My doctor is the master of dad jokes

I wasn't feeling well and I suspected some intestinal blockage to be the culprit. Naturally, I made an appointment with my doctor. I'm in the treatment room waiting when he comes in.

Doc: Not feeling well huh? What do you think it is?

Me: I'm not sure but I've had weird bowel movements I think it's blockage

Doc: I don't believe you

Me: wut

Doc: you're lying to me

Me: no seriously doc I'm blocked up here

Doc: I know, you're full of shit

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2016
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Set the gf up perfectly

I was tired and lying in bed, trying to get some motivation to go to the gym when I thought of a great idea to dadjoke the girlfriend

"Hey babe, can you blow on me?"

"Huh? What?"

"Yeah, just blow on me. Twice please."

She gives me a wtf is going look, but humors me anyway and blows some air on my palm

"One more time please"

Suspiciously blows on my palm again

"...Damn, thought that would have worked. Still waiting to catch my 2nd wind!"

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bigchipshi
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2014
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