a nice dinner date
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lirocat
πŸ“…︎ Sep 29 2020
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Pescatarian date dumped me when I made a steak dinner.

Well, that's fine. At least I've got a lot of other fish in the sea.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/trste
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2020
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Went to my date’s house after dinner last night and saw she had a Soviet flag covering the entire wall

I knew that was a big red flag

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Smoothmcdoodles
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2019
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My wife has this weird OCD where she arranges the dinner plates by the date they were bought.

It’s an extremely rare dish order.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2019
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I finally went to talk to the super cute girl who works in the Egyptian super market.

Her: What can I do for you?

Me: I'm looking for a date.

Her: Oh, what kind of dates?

Me: Uhmm, just dinner and a movie :)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Gliscor_dude
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2021
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How about some corona/quarantine themed names for a creole/Cajun restaurant?

Quarantine has us missing our date nights out so I’m cooking a special dinner while she has an appointment and I’m going to turn our kitchen into a restaurant. Or even just some NOLA / bayou pun names would be good.

Would love a little help

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Han_Solo_Cup
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2020
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A road for cars meets a road for bikes on tinder

After some talking they decide to go out on a date.

After a nice dinner the road for bikes invites the road for cars to his appartement.

They get upstairs, but instead of going to the bedroom, the road for bikes stabs en kills the road for cars cold-blooded.

Turns out, he was a real cycle path

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πŸ‘€︎ u/StijnSteen
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2019
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Batman

On our eighth date together myself and my wife went to see the new batman film. Previously all our other dates were meals out. So it went Dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner Batman!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/matc7884
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2019
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My Parents Dating Life Summed Up

"Your mum and I went on quite a few dates before we got engaged. I took her out for dinner eight times and went to the cinema once to see Batman.

So, to sum up our dating life it went dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner BATMAN!"

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mullza
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2015
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The bride-to-be and her soon-to-be mother-in-law didn't agree on much during the wedding planning

Both being from Texas, the MIL wanted something BIG and fancy. And the BTB wanted more of a traditional outdoors gathering. They couldn't even agree on what to serve their guests for dinner. As the date approached, they were barely speaking to each other.

In the end, it was a chili reception.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Possum
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2017
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So this is a pretty long joke...

So there were these two high schoolers, both madly in love. they were like the most well known couple around the school. so a couple months go by after they've began dating and they both see a flier in the hallway. it talks about the up coming school dance which is taking place next week. so naturally, the guy asks the girl to come with him. she says yes and the planing begins. he gets home that night and surfs the entire web for a relatively cheap limo company with still have decent amenities. after ordering that, he heads off to the local tailor and gets a suit made for in his girlfriends favourite colour, blue. then the week passes and he preparing to go and pick her up, so he picks up the flowers he bought her earlier that day and heads out to the now parked limo. he gets in and orders the driver to her house. he gets there and gives her the flowers. they go out for dinner at a very fancy place, him paying for everything. they both finally get to the school hall and head in to see all their friends. they have a wonderful night, dancing, having photos taken, they both really just enjoyed themselves. they even got elected prom king and queen! so the night is coming to an end and they both decide to sit down and have a rest. the girls feeling a bit thirsty so the guy heads over to the refreshments table to get her a drink. it's pretty quite there as in this joke, there isnt a punchline. ( Ν‘Β° ΝœΚ– Ν‘Β°)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RustyTyrant
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2019
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Classic dadjoke from me, a dad!

Was at the dinner table with the kids and wife eating dinner (oddly enough). The kids and I were getting a little rambunctious. My wife says 'no yelling at the table!' I immediately put my face to the table and say 'sorry table'.

I still laugh when I think about it. My best to date. Maybe it was just the timing.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Erotsreeb
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2015
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Growing up we were quite poor and loved pasta.

My Dad would get us excited by telling us we would get pasta for dinner. We would end up eating whatever was in the discount bin.

Dad: Kids, we're having pasta for dinner! Us: Yay! Dad: Pasta-used-by-date!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/so0ty
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2014
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My little sister just dad-joked my dad.

We were at the table, and my mom and dad were talking about when they were dating, and my dad says, "You know what? She's only made me 2 bad meals the entire time we've been married."

Then my little sister goes, "Yea, lunch and dinner."

We cracked up about it and we're still giggling.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SwingingSalmon
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2014
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Dad-joked my girlfriend at dinner

After finding some time for a date night/sexy time in our busy schedules we went out to dinner at Qdoba because we're too cheap to afford much else right now. While eating my burrito I must have chomped down HARD on the aluminum foil and my lip started bleeding.

She looks at me and says "Irony: we plan a night to have sex and you cut your lip on a burrito."

I responded "Iron-y: the taste of my kisses tonight."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/armistice90
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2014
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It's worth the read!

I should preface this by saying this was on of the best dates I've ever been on, but the relationship also subsequently fell apart because of it.

Anyway, a few years ago, my girlfriend and I had been going out for a few months, and things were great. I met her through a mutual friend of mine at the hospital, weirdly enough. Our friend had gotten in a very bad accident and had to get a glass eye. He would always dab it with cotton to stop the bleeding at the beginning. Anyway, this is all relevant because my girlfriend (not girlfriend at the time) bonded over how disgusting our friends eye was. This got us to talking, and before you know it, we started going out. Things got pretty serious months and months down the line, and I was just laid off from my job. This meant that in general, we would go on cheaper dates. Nothing too drastic. Just like a movie and dinner instead of say the Opera and a fancy five star restaurant.

So, about a year and a half into the relationship, Joe, the mutual friend of ours, suggests a double date with us and his girlfriend. He knew the situation I was in and offered to pay for the whole thing. Great right? Well... no. I was actually planning on proposing to my girlfriend. Except Joe suggested the plans in front of my girlfriend too, so she accepted for both of us. I didn't want to propose to her on a double date, so I pulled her aside and told her to just skip the date and come over instead. Joe had bought us all tickets to a baseball game, and believe it or not, my girlfriend chose the baseball game instead of me. I stayed home alone as she went out with Joe and his girlfriend. Moral of the story is, if it hadn't been for Cotton Eyed Joe, I'd been married a long time ago.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/herper
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2015
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Got my girlfriend pretty good today

So I've been dating this Jewish girl for a while, (I'm catholic) and the other day we were talking about getting dinner. The conversation went as follows.

Me - "I think we're picking up dinner at mi pueblo"

Her- "I've never been there"

Me- "It's good."

Her- "I'm not the biggest Mexican person though sooo"

Me- "No, you're actually a rather small Jewish person"

Her- "...."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Goodguyjack2
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2015
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There was a boy who really liked tractors...

Tractors were his biggest hobby. He had lots of toy tractors and on weekends he would go and watch the farmers drive their tractors around in the fields. As he grew older, he still liked tractors, but not as much because he started to find other interests. When he turned 20 he met a beautiful girl and fell in love. One night he decided to take her out for dinner to a local restaurant. As they were eating, the whole room started to fill up with smoke. Everyone was panicking so he jumped up and said "calm down, I've got this!". He stood on his chair and sucked in all the smoke in the room, then walked outside and blew it all out. When he returned back into the resturant, his date said to him "oh my god how did you do that?!" To which he replied: "I'm an ex-tractor fan."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mortoson
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2015
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Youth Pastor got me on this one after I made a joke involving my waitress girlfriend.

Facebook post:

We've only been dating a little less than 6 months, in high school, and she's already serving me dinner for the 4th time.

His comment (Father of 4 kids):

I've heard of second breakfast, but fourth dinner? Aren't you full yet?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ACEmat
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2014
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