A, B, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, & Z are all racists.. How do I know?

Because they're all not 'C's.

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RedPlanetCorridor
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2019
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I used to read pirated editions of J.R.R. Tolkien.

It was a bad Hobbit.

πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThusSpokeGaba
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2021
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Is there anyone who would act in a movie based on J.R.R Tolkien's The Silmarillion?

Elijah Wood

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2021
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A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y,Z

Happy No L!

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/big_macaroons
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2020
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Can I play World War Z without having played World War A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X and Y before? /r/ShouldIbuythisgame/com…
πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JonaSavage17
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2020
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J.R.R. Tolkien used to write his novels in his free time.

They were his hobbits.

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2018
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I'm writing a fantasy novel like the works of J.R.R. Tolkien.

It's called The Similarillion.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Warrenio
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2016
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A deer, B deer, C deer, D deer,...

... E deer, F deer, G deer, H deer, I deer, J deer, K deer, L deer, M deer, N deer, P deer, Q deer, R deer, S deer, T deer, U deer, V deer, W deer, X deer, Y deer and Z deer.

Wait.. did I miss one out? O deer

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OPettz
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2022
🚨︎ report
A boy raises his hand in class and asks the teacher if he can be excused to use the bathroom, the teacher says..

β€˜yes but just to prove you’ve been paying attention I’d like you to recite the alphabet first’

So with his best effort the boy replies β€˜A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O Q R S T U V W X Y Z’

The teacher says β€˜very good but what happened to the P?’

β€˜Well this took so long it’s running down my leg’

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2021
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Oman! You’re about to read some terrible stuff.

β€œI live in Spain without the β€˜s’”.

This inspired me to come up with some truly terrible country-related jokes.

It’s about to Bahrain jokes without the β€œBah”.

  1. I have a double China without the β€œa”.

  2. Some people have told me that I look a lot like a German without the β€œan”.

  3. Oman, I think that one conspiracy about Israel Israel.

  4. You all probably want to hit me with Japan without the β€œJ”.

  5. You probably can’t Kuwait to stop reading these without the β€œKu”.

  6. Nowadays, car companies are focusing on making electric cars, but I Madagascar.

  7. As you’ve probably guessed, I don’t even have one Nepal without the β€œNe”.

All of these bad jokes made me Hungary so Iran to the nearest shop to get some food. Why am I always India-r need of food?

I sincerely apologise, fellow people. These jokes probably left a painful Denmark on your souls without the β€œDen”, of course.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/anipanreads
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2020
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I was expecting a photo of his grandkids.

https://i.imgur.com/42ZEKqJ.jpg

(x-post from /r/funny)

πŸ‘︎ 36
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cybersteel8
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2015
🚨︎ report
My son's first dad joke

My wife, 2 year old son, and I were traveling this past week and went through a drive thru for lunch. After finishing his meal, my son was trying to figure out what the bag said. Not being able to turn around and see what he is seeing, the following exchange took place.

Wife "Do you know what the letters are on the bag?"

Son "Yes!"

Wife " Tell me what the letters are"

Son "A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z!"

Me "Was that his first dad joke?"

Wife "He is definitely your son" and rolled her eyes.

πŸ‘︎ 31
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πŸ‘€︎ u/steveh28
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2014
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Cortana is the ultimate dad...

Knock knock jokes:

http://i.imgur.com/FbhaoJR.png

http://i.imgur.com/lV4fkX5.png

http://i.imgur.com/KhMJWE1.png

http://i.imgur.com/u5bGCKl.png

http://i.imgur.com/WV0ozHa.png

http://i.imgur.com/bnbQwMh.png

Regular jokes:

http://i.imgur.com/FSpBRve.png

http://i.imgur.com/BimhVEg.png

http://i.imgur.com/hmT1VXU.png

http://i.imgur.com/mOtfMsH.png

http://i.imgur.com/qHmY3BG.png

http://i.imgur.com/fc3M93G.png

http://i.imgur.com/IGErA97.png

http://i.imgur.com/DCN90VQ.png

http://i.imgur.com/zG5hetR.png

http://i.imgur.com/Ff1x8Zm.png

http://i.imgur.com/tUKALrn.png

http://i.imgur.com/0Coe17Y.png

http://i.imgur.com/S7gltN7.png

http://i.imgur.com/Pjs3xjN.png

http://i.imgur.com/VPnE7bJ.png

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2015
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A little Christmas song. A B C D E F G H I J K M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

NO L, NO L, NO L, NO L, NO L, NO L...

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/December_Soul
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2020
🚨︎ report
I have updated the alphabet for festive period. A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, Z

No-el no-L

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RikM
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2019
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Teacher: Sing the alphabet.

Student: A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, phosphorus, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, Z.

Teacher: How did you say phosphorus instead of L, M, N, O, and P?

Student: Because phosphorus is EL-EM-EN-TAL P.

πŸ‘︎ 35
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sarcasticpremed
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2021
🚨︎ report
I commissioned an artist to make me a set of letters of the alphabet out of cast iron.

I received A, B, C, D, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, and Z.

I'm missing the iron E.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tratemusic
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2021
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Have you ever heard the middle-class alphabet?

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Bourgeoisie.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bonanza86
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2020
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