C'mon, friends, I don't have nearly enough of you :D

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WELCOME, AND HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

Hello all, and welcome to the 2021 Holiday MegaSale brought to you by Wraithmarked Creative, Mountaindale Press, Aethon Books, Shadow Alley Press, and Portal Books!

If you didn't know, this year we've turned the sale into a charity event to support St. Jude Children's Research Hospital!

ST. JUDE & DONATION BY AUTHORS:

While last year this was only a holiday sale, this year:

• Each of our 150+ participating authors has agreed to donate at least $0.01 per book they sell or give away!

AND:

• All five sponsoring publishers have agreed to each donate at least $0.01 per book sold or given away SALE-WIDE.

That means every book you buy/pick up for free net's St. Jude at least $0.05 in donations! If we only do as well as last year, we are likely to raise over $10,000 USD for the Hospital!

For those of you who aren't familiar with the organization, St. Jude's mission statement reads as follows:

The mission of St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital is to advance cures, and means of prevention, for pediatric catastrophic diseases through research and treatment. Consistent with the vision of our founder Danny Thomas, no child is denied treatment based on race, religion or a family's ability to pay.

So, every book you pick up helps further R&D of pediatric disease prevention and treatment!

(If you'd like to donate directly, check it out here!)

MEGASALE INFO:

Nothing excessive here, just a bit of information!

1. This event will run for 48hrs, through December 26th and 27th, 2021.
   1. If you missed the sale, but are reading this within a few days of this post, still check the links below. Many of the books are discounted through the new year.
2. All 400+ books listed below should be free or $0.99 in the US and free or £0.99 in the UK at LEAST.
   1. If any book is NOT listed for these prices, please ping me (u/BryceOConnor) and I will see it removed. With so many books in this MegaSale, there's bound to have be

#Artist: Mach-Hommy

#Album: Pray For Haiti

##Listen:

• Spotify
• Apple Music
• YouTube
• bandcamp

##Background:

Over the past 5 years Mach-Hommy has released a barrage of new age boom-bap projects: from his Griselda debut ‘Haitian Body Odor’ in 2016, to the colossal 2017 wave of ‘Dump Gawd: Hommy Edition’, ‘Luh Hertz’, ‘Fete De Morts’, ‘The G.A.T.’ and numerous more, his 2018 and 2019 releases including ‘Bulletproof Luh’ and ‘Wap Konn Jòj!’, as well as 2020’s ‘Mach’s Hard Lemonade’. Staying quiet after the release of MHL, photos emerged Christmas Day of Mach-Hommy and Westside Gunn together, showing the two had reconciled after a falling out following the release of HBO. After this Gunn announced various albums on Twitter, including a Mach release under Griselda, titled HBO 2 in the tweet. On Easter Sunday, Gunn released ‘Easter GunnDay 4’, featuring Mach-Hommy, in which it was proclaimed that the two would be dropping a project titled ‘Pray For Haiti’. Photos and footage of work on the album in Puerto Rico showed collaboration with the likes of Camoflauge Monk, SadhuGold and Westside Gunn himself. It was announced the album would drop on Haitian Flag Day, May 18th. Despite this, it wasn’t until the following Friday, May 21st, that the album was finally released.

##Review:

When first announced ‘Pray For Haiti’ featured a Jean Michel Basquiat piece as it’s artwork, a precursory glance at the album’s Haitian imagery (the artist’s parents were Haitian and Puerto Rican). The colourful painting, Untitled (Fishing), features a skeletal, black fisherman, a scri

This is a transcription of a Dharma talk given by Master Jingzong, shared on r/PureLand a while back by /u/iPorkChop. I've had an affinity for this Dharma talk for a while, so I figured I'd copy it down and share it with you. I have made some edits for grammar and readability. The source is here.

Namo Amitabha Buddha!

There are no losses in reciting the Buddha's name, which means that people who recite for their whole life are assured rebirth, and those belonging to the lowest grade who recite only ten times are also assured rebirth. Some may think, "They only recited one to ten times and can attain rebirth, while we need to recite for our whole lives, aren't we at a disadvantage?"

There are these kind of people asking such questions. Why and how can this be asked? It's like saying, "Aiya! This guy managed to reunite with his parents at his deathbed, while I have my parents for my whole life, I am at a disadvantage!" Isn't it good to have your parents for your whole life? You have parents to care and love you. The other guy only managed to recognize his parents at the end. He is the one that is pitiful, getting bullied for his whole life, being badly battered with no clothes to wear, being dirty and broken with no one caring or teaching him. You are educated with family taking care of you throughout your life, isn't that good? Yet you say he is at a disadvantage.

