" but this is not it!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rossage99
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2017
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I finished mowing the lawn just before the first guests arrived for our party.

I didn't realize I was cutting it close.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/daytonatrbo
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2017
🚨︎ report
A guest at the restaurant I work at told me the daddest joke I've ever heard

I was walking by with a jar of olives when he told me: "You know that was Santa's eighth reindeer, right?" Me:"Umm, Olive?" Him:"Yeah, you know the song! ..and olive the other reindeer laughed and called Rudolph names!"

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πŸ“…︎ May 30 2017
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What did the waiter at the Japanese restaurant say to the guest when he accidentally served the wrong soup?

Miso sorry.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/eldowns
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2017
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The Prime Minister of Japan is meeting with the US President today and Trump told him that if he would spend the night, he'd rename the guest room after him.

The Shinzo Abe Lincoln Bedroom.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hew3
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2017
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If Queen Elizabeth farts during dinner, the other guests are expected to pretend as if nothing happened.

Noble gases have no reaction.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2020
🚨︎ report
If Queen Elizabeth accidentally farts during dinner, the other guests are supposed to pretend like nothing happened.

Noble gases should have no reaction

πŸ‘︎ 571
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bot_10
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2019
🚨︎ report
If the Queen of England farts during dinner, the rest of the guests must pretend like nothing happened.

Noble gases should have no reaction.

πŸ‘︎ 113
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Royal etiquette: If Queen Elizabeth accidentally burps during dinner, the other guests must pretend that nothing happened.

Because Noble Gases shouldn’t have any reaction.

πŸ‘︎ 110
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2018
🚨︎ report

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