Did you hear about the cannibal who threw a pile of funny bones into a boiling cauldron?
He made himself a laughing stock
How do you think they measure the weight of bones?
They probably Skel-a-Ton at a time!
I was making chicken broth, but I used the chicken’s funny bone
You could say I made a laughing stock
Can you name all the bones in the body?
I swear I ordered the sirloin, yet they brought me a t- bone
Apparently I have been mistaken.
What did Bones say to Captain Kirk at the river crossing?
Dam it, Jim
(Be gentle it’s my cake day)
How many bones are in the human hand?
I know an archaeologist who found a human leg bone during an excavation. The other archaeologists got excited and went over to help him.
Turned out to be quite the shin dig.
I asked the guy at the meat counter for a couple of t-bones, but he gave me some sirloins instead.
He later apologized for his mis-steak.
My archeologist buddy invited me to a party. Apparently the entertainment was looking for leg bones in his backyard.
We found a dolphin skeleton on the beach, so we ground the bones to make some bread...
It was all-porpoise flour.
why couldn’t the vampire choose between ribeye, sirloin or T bone?
Because he was scared of stakes
I got a car in the shape of a bone
I just invested in a company that will pay me to keep t-bones and rib-eyes in my freezer to sell when the market improves...
My wife decided to put a bunch of leftover chicken bones in the crockpot so we can make a lot of soup at home as this thing drags on
When it was done she said "we're all stocked up!"
It’s the end of work on Friday, it’s been a long week, and all my bones are just like the capital city of the Holy Roman Empire.
What did the high archaeologist say to his colleagues upon discovering a trove of dinosaur bones?
Recently scientist found out the funny bone is not
Did you know that NASA found bones of an unidentified life form on the moon?
Update: bones have been identified, turns out the cow didn't make it all the way!
My son gets really excited when we go to the natural history museum. When he gets near the prehistoric bones, he just explodes with excitement and I can't deal with is new strength.
I'm just not qualified to handle his dino-might.
What did the skeleton say to the French soldier? Bone Jaw
What’s the least honest bone in the body?
Definately not the bones.
When the old man gives a dog a bone...
Did you know that a piranha can eat a kid down to the bone in 8 seconds...
anyways I lost my job at the aquarium today
And if that doesn’t work, try the funny bone!
At my job as a paleontologist, I was searching for the thigh bone of a Neanderthal.
I thought I had found it, but it was a fossil arm. Then upon searching the site further, I found a petrified sausage. It was the missing link.
What are the two most profane bones in the human body?
My wife is weeks pregnant. Lately the position of the baby has been hurting her tail bone. I had my face down by the belly, and my wife told me to talk to it. “Quit hurting your mother.” I said “ You’re grounded!”
I was going to buy some t-bones that were really expensive but I went with the safe choice.
When I was little, we went to an outdoor lecture featuring the original cast of Star Trek. I was especially excited to see Bones. Unfortunately, we were seated toward the side of the amphitheater, where huge oaks had been planted to frame the stage.
As a result, I couldn't see DeForest through the trees
Why does Satan not eat the Pizza bone?
Because he's the Anti-Crust!
How many bones are there in the human foot?
Slightly less than a handful.
I know a joke about the bone in the upper arm
Lady at the store told me her cat has very brittle bones.
I asked "Is that called osteo-purr-osis?"
My dad told me a joke about the bone in my arm..
What did the scientist dog do with his bones?
Did you guys hear about the coolest bone of the 1940s?
What's the funniest bone in your body?
Did you hear the one about the crossbow made out of rabbit bones?
They say it had a hare trigger!
How many bones are in the human hand?
How many bones are in the human hand?
How many bones are in the human hand?
How many bones are in the human hand?
Why were there bones on the moon?
Because the cow didn't make it.
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