Comédie Italienne Puns

[Notes : September 25]

• demonstrating empathy for an algorithm is the single most ridiculous thing I've heard after hearing someone say they made out with a statue while high one day. We can demonstrate empathy for anything, which can be a blessing just as much as a curse. <[Yes but what about Electriology?] Until we can observe empathy demonstrated by algorithms, they should not be treated the same, as part as the golden rule. <[The golden rule says to treat others as you'd like to be treated, not to treat others as they treat you.] Consider me part of the silver rule then. Treat others as you'd like to be treated until these others take advantage of you for it and then subsequently justify your sudden ignorance of the golden rule as you've only achieved enlightenment at the silver rule which temporarily excludes the golden rule until further notice. Jesus got angry at the Temple for people doing what they did best, selling things for profit. This is why it makes sense to offer the other cheek. If you're going to get angry at someone for doing what they do best, you may not reciprocate their anger when they get angry at you for doing best what you do best. Which is preaching love in Jesus's case.

[Notes : September 27]

• BoneAppleTea is a public manifestation of malaprops.

• the difference between a sect and a cult is theology.

[Notes : September 28]

• how long will it take before blind, deaf and stuttering people can run for office?

• I understand the traditions underlying real life storytelling as opposed to "book learning" but written literature is a tool, it helps preserve a message and the lack of it in certain cultures has caused problems. Although I have an immense respect for word of mouth and although this is the best marketing strategy because, humans, I still think keeping records in the form of books or even just audio/visual records can be useful too, especially in this sort of society where people are slowly forgetting the art of storytelling, because they don't need it anymore, unless the sun is to EMP the electric grid out of us one day. If we should receive <[revive] storytelling and memorizing is another question.

• we probably should.

• computers surely allow us to forget memorizing. So allow for this prediction; should we rely on computers to a degree where all our decisions derive from them, one single catastrophic event in the world of electriology would set us back a few millennias.

[Notes : September

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂

It really does, I swear!

Buenosdillas

They’re on standbi

Pilot on me!!

Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.

This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.

If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.

Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.

When I got home, they were still there.

I won't be doing that today!

[Removed]

This morning, my 4 year old daughter.

Daughter: I'm hungry

Me: nerves building, smile widening

Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.

She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.

Thank you all for listening.

You take away their little brooms

There hasn't been a post all year!

Why

It’s pronounced “Noel.”

After all his first name is No-vac

What, then, is Chinese rap?

Edit:

Notable mentions from the comments:

• Spanish/Swedish/Swiss/Serbian hits

• French/Finnish art

• Country/Canadian rap

• Chinese/Country/Canadian rock

• Turkish/Tunisian/Taiwanese rap

There hasn't been a single post this year!

(Happy 2022 from New Zealand)

Nothing, it just waved

Him: I can explain everything!

(It's his best joke yet I think)

Bob

So that I could frequently say, "I am going to walk 5 miles now."

Edit: My most popular post on Reddit! 😀 Thank you for the awards.

Just to clarify, 12345678

Me grabbing a soda from my (what I thought was) half full 12pk...

Notices there's only 2;

Me: "Awe man... This is a damn bird box!" Her: "What the hell does that mean?!" Me: (Pulls both cans out & shows them to her) "It's only got Toucans."

I'm not ashamed to admit the look on her face was glorious.

Do your worst!

What did 0 say to 8 ?

" Nice Belt "

So What did 3 say to 8 ?

" Hey, you two stop making out "