Guess you could call that the work of Natural Selection!
William DeFriend
Does that make it your... arch nemesis?
We will meat again!
His name was Mr.Takeout (before he killed himself with a mysterious bullet to the back of the head)
...I have to find a way to turn my life around before I start hitting the transmission fluid. That would shift my addiction into high gear.
I stared dead at them, pointed, and said "This means War!"
it's only a "soft" drink after all
He was finally doing the reading for his history class. "Did you know that Bin Laden was planning to blow up monuments in other American cities?"
"I bet St. Louis was next on his list," I nodded.
"How'd you know that, Dad?" he asked in surprise.
"Well, he was our arch-enemy."
A boy is resting on the trail back to camp as his dad waits for him and as I am walking by this happens...
Dad: "So when we get back to camp remind me to spray bug spray around your boots."
Son: "Why?"
Dad: "So that the ants wont climb up your pants and bite your candy ass."
"If they sold marijuana at the St. Louis Arch, it would literally be a gateway drug..."
It was the Arch.
It's my arch nemesis.
She claims it’s a gateway rug.
They're my arch-nemesis now.
I walked up to my coworker and said "I get 'no drugs' but what is the deal with mittens?"
He looked at me very concerned and said "Everyone knows mittens are a gateway glove!"
I work at a supplement retail store and usually greet people with "Hey! How are you today? What brings you in today?" and usually people will just tell me what they are looking for. So, I did the same thing to a man ~50 years old today, but instead of the usual response I get, he just responded with "My feet."
10/10. Would be dad-joked again.
Because of the higher-key
It's a gateway wine
What do you call an upbeat, positive robot?
Optimistic Prime
The voice on the radio explained how collecting rainwater was catching on in environmental groups. Some people upgraded from a 55 gallon barrel to a 500 gallon vessel. Shows that water vessels can be a real gateway jug.
Today at work a different FedEx delivery dude shows up, makes the "dude you got a Dell!" reference (since he was delivering a computer) and then proceeds to say how we don't see those commercials anymore because the actor was jailed for marijuana possession. Everyone heard it wrong and thought our normal guy was in jail, to which my boss replies, "Weed? I thought that was a Gateway drug!"
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Arch.
Arch who?
Bless you.
Your arch memesis.
We're out to dinner and a song comes on. Daughter: Mom, do you know this song. Wife: No, but it's Adele. Me: I thought it was a gateway. Groan and a pained face from the wife. I just smiled triumphantly.
Oh no! My arch nemesis!
