A list of puns related to "Suspect X"
Officers have been working tirelessly to find the suspects.
They suspect fowl play.
They suspect the hijackers are a gang of hardened criminals.
But I suspect it's the ladder.
Press Release:
Animal conservatory staff gave police descriptions of the suspect who flung feces from the marsupial and antelope enclosures at a visiting Yogi.
"Do the letters TG mean anything to you?" He asked.
"No"
"What about RP?"
"No they mean nothing to me, " I replied.
"What about AH?" He asked.
"Look," I said, "am I suspected of something?
"No sir," he replied. "These are just initial inquiries."
The police suspected fowl play
I suspect fowl play.
The first guy answers, "That's easy, we'll catch him fast because he only has one eye!"
The policeman says, "Well...uh...that's because the picture I showed is his side profile."
Slightly flustered by this ridiculous response, he flashes the picture for 5 seconds at the second guy and asks him, "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?"
The second guy smiles, flips his hair and says, "Ha! He'd be too easy to catch because he only has one ear!"
The policeman angrily responds, "What's the matter with you two?!!? Of course only one eye and one ear are showing because it's a picture of his side profile! Is that the best answer you can come up with?"
Extremely frustrated at this point, he shows the picture to the third guy and in a very testy voice asks, "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?
He quickly adds, "Think hard before giving me a stupid answer."
The third guy looks at the picture intently for a moment and says, "The suspect wears contact lenses."
The policeman is surprised and speechless because he really doesn't know himself if the suspect wears contacts or not.
"Well, that's an interesting answer. Wait here for a few minutes while I check his file and I'll get back to you on that."
He leaves the room and goes to his office, checks the suspect's file on his computer and comes back with a beaming smile on his face.
"Wow! I can't believe it. It's TRUE! The suspect does, in fact, wear contact lenses. Good work! How were you able to make such an astute observation?"
"That's easy..." the third guy replied. "He can't wear regular glasses because he only has one eye and one ear."
I suspect it will be there December 18th as well. I think it's a werehouse.
He decides to break out during the day, figuring the guards will not suspect this. As he breaks through the ground to the surface, he finds himself in a preschool playground. He is surprised, but he rejoices anyway, shouting, "I'm free, I'm free!" At this a little girl approaches him, puts her hand on her hip, and says, "big deal! I'm four!"
We suspect that he cheats at limbo, but no one can prove it.
I suspect fowl play
They suspect a cereal killer.
Iโm suspecting people are Robin each otherโs content
The Police say thereโs no suspicious circumstances but Iโm beginning to suspect a cover-up.
Cops are working tirelessly to nab suspect
( from https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/oqtqy2/working_tirelessly/ )
From an email my cousin sent me:
I wanted to be a monk but I never got the chants.
I was kidnapped by mimes, they did unspeakable things to me.
The finest shoes are made of smooth leather, my opinion will never be suede.
A perfectionist walked into a bar - apparently it wasn't set high enough.
Man injured in bizarre peek-a-boo accident! He's in ICU.
Went to this horrible bar called "The Fiddle" ... it really was a vile inn.
To the thief who stole my glasses, I will find you - I have contacts.
If any of you knows how to fix hinges my door is always open.
Police car loses wheels to thief! Cops are working tirelessly to nab suspect.
Cold? Go stand in the corner, it's 90 degrees.
If your guy doesn't appreciate fresh fruit puns let that mango.
A few puns make me numb but math puns make me number.
My friend was explaining electricity and I was like "Watt"?
Someone threw a jar of mayo at me, I was like "What the hellman?"
Where did the Terminator find toilet paper? Aisle B, back.
Due to the quarantine I'll only be doing inside jokes.
They first suspected they had it when no one could smell what he was cooking.
https://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/uk-world-news/police-find-9000-suspected-dirty-24149081
Criminals hide money inside washing machine.
Dad: โWell Iโm no legal expert, but I suspect thereโd be some trees in there.โ
There suspected FOWL play
I never saw it coming, wouldnโt have suspected it
6 never did trust 7. Sure, they worked closely together, but 7 always seemed at odds with him. 6 always preferred the company of 4, a perfect 10 of a duo, even though 2 kept them apart. But when it came to 7? 6 always summed it up to bad luck. Then, 6 found the truth. 6 respected 9, even though lewd jokes always seemed to be made about the two. 6 found that 3 and himself could come together and be seen as equal to 9. When 9 was removed, 6 had a very negative feeling. Some were considered prime suspects in 9โs death. 2, 3, 5, and 7. 6 knew it had to be 7. His involvement with 9 added up two well. 6 snuck into 7โs house. He looked up from the floorboards, and found himself under 7. An admittedly inappropriate position for him, but 6 saw the proof he wanted: 9โs body, half devoured. 7 was a cannibal... 7 8 9. 6 has spent the remainder of his days terrified of 7, worried that someday 7 will learn what 6 knows... And promptly solve his problem.
The suspect used a starting pistol.
They say it was race related
The security guard suspected I was not the Real McCoy.
His colleagues began to suspect he was working undercover...
