Guest room Puns

room R has it

Clerk responds, "No problem, sir. This room is called 'The Lobby'"

The Shinzo Abe Lincoln Bedroom.

A little background: my husband and I have always had to stay in the makeshift bedroom in the basement when we visited my parents because we would visit during holidays and the nice upstairs guest room would always be taken by people older than us. We are visiting them this weekend and my mom texted me to let us know that we will be using the guest room for the first time.

Me: Oh nice, we get to sleep in the guest room instead on the air mattress in the basement.

Husband: It looks like we're moving up in the world!

Me: -groan-

Got wife good tonight. She had just laid out all the kid's Xmas presents in the guest room with sacks and wrapping paper, scissors, etc and instructed me how she wanted it done.

Then our daughter barges in. Wife scrambles to cover the gifts. So I say:

> "Mommies and Daddies need privacy sometimes. We have sacks in here!"

So my dad gets free gas once a week from the company he works for. Last night my 10 year old brother asks him Bro: Dad, do you ever have to pay for gas? Dad: Yeah, sometimes I have to sleep in the guest room I actually chuckled

My earliest recollection of a dad joke is when I was about 6/7 years old.

We'd just waved bye to the last guests at my party. Understandably, my parents were beyond exhausted, but tidied up anyway. After all was done, we sat in the living room and my dad pulled out a chair from the dining room. He then brought another, and placed it next to it. He did the same again. I had no idea what was going on, until he sat across all three, threw his hands in the air and shouted:

"Three chairs for dad!"

Absolute quality, textbook dad.

I work as a front desk associate for a major hotel chain that has a rewards program, but the guest checking in, a Mr. Zingone, didn't have it on his reservation. I tried searching for it several different ways, just the surname "Zingone," just his phone number, but ultimately could not find his account information.

So I told him, "Well, you may have had a membership, but it looks like it's... Zin-gone..."

He told me no more humor, just get me to my room. I think he was just as impressed, however.

Me: Yeah, I figured you could use the space like that, if you didn't wanna just make it into a guest room.

Dad: No. Though I might put a Murphy Bed in there.

Me: Eh... I don't trust Murphy Beds.

Dad: Why not?

Me: Because with those, everything that can go wrong will.

Dad: Who has a square house with four south-facing walls?

Teenaged Son: Come on dad, you've told me this before, it's Santa Claus.

Dad: Nope, he's fake. We do. The living room, kitchen, master bedroom, and guest bedroom all have south facing walls.

Teenaged Son: [groan]

She said "This one's queen. It goes in the guest room."

"Of course it's queen, it just came out of the wash!"

This is my dad's favorite one. Whenever someone comes over and asks for the bathroom, he says:

Dad: you mean the international room?

Guest: uh, no the bathroom..

Dad: well you see its the international room because.. When you are going there you are Russian, when inside European, and when you walk out you are Finish..

Guest: oh god....

:D