Yesterday I got kicked out of yoga class.
My instructor said you need to go.
I said namaste
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︎ Apr 13 2021
Harry Potter was kicked out of Hogwarts.
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︎ Apr 30 2021
Got kicked out of the zoo for feeding the ducks....
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︎ Mar 03 2021
A fungus was kicked out of his colony and asked why ... his friend replied:
You just donβt fit the mould.
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︎ Apr 03 2021
Joe Biden's dog, Major, was kicked out for biting a staffer. I guess you could say he was...
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︎ Mar 12 2021
Why was James Bond kicked out of a toilet?
Because it was not agent's toilet.
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︎ Mar 13 2021
My daughter was watching The Little Mermaid so I asked her if she knew why Sebastian was kicked out of college?
It's because all his grades where under da c
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︎ Jan 17 2021
Have you heard about the chicken that got kicked out because it was too big?
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︎ Feb 06 2021
I ran out of toilet paper last week and can't afford to buy more till I get paid next week, so I started using the newspapers. Now the realisation has kicked in......
......... The Times are really Rough!!!
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︎ Dec 16 2020
Why was the mermaid kicked out of Geometry class?
She forgot her Algae-bra.
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︎ Dec 09 2020
I got kicked out of my poetry club because I made too many Linkin Park references
But who could rock a rhyme like this?
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︎ Dec 30 2020
I finally kicked out my girlfriend about six months ago, and it's been nothing but Happy Days for me since.
The bitch took all the other box sets.
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︎ Jan 03 2021
Why was Sam the bard kicked out of the Apple store?
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︎ Dec 24 2020
I was reciting A, C, and E music notes in a bar. They kicked me out ...
They said no Minor allowed here . ..
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︎ Dec 25 2020
Today, I got kicked out of my "Flat Earth" Facebook group...
I just wanted to know if the '6 feet apart' social distancing guideline was pushing anyone over the edge.
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︎ Aug 03 2020
I got kicked out of the park for lining squirrels up by height...
They said I was too critter-sizing
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︎ Oct 23 2020
I may have been kicked out of my local watch shop for throwing the merchandise around, but I can confirm...
Time does fly when youβre having fun!
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︎ Oct 20 2020
Why did Cinderella get kicked out of the soccer game?
She ran away from the ball.
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︎ Aug 19 2020
What did lady Macbeth say when she kicked her misbehaving dog out of her room?
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︎ Jul 30 2020
I kicked my lad out because he told me he now identifies as a cow
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︎ Jul 21 2020
I got kicked out of the Farmerβs Market today.
I was disturbing the peas.
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︎ Aug 26 2020
I got kicked out of the library for being too noisy
I tried to explain to them that I was just reading a book but the librarian said there's no reading aloud.
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︎ Aug 04 2020
I got kicked out of a funeral for having an erection
Jeez, canβt a guy have mourning wood?
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︎ May 20 2020
Why did the elephants get kicked out of the swimming pool?
They couldn't keep their trunks up!
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︎ Jul 22 2020
I got kicked out of karaoke after singing βDanger Zoneβ nine times in a row.
Too many Loggins attempts.
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︎ Dec 21 2019
I got a buddy that keeps getting kicked out of bars but he always comes back
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︎ Jul 18 2020
My drunk friend was kicked out of Karaoke for singing βDanger Zoneβ 7 times in a row.
He had exceeded the maximum number of Loggins attempts.
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︎ May 27 2018
I was going to be a doctor but they kicked me out of med school when they found out I was a coward...
The dean said, "It takes guts to learn anatomy."
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︎ Jul 02 2020
I got kicked out of school for getting married.
I was going for my bachelorβs degree.
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︎ Mar 25 2020
Why did the clock get kicked out of the library?
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︎ Dec 08 2019
They kicked me out of art school when my sculpture didn't work out as planned.
I reached my statue of limitations.
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︎ Feb 05 2020
Nine ants were kicked out of the apartment complex
Because they were not tenants.
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︎ Nov 05 2019
I once farted in an Apple Store. They kicked me out because they didin't have Windows
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︎ Sep 03 2019
Did you hear about the landscaper that got kicked out of college?
They found him changing grades.
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︎ Apr 27 2020
Why was the toilet kicked out of class?
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︎ May 11 2020
My wife just kicked me out of the house
Her exact words were, "I'm Aaron out the house today"
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︎ May 02 2020
Why did the German sales team get kicked out of the sausage convention?
They were the wurst people.
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︎ Mar 26 2020
What happens when you get kicked out of a serial killer fan club?
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︎ Feb 25 2020
Why did pelican get kicked out of the restaurant
Because he had a large bill
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︎ Nov 23 2019
Why was the duck kicked out of his psychology lecture.
He kept calling the professor a quack.
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︎ Jan 05 2020
Why was the mermaid kicked out of Geometry class?
She forgot her Algae-bra.
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︎ Nov 12 2020
I just got kicked out of the flat earth society
I asked if the 6 feet social distancing guidelines pushed anyone over the edge.
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︎ Aug 03 2020
Great, just got kicked out of the karaoke bar for singing Danger Zone five times.
Apparently I exceeded the maximum number of attempted Loggins.
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︎ Apr 25 2020
I just got kicked out of karaoke night for singing "Danger Zone" six times in a row...
They said I exceeded my maximum number of Loggins attempts...
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︎ Oct 13 2017
I just got kicked out of Karaoke night for singing "Danger Zone" six times in a rowβ¦
They said I exceeded my maximum number of Loggins attempts.
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︎ Apr 06 2017
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