Just seen the police arrest a dog that was giving birth at the side of the road.
Apparently it was littering.
A theif has been stealing all the wheels from police cars
The police has been working tirelessly to get him
I have a friend with no social skills and a Ph.D in the history of palindromes.
I'm pretty good at history but I recently read about a Nazi war criminal who I'd never heard of before.
His name didn't ring any Gö- bells.
The police suspected that my daughter accidentally burnt our house down
The police just showed up at my house and arrested my bottle of water. They said he was wanted in 3 states...
Did you know that Olive branch is a symbol of peace. People were using olive branch during the history to declare truce by giving it to their enemies
If you are wondering how I know this, it's because olive random trivia
The police pulled over a semi going 120 mph on the interstate. Upon opening the trailer, they found thousands of ancient cutting tools similar to an axes but with the cutting edges perpendicular to the handle rather than parallel.
I just watched a documentary on the history of the WD-40.
The police found a stolen car that had a nearly complete set of golf clubs inside...
They're still looking for the driver!
What did the police officer say to his belly button?
There's a programme about the history of perfume on TV tonight.
It's on at 8pm on Chanel Number 5!
What did the Police penguin say to the penguin that got in trouble?
I've recently started writing an Ebook about the history of citrus fruits.
It's nowhere near finished, but the first chapter's on lime.
Police are warning electric car drivers their cars have enough charge for the entire journey.
If you run out of electricity, you could be charged.
Why did the peanut go to the police?
If you’re being chased by a police dog, try not to go through a tunnel, then on to a little seesaw, then jump through a hoop of fire.
They're trained for that!
(Mj)
Back in the 90s,there was a man stealing tyres from police cars belonging to my precinct.
We had to work tirelessly to find the culprit.
My GF dressed up as a police woman and told me I was under arrest under the suspicion that I was good in bed c
After 3 mins all charges were dropped due to lack of evidence
Someone broke into our local police station and stole all the urinals.
Police say they have nothing to go on.
The police turned up at my house last night and arrested my dog!
Turns out he has unpaid barking tickets
A police recruit was asked during the exam, "What would you do if you had to arrest your own wife?"
He said, "Call for back-up!!"
If I made a bot that spams every person who claims to be a member of the Pun Police with puns...
it would be a fully automatic machine pun.
How did the police identify the body of a dead monk?
They checked his transcen-dental records.
Today I read a pamphlet on the history of incandescent bulbs...
Who was the most jovial conqueror in human history?
What are police cars made of?
I’m reading a book on the history of glue....
I can’t seem to put it down.
Two drunk guys were about to get into a brawl. One of the guys grabs a stick and draws a line in the dirt and says "If you cross this line, I'll hit you in the face"
today there was an artist found dead by the police
the details are a little sketchy
Why did the ukulele call the police?
Because the guitar was FRETning him
Grandma is always saying to me ' Hey what's the name of that German guy again who keeps taking my stuff '
Alzheimer, Grandma, it's Alzheimer.
NEWS FLASH! The toilet has been stolen from the local police station.
Police say they've got nothing to go on.
How can you tell that the band “The Police” don’t like hot donuts?
They said you don’t have to put on the red light
Someone is stealing tires off of police cars in my area
The police are working tirelessly to arrest him.
What do cannibals serve at the beginning of dinner party?
SpongeBob may be the main character of the show.
I just said "No comment" all the way through a police interview.
I asked my German friend if he knew the square root of 81.
The one and only acceptable way of advertising
A police officer just came to the door and said he was looking for a man with one eye.
I told him he would probably find him faster he used both.
Did you hear about the criminal who only steals wheels from police cars?
The cops are working tirelessly to catch him
We had barely started an evening at the anecdote club when police kicked the door in.
It was a two story building.
The police arrested a dog for giving birth on the street.
The police arrested a dog for giving birth on the side of the road ...
They charged her with littering!
What did the police officer say to his belly button?
I’ve just started my new book: ‘the history of glue’
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