After a good dinner and a bottle of wine, they retire for the night, and go to sleep. Some hours later, Holmes wakes up and nudges his faithful friend.
"Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."
"I see millions and millions of stars, Holmes," replies Watson.
"And what do you deduce from that?"
Watson ponders for a minute.
"Well, astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful, and that we are a small and insignificant part of the universe. What does it tell you, Holmes?"
Holmes is silent for a moment. "Watson, you idiot!" he says. "Someone has stolen our tent!"
called me at work saying someone just stole her car out of the driveway. She didn't get a good look at the suspect but she got the plate number...
The police officer asks him to let him check his backpack.
The guy obliges.
In his backpack, the officer finds some textbooks, a calculator, a compass and a ruler.
"Aha!", shouts the policeman, "as I suspected. You are under arrest!"
"But why?" the guy protests.
"You have been caught carrying weapons of math instruction!"
Me: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Friend: Why?
Me: To visit the town idiot.
A few minutes later...
Me: Knock, Knock.
Friend: Whoโs there?
Me: The Chicken
You moan now but I suspect you are already planning to use this one.
Grandpa: Are you being safe with this Corona Virus issue?
Me: of coarse!
Grandpa: Very good, make sure you always have a mask on outside and carry a bunch of sand with you!
Me: I always have a mask on but why do I need sand?
Grandpa: You didn't hear about the sand? Its very effective! Wherever you suspect the virus is hiding, you grab a handful of sand and throw the sand at it to stone the virus to death!
I love my grandpa lol made me laugh
Apparently he was suspected of fowl play.
Donating 5 makes you a suspect
Fowl play suspected.
It looked like foul play. The mason wasnโt a suspect. He had a concrete alibi. The night of the accident he said he was with his girlfriend. She confirmed this. There was a wall of evidence. Consequently his alibi was rock solid and not just a facade. There was damning evidence that it was the plumber. They figured his alibi, that he was at the casino, wouldnโt hold water. But cameras showed fluid betting all night. This, obviously, threw a wrench in the investigation. The investigators followed a lead to the electrician. He had a shocking secret. It seems the electrician had been charged with battery only months earlier. But it was a dead end. They looked at the HVAC installer, but his alibi was airtight. Next, they tried to nail the Roofer, as he had been spouting off about the victim the day of the accident. But the roofer had been hammered all day. There was no way they could paint him as the cunning mastermind.
Then they saw the writing on the wall: the painter had both motive and opportunity. He was seen canvassing the accident site a few strokes before midnight when the accident occurred. The victim fell off a faulty ladder that was covered in finger paint. It seems the victim and the painter had a few brush-ins before. And it wasnโt a pretty picture. The painter was indicted, but despite all the evidence, the charges didnโt stick and the jury let him roll off clean.
After the checkup, my doctor recommended I up my coffee intake to two pots a day, eat more saturated fats, and start smoking.
I'm beginning to suspect he knows about me and his wife.
We suspect fowl play.
because of a certain case, which made it so that all the zoo animals had to stay in his bedroom. One of them keeps on waking him up, but heโs not sure which one. He goes to see an expert on similar situations like this. They go over which one is the most likely. The expert says:
โItโs not the fox, since those are quiet. Itโs also most likely not the monkeys, because these types sleep well.โ
They have a conversation like this, but the zookeeper keeps on wanting to talk about his elephant, which he loved and thought would never want to wake him up. The expert notices and plays along for a while, avoiding the subject until all other animals are no longer a suspect. The expert finally gets tired and asks the zookeeper:
โAre we going to talk about the elephant in the room?โ
I suspect theyโll use antimony.
I suspect he works for MacMafia
Don't worry. The suspect has been spotted.
The police suspect it was a hummucide.
He had a vice vise vice.
It helped him put the squeeze on suspects.
The first guy answers, "That's easy, we'll catch him fast because he only has one eye!"
The policeman says, "Well...uh...that's because the picture I showed is his side profile."
Slightly flustered by this ridiculous response, he flashes the picture for 5 seconds at the second guy and asks him, "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?"
The second guy smiles, flips his hair and says, "Ha! He'd be too easy to catch because he only has one ear!"
The policeman angrily responds, "What's the matter with you two?!!? Of course only one eye and one ear are showing because it's a picture of his side profile! Is that the best answer you can come up with?"
Extremely frustrated at this point, he shows the picture to the third guy and in a very testy voice asks, "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?
He quickly adds, "Think hard before giving me a stupid answer."
The third guy looks at the picture intently for a moment and says, "The suspect wears contact lenses."
The policeman is surprised and speechless because he really doesn't know himself if the suspect wears contacts or not.
"Well, that's an interesting answer. Wait here for a few minutes while I check his file and I'll get back to you on that."
He leaves the room and goes to his office, checks the suspect's file on his computer and comes back with a beaming smile on his face.
"Wow! I can't believe it. It's TRUE! The suspect does, in fact, wear contact lenses. Good work! How were you able to make such an astute observation?"
"That's easy..." the third guy replied. "He can't wear regular glasses because he only has one eye and one ear."
I suspect fowl play...
I suspect fowl play.
2,3,5, and 7 are considered to be prime suspects.
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