A little boy ran up to me " please help, my Dad is in a fight " I followed and we came across two men fighting. I said, " Ok, which one is your Dad ? " ..

.. " I dunno, that's what they're fighting about "

πŸ‘︎ 16k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2021
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The Chef at our local Italian Restaurant has died...

He pasta away

We cannoli do so much to help

His legacy will become a pizza history

Here today, gone tomato

Sending olive our prayers to the family

His wife, cheese still not over it

No more penne tration for her

πŸ‘︎ 47
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πŸ‘€︎ u/iNeedHealing24_7
πŸ“…︎ Apr 19 2021
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When the moon hits your eye, Like a big pizza pie, That's amore.

When an eel bites your hand, And that's not what you planned, That's a moray.

When our habits are strange, And our customs deranged, That's our mores.

When your horse munches straw, And the bales total four, That's some more hay.

When Othello's poor wife Becomes stabbed with a knife, That's a Moor, eh?

When a Japanese knight Uses his sword in a fight, That's Samurai.

When your sheep go to graze In a damp marshy place, That's a moor, eh?

When your boat comes home fine And you tie up her line, That's a moor, eh?

When you ace your last tests Like you did all the rest, That's some more "A"s!

In New Zealand you see An aborigine, That's a Maori.

Alley Oop's homeland has A space gun with pizzazz, That's a Moo Ray.

A comedian ham, With the name Amsterdam, That's a Morey.

When your chocolate graham, Is so full and so crammed, That s'more, eh.

When you've had quite enough, Of this dumb rhyming stuff, That's "No more!", eh?

πŸ‘︎ 684
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ComeAbout
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2020
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I would tell you a dad joke

But Maury Povich determined that I am not the father.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/eurotrashcc
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2021
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A man in an interrogation room says, β€œI’m not saying a word without my lawyer present!" The cop growls, "You ARE the lawyer!"

The lawyer shrieks, "Exactly! So where’s my present?!"

πŸ‘︎ 12k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2019
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