I (34M) come from a relatively small traditional, Hispanic family. I have two older siblings, my dad died when I was a teenager and my mom is elderly and sick. My oldest brother (51) has a mental disorder. He can can eat and care for himself physically but cannot work or refuses to, and cannot be left unsupervised. He was not born this way, but rather developed it in his early 20s.
I was never close to him growing up. I felt he used his condition to his advantage and to gain sympathy from everyone. I had a feeling my dad felt the same way. They used to fight a lot about my brother being lazy and not pulling his fair share even before he developed the condition. I have always blamed my brother for causing unnecessary stress to my dad while he was battling cancer up to his eventual death. After he died, I got a part time job to help the family, while going to high school. Meanwhile, my brother has never held a job in his life.
I have made it clear to both my mother and sister that I refuse to be his caretaker when my mom passes. I have offered to provide some help financially, but I do not want him in my house for the rest of his life, or mine. I feel no emotional attachment to him. In fact, dare I say, he feels like a stranger to me.
My mom almost died last year and spent several months in a rehab facility. During this time, since I was working remote due to COVID, he came to stay with me. My sister rarely helped with him. Even when I had to have surgery, she only took him for one weekend and brought him back. She thinks that because I’m the man and my wife and I have no children, I must assume that responsibility. Anytime I bring it up she says as part of this family, I cannot just walk away from the responsibility as “despite everything, he is our brother”. My wife was happy to help last year, but did state she would not be ok with this being a permanent arrangement. Frankly, I can’t say I blame her for that.
Ultimately, I feel it is my mother’s responsibility to make future arrangements for her son’s well being and not just assume we will handle it. I have sat down with her and offered to pay for legal fees or whatever is needed, as long as she makes the arrangements. Months have gone by, and she just sweeps the topic under the rug. Even if my sister offered to split the caretaking duties and time, I just don’t want any part of it at all. They both think with time I will come around, but I am not.
EDIT: for many asking, he does have a diagnosis
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I notice that this is one of the more hated episodes of Capaldi's run but I cannot understand why. To me it just feels like a great example of the Twelfth Doctor being more dry and exhibiting his new persona a bit more. The sci-fi premise was perfectly serviceable but it took a backseat to the character development, especially between the Doctor and Clara, especially in the face of Danny Pink.
Not saying anyone's crticisms are invalid or anything, I am just curious because it is often associated with duds like Fear Her and Love and Monsters from my experience.
Does it have to do with being a Golden Child? Or they couldn't find somebody to marry her off to?
It’s been well over a year since I last posted this one.
The original was one of my favorite prompts of all time.
I hope we get some more excellent stories THIS year.
Was leyland kirby actually inspired by the film 'The Shining'?
There are so many posts (on for example r/mademesmile) of autistic non-verbal people (or otherwise disabled people) stimming or minding their own business while being filmed by their parents/caretakers and it just annoys me at no end. Especially the captions and comments!
I just saw another post of someone sharing a video of their non-verbal son being on holiday with them. The title was pointing out his disabilities and said something around the line of 'He reminds us to be happy even though he can't speak' and I found it awful. To me it was as if the parents were patting themselves on the back a la: 'Oh look we are such great people for raising our disabled son now give us upvotes'.
And it made me wonder if he even consented to being filmed and have his video shared to hundreds of thousands strangers on the internet. It did not appear as if they ask him beforehand.
The comments were also pretty bad. To cut them some slack though, I'm sure they were well-intended. But reading stuff about 'How inspirational' this is (Even though it was literally just a family on holiday? Not sure how this can be inspirational...) was just so bad. Or other stuff like 'Being with disabled people makes me enjoy life so much. Just seeing how happy they are.' The comment is clearly not mean, but it just rubs me the wrong way.
How is it so hard for non-disabled/neurotypical people to think of us as normal people and not some sort of inspirational p#rn to make themselves feel better?
Sorry, I needed to vent!
Title prettt much. We are in our late 20s, engaged, I have frequent focal seizures that lead to psychotic and micropsychotic episodes that make me a huge danger to myself. Now I have to take care of my fiancé who has recently had psychosis and is NOT recovering well at all. He can’t shower, get dressed, eat without me helping him
He was supposed to be my support and I don’t think I can do the same for him.
We can’t figure out the system. I’m nearly psychotic all the time. He’s always staring at the wall moaning.
Who in this fucking world can help me?!
Passaic county NJ
Oh and we need to get into another living situation stat. Fuck. I’m crying this is all too stressful I don’t know what’s going on none of us know what’s going on.
