BKTB back again, check it, direct it, let’s begin. Well, we actually began on Monday so...let’s continue.
The Hall of Fame has unleashed their 2022 ballot on voters and included 13 new players for consideration. We’ve been doing this for four years now, I think most people understand what’s happening here. And for those who don’t, I promise it’s not complicated and you’ll figure it out pretty quickly.
Now let’s get started!
Justin Morneau
Bill James Hall of Fame Monitor: 56
Career bWAR: 27 (14 seasons)
Stats: .281/.348/.481, 349 2B, 247 HR, 772 R, 985 RBI, 120 OPS+
League Leading Stats: Games (163, 2008), Batting Ave (.319, 2014), Sac Flies (11, 2006), IBB (16, 2008)
Awards: All-Star x4 (2007-2010), Silver Slugger x2 (2006, 2008), ASG Home Run Derby Champ (2008), 2014 Batting Champion (NL), MVP (2006, AL)
Teams played for: Minnesota (2003-2013), Pittsburgh (2013), Colorado (2014-15), Chi Sox (2016)
Number of Concussions: banana
Justin Ernest George Morneau—the pride of New Westminster, British Columbia—would like you to know that he doesn’t need your stinking Hall of Fame vote. One of the ten best players to come from the frozen tundra, Morneau has already been enshrined in the Canadian Baseball Hall of Fame, receiving the honor in 2020.
According to Morneau’s Wikipedia page (which I am not discounting the possibility of having been written by Morneau himself), he played catcher for his youth baseball teams and was a goalie on the school hockey teams growing up, dabbling in basketball as well. He was a member of back-to-back National Champion baseball teams in 1997-98, being named the best hitter of the Championships in the latter season. He played a season of Junior League hockey as a third-string goalie in 1998, before dropping the puck and picking up a catcher's mitt full time the following spring, after the Twins drafted him in the third round (89th overall pick) in the 1999 draft. Prior to leaving the sport, Morneau said he figured hockey had been responsible for giving him “a couple” of concussions in his youth, but that’s not the kind of thing that tends to come back to haunt a guy, so why even talk about it now?
Morneau would go on to club minor league pitching like a bunch of baby seals, posting identical 1.018 OPS marks at the Rookie and A-ball levels, and hitting a combined 60 homers and 139 RBI across AA and AAA and being ranked as a Baseball America to
... keep reading on reddit ➡I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.
Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.
Do your worst!
I'm surprised it hasn't decade.
For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.
I said "hey look, an escaPEA"
No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!
Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂
It really does, I swear!
They’re on standbi
Pilot on me!!
Nothing, he was gladiator.
Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.
This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.
If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.
Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.
What did 0 say to 8 ?
" Nice Belt "
So What did 3 say to 8 ?
" Hey, you two stop making out "
I won't be doing that today!
[Removed]
This morning, my 4 year old daughter.
Daughter: I'm hungry
Me: nerves building, smile widening
Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.
She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.
Thank you all for listening.
There hasn't been a post all year!
You take away their little brooms
It’s pronounced “Noel.”
After all his first name is No-vac
What, then, is Chinese rap?
Edit:
Notable mentions from the comments:
-
Spanish/Swedish/Swiss/Serbian hits
-
French/Finnish art
-
Country/Canadian rap
-
Chinese/Country/Canadian rock
-
Turkish/Tunisian/Taiwanese rap
There hasn't been a single post this year!
(Happy 2022 from New Zealand)
Nothing, it just waved
Him: I can explain everything!
(It's his best joke yet I think)
Bob
So that I could frequently say, "I am going to walk 5 miles now."
Edit: My most popular post on Reddit! 😀 Thank you for the awards.
Just to clarify, 12345678
It was about a weak back.
Me grabbing a soda from my (what I thought was) half full 12pk...
Notices there's only 2;
Me: "Awe man... This is a damn bird box!" Her: "What the hell does that mean?!" Me: (Pulls both cans out & shows them to her) "It's only got Toucans."
I'm not ashamed to admit the look on her face was glorious.
I was just sitting there doing nothing.
But nobody ever mentions his sister, Onya, who invented the starter pistol.
“BOOM”?!
When I got home, they were still there.
