Being an exorcist is a great job.

If the customers don't pay their bill, you can go back and repossess their house.

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📅︎ Apr 23 2020
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The Cheating Painter

A man was a painter, he sold paint and also painted houses for people. However, he liked to water down the paint and thin it. He would cheat his customers by forcing them to buy more paint than they needed due to the low quality.

One day, while up on a ladder painting a house with his thinned paint a bolt of lightning struck at him and he fell to the ground.

He heard a deep booming voice from heaven yell "repaint and thin no more!"

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📅︎ Jan 18 2015
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Heard this one while waiting at the DMV...

Customer: "Hey I have to pay my property taxes, but I heard they were on the house"

The lady at the window didn't get it but I let out a hearty chuckle for the dad paying.

👍︎ 41
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📅︎ Jul 21 2015
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Pulled a good one at the clothing store I work

Me: "Are you looking for something special today?"

Customer: "Not really, we're about to change all the windows in our house so I can't really afford anything right now."

Me: "Oh, so you're just window shopping, then."

Got a confused "eheh, yeaa" and a weird look but it was worth it.

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👤︎ u/Sk1llbug
📅︎ Nov 05 2015
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