I saw this movie in ~2013-2016 on Netflix. One of the weirdest movies I've ever seen and I haven't been able to find it since.
The movie starts off with two American GI's driving through a snowy forest in a jeep. One is a big oaf type and the other is a squirly little Italian guy. I think the big guy tried deserting or was injured and the Italian guy was an MP. So their Jeep hits a mine or gets hit with an artillery round. It flips over, and they take off walking/running. One may have said "this is our chance to get out of this hellhole". So they walk through a forest, and come upon a bombed out church. They make camp, but see a light coming from the still-standing steeple. They investigate and there's a priest living there. But there's human bones, meat, and gore all over the inside of the room, possibly with bible verses or runes marked on the wall. So they tell him to stay away and they walk back into the woods. After a while they realize he's following them but he's skinny and old and nonthreatening so they let him if he keeps his distance. After a while they find a bunch of bodies who are hung from the trees. The priest explains the Germans came and hung the village. At one point they come across a bride and groom in their wedding attire hanging next to eachother. Eventually they stumble upon a sawmill (or maybe windmill? I'm pretty sure it was a sawmill) and so they break in and scavenge for food and supplies. An old woman comes out and one or both of the GI's try to rape her, but they get beaten by an old man with a gun. They wake up tied to chairs and they all talk. It turns out the old couple cares for disabled kids. Now, for some reason, a bunch of German tanks and infantry start to attack the mill so they make a truce and begin fighting alongside each other. At one point a little kid without legs rolls himself outside on a makeshift skateboard and goes under a tank, which blows up with the explosives he was holding. I think the old couple and the big oaf guy get shot and die, and the survivors run off into the woods. The movie ends with the GI and some disabled kids sitting around a fire, and the GI is sitting next to a mute girl who wears a mask (she appeared a few times earlier in the film). He lifts her mask off, they kiss, and the movie ends.
It's the weirdest damn thing and I've never been able to find anything evidence of it existing. Please help!
I honestly don't understand this whole "vacation" spiel from Kody. Going to another state got your daughter's surgery is in no way shape or form a vacation.
Were You the Hero, Caretaker, Mascot or Mastermind of Your Narcissistic Family?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YchV18fzi2w
How can get out of the "Caretaker" role?
- Roles assigned by the Narcissistic Parent for self-serving needs: Golden Child, Scapegoat, and Invisible Child.
- Hero, Caretaker, Mascot and Mastermind are roles children take on themselves that help them endure the suffering.
Waking up to this reality makes me sad. Especially since I was conditioned by my narcissistic parent early in my childhood
Hi. There ain't much lore I've managed to dig up on this subject. Most of it actually comes from the book "Amongst the Draugrs" which you fin in skyrim.
I just wonder if anyone have additional facts about what are draugrs exactly doing in the tombs.
Anything is useful for me on this subject, so please share if you have something
EDIT 08.12.2021:
I did not expect this massive amount of feedback. Many thanks to all of you for giving input. The reason I actually post here is because I'm working on a mod that is going to give the draugrs more tasks to do and it is much more inspiring for me to know why I do it and that I'm as lorefriendly as I can be on this matter.
This is info I picked from all answers in the thread:
- they are sleeping in shifts and each shift is responsible for maintenance of the tomb where the at least the following tasks are included (this also means you can really never clear out a tomb because most draugrs will actually be sleeping, and to you, look like they're truly dead):
Interior tasks:
- Lit and refill candles, fires and torches, urns, food, potions etc
- Cleaning and repairing the tomb (I'm thinking this includes the major cleaning/repair parts such as keeping the hallways intact and free of obstacles and not general household level.
- Guarding doors such as those sliding ones that only opens with dragonclaws
- Guarding the ruins in general against bandits and adventurers that might venture in.
- Worshipping at the dragon priest coffins to exchange their lifeforce back to their dragon priest. then go to their sleeping places to retain their lifeforce
Exterior tasks:
- Resource patrols to gain lumbers, pelts, meat/fats and oils from animals for candle materials,
- Controversial: Draugrs are able to launch attacks against outside enemies that are threatening their way of life. Such as bandits occupying ruins: Example: Volskygge in Skyrim. As a sidenote, I think I read somewhere that bandits in these places was leaving offerings for the draugs to avoid getting attacked by them, but I can't seem to find any reference on this.
- Guard patrol in places where this seems like strategic good idea, example Labyrinthian in Skyrim. This already exist in the vanilla game in some places.
- Worshipping trips: A trip to dragon lairs to pay respect or offerings to their true masters of their cult (dragon priests where only dedicated by the dragons themselves to lead the men)
These tasks helps define new rol
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