Reciting the Buddha's name for your whole life is equivalent to having parents throughout your life. Reciting ten times at the end is equivalent to only reuniting with your parents at the end. That is a very sad thing, he's a poor orphan. Master Huijing said that we are actually not at a disadvantage. It's like breathing air. If he only has a lifespan of one to ten recitations of the Buddha's name, he is only able to to recite the Buddha's name one to ten times. If his life were extended, he would have to recite Amitabha Buddha's name for his whole life. It's like how, if he wanted to live, he would be required to continue breathing for his whole life as it's naturally essential.

We should take Amitabha-recitation as our wisdom life, reciting Amitabha Buddha for our whole lives. From the perspective of worldly people, it appears to be suffering losses. Actually, it is an advantage. Why? Because we have the Buddha's name to recite for our whole lives, there is the Buddha for us to rely on. There is Amitabha Buddha to

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

So many interesting movies (some good some very bad) came out in 2003 aside from the Matrix sequels. Just interesting to see what the Matrix sequels competed against (in no particular order):

-The first Pirates of the Caribbean movie

-Bad Boys 2 ("in our movie we are crashing real cars!")

-The LOTR sequels

-The Last Samurai

-X2: X-men United

-Killbill Vol 1

-Old School

-Gangs of New York

-Bruce Almighty

-Elf

-Chicago

-Hulk (with Eric Bana)

-SWAT

-The Italian Job

-Charlie's Angel's sequel

-Big Fish

-Finding Nemo

-Scary Movie 3 (probably one the better entries in the franchise)

-Terminator 3 (very lackluster, to be fair)

-Daredevil (personally, I put out into "it's so bad it's good" category)

-Bad Santa

-Love Actually

-Once upon a time in Mexico (sequel to Desperado)

-The Rundown (if I am not mistaken, this was the first time for the Rock to lead a relatively decent Hollywood production)

-My Big Fat Greek Wedding

-Gigli (notable for all the hate)

-Bulletproof Monk (OK, fine, I was just hoping for SWS to become a thing between this and the Rundown)

-Bend it like Beckham (which kicked off Keira Knightley's career)

-Tomb Raider 2 (a total bomb, "in our movie, people actually fly!")

• Paycheck (John Woo's failed adaptation of a PKD story, starring Ben Affleck - and ouch! What a year for him with this, Gigli and Daredevil!)

Do your worst!

Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.

THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB

Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"

I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual

So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes

r/unclejokes for dirty jokes

r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC

r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes

Punchline !

Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub

Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat

They were cooked in Greece.

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says "is it just me, or is it hot in here?"

Then the other muffin says "AHH, TALKING MUFFIN!!!"

Don't you know a good pun is its own reword?

So I'm creating a story in which the main character is a man called Axel (literal meaning: "Peace of the Father"), he's an immortal warrior that is part of a precursor race of aliens called Nazirs that possess great magical abilities, matter of fact he's the Price of the Nazirs, son of King Avidor (Literal meaning: "Father of the Generation"). The Nazirs live in the Garden of Eden (which isn't actually an afterlife as humans believe) and they act as guardians of Earth and for thousands of years they send agents to Earth to lead and guide humanity, and to fight against similar beings from other words that try and control humanity.

At one point in the story Axel goes to Earth to lead the Israelites in the war against the Philistines, who are being controlled by a rival alien. Axel claims the identity of Samson, a mortal monk, and he lies to the mortals that his power come from God so they agree to follow his lead. His powers have no connection to God, his hair or from being a monk. Eventually he fakes his death when the biblical Samson "dies" and Axel travels back to Eden. The story eventually progresses to modern day to a point in which he acts as more of a superhero called The Nazir, living on earth with a secret identity.

His abilities are:

-Superhuman strength, allowing him to lift up to 100 ton.

Superhuman Agility and Speed: Allowing him to make great leaps and acrobatics abilities and move/react much faster than humanly possible.

Superhuman Durability: Completely bulletproof to modern human weapons, resistance to heat and cold (for comparison, lava will be as hot to him as boiling water is to humans. Nasty burn, not necessarily life threatening unless he swims in it) and is merely stunned/knocked out by direct missile fire. Also can continue fighting for weeks straight without getting tired.

-Ageless Immortality, can still be killed by other means.

-Immunity to all Earthly diseases.

-Extraordinary fighting abilities and excellent military tactician.

-Supernatural Charm: Magical charm which makes him nearly irresistible to most mortals who are attracted to men.

He also posses magical weapons, which are based on biblical artifacts:

-The Flaming Sword: A magical sword which isn't actually on fire but just glows, which cuts through nearly anything and is practically unbreakable. Can appear and disappear in his hand at will.

-Shield of David: A magical shield, also unbreakable, also can be appear and disappear in his hand at will.

-Moses' Staf

For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.

I said "hey look, an escaPEA"

No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!

